if DD is given money with an request that we buy her something, we always send a thankyou with info letting them know what we bought. if it's just cash, then we put it in the bank. if it's more money than we think is reasonable to spend on her, we may buy her something small and put the rest in her account

as an example - my bestie doesn't want to go shopping for little girl things - he has girls himself and they get excited and want to buy stuff he knows DD already has or that he deems tacky. he gave her $40 and told her to go and get something for herself. we took her shopping, and she found a pair of boots she wanted from Uncle D - so we got the boots (and she loves them!) and the rest got put in her account. i think we banked about $25 of it. win win. she can thank Uncle D for her awesome boots, and her savings account goes up

i understand the reasoning behind banking the money if she has everything - but if that's the case, sacrifice something that YOU planned on giving her, and make it from them - and then bank the money from yourselves kwim? if they want you to buy something, buy - and if you wanted to give her x amount worth of presents, bank some of that amount. in 15 years or whatever, she's only going to know mum and dad contributed to the account. she's not going to hit 18 and go and show her appreciation to everyone when she gets access to the funds - let them feel like they're giving her something now that she can use now kwim?