What's taboo?

[Phteven]

Soooo......
What are the things that you will never make jokes about?
And what are the things that you will always speak up about if people are making jokes?

What are the words you will never use? And why?

I hope this thread doesn't offend anyone but it is inevitable that it's going to contain adult words and concepts.

Anyways..... for me.

I won't tell jokes about abuse, the Holocaust, GLTG/Queer people and racist jokes. Generally I find any joke about someone who can't defend themselves is odious which is why I have become such a Jordan fan after she stood up for her son when he couldn't.

As for words I don't use. Bastard is one word I was taught never to use because for an illegitimate person it can be very hurtful. I was taught by my Mother who had the whole etiquette deal down pat that really I should never insult anyone with words that might be true because I might hurt bystanders as well as my intended target. So silly toerag is fine because really no-one is literally a toe-rag but bastard is not fine because many people are bastards.
I don't use Gay to mean lame/weak for obvious reasons.
I don't use the C word because really I don't see why genitals should be an insult. There's nothing wrong with women's genitals. On the flip side I do use **** when I stuff up. Maybe that is a bit of a double standard there but since we still live in a patriarchal society I can apply the Chris Rock rule (when you've got stuff you have to put up with people who don't have stuff being rude about you).

I do use the term towel-head. I'm allowed to own it because I am it

Oh yeah, and bogan. I don't much like bogan because it's so classist - basically it says that being poor makes you a good target for ridicule. But Bogans are rich too so hating on cashed-up bogans says that only people who act like they were born with money have the right to be rich. But I can't stand the whole bogan/racist culture so yeah...... I'm mixed up about bogans and whether it's ok to hate on them.

Oh... and PC too. I dislike it when people try to justify using hurtful language by telling people who speak up against them that they are too PC. If being PC means trying your best to respect other people even those unlike yourself then I'm happy to own that. I often fall down. I have terrible foot in mouth syndrome but I like to think I can learn and when I upset people with my language I try not to do it again.

[Rouge]

I don't joke about the holocaust. I don't use the term Nazi to describe anything (ie. grammar nazi).
I don't joke about sexuality.
I don't joke about race or religion.
I don't like jokes about abuse or violence.

Some of my biggest pet peeves are:

Male Bashing Jokes
Jokes about size (especially when it's larger people picking on skinny people... because that's some how ok because?)

That's about it really.

[Maruschke]

anti-Semitism

anything that relies on one group of people being considered inferior to another

my husband

[nothing2lose]

Re: bogans. I think it's all about mindset, attitudes and values. I'm often guilty of dismissing people who don't agree with me as being bogan Something I need to work on.

I guess I am like everyone else and the things that are taboo, and shouldn't be joked about, or made light of, are the things I feel passionate about.

- Family violence
- racism
- gender equality
- social justice and equality
- the Jewish Holocaust and any form of genocide
- religious intolerance

Language is the most powerful tool/weapon we have as humans. It forms our thoughts, social mores and values - good and bad. It defines us as a society and as individuals. (Read 1984 by George Orwell or anything by Noam Chomsky if you are not sure what I am talking about.) That's why it's so important.

I don't use the c word, the n word, call things 'gay' as a putdown, use 'girl/woman' as a putdown...the list goes on

I like to think I am not being PC but RC - respectfully correct.

[Novella]

I try and avoid making jokes about race/religion however there arer times when I will laugh about very broad stereotype jokes if in the appropriate company. I dislike jokes amde about people wo cant protect themselves such as people with intellectual disability or mental health illness, child abuse. Amongst a small group of friends there are very few topics that are off limits but beyond that I try and censor what I say as you never really know what might be a trigger/sensitive topic for someone

Comments about boat people/immigrants are really getting my goat up at the moment as there seems to be a lot of anger/hate behind the jokes rather than good humour/ jest. Plus a lot of ignorance.

I dont use the c word can't stand it

As for taking the mickey out of yourself when you are part of a minority group, sometimes I find that really awkward. I find derogaroty comments offensive even when it is being used by some one of an ethnic minority for example n*gger. Thats and Im not saying its not ok to make fun of yourself, Im a blond and often make blond jokes/comment on how I have had a blond moment so I realise there is a double standard there.

I am also guilty of foot in mouth syndrome!

[forshelby]

Sushee- I mean if I were to sit around studying this metaphorical 'rulebook of life' that would be a waste of life IYKWIM? I'm not sure I know what I mean, lol.

[STARRYSKY]

I get really annoyed, especially with teenagers of my extended family who constantly use the word "gay" or "faggot" etc.. I usually ask them inane questions about why that person is so happy, or why are they a bundle of sticks?
We have quite a few same sex coupled/ single friends, we've spoken about it a few times, they don't seem to mind at all, but I feel as someone else mentioned above that language can be very powerful. Even though it may seem such a "little" thing.

I won't generally be drawn into conversations in groups where race, religion or LGBT is being bashed. I have been known to either walk away or just stare at the person making such derrogatory jokes. LOL
I have plenty to say about such topics and discuss them with the appropriate people( not nasty things) . So I suppose it does to some extent depend on who I am talking to.

Mental illness is another bug bear of mine, we have quite a bit of it in both sides of my family and Dp's.

[briggsy's girl]

i'm another that depends on audience, and anything goes with some people, yet in general i'm very respecful of everyone

i don't like tend to indulge in "gay" jokes - but when it's with my TBG, who is openly gay, it happens - he feeds me jokes, i joke back. it's just the way it is. i've had gay friends call me their fag hag - it's just what it is. it's not offensive, it just IS, kwim?? TBG is also a (very) black Indian, and there are always black vs white jokes passing between us - but it's just because of who he is. i'm not a racist person, i don't see him as anything other than my friend - but the jokes still happen because that's the friendship we have. i may bag him out about his diet being nothing but curry and rice, but i'd never say anything like that to another Indian - nor do i even think like that - it's just said in fun kwim??

i think what is taboo is really dependent on the situation, so you have to be smart enough to read the situation and choose your comments.

having said that - Holocaust, 9/11, pedophilia - nope, not on

and i must say, i find the jokes going around within hours of a celebrity death to be in really bad taste. i received more than a couple of jokes about Whitney Houston, and i just kinda shrugged and wondered why people honestly found it funny, cos it's just not something i see as funny.

[sushee]

Hmm. Maybe some religious people would find your the use of "hell" offensive? I don't think some people take too kindly to elements of their religion being made fun of

Lol it's the religious that most likely will think I will go to hell. Especially since I used the word in actual context. I'm sure my mother does!

P.S And I'm Catholic! ROFL!

[Snowy Love]

Re: bogans. I think it's all about mindset, attitudes and values. I'm often guilty of dismissing people who don't agree with me as being bogan Something I need to work on.

I like to think I am not being PC but RC - respectfully correct.

It never occured to me that bogan would be offensive to a bogan, even though when I use it I mean it in a derogatory manner - I don't refer to people with a low income or who live in a particlular suburb as bogan, behaviour determines 'boganness' to me. I wouldn't refer to them as bogan to their faces, so I guess it is - if you can't say something to someones face it must be offensive.

I'm taking RC - might use it next time PIL go off about political correctness.

[Lenny]

I used to use Gay as a derogatory term. I never gave it a thought. Until a BB member pointed out how offensive it was and why. I was so glad she said - it had up until then seemed harmless. So thanks to her - she changed me, and my DH. Ditto to witch, although i didn't really use it.

I use the term ferral. I've yet to be convinced that it's not a great descriptive word for my neighbours.

There are words i won't use like 4 letter word for rooster, and the other 4 letter c word. I find them offensive. They make me shudder.

[HotI]

Some words are taboo in some settings but not others. Among friends with physical limitations, i may use the word cripple (cripple parking sticker), but i wouldn't use it with people who weren't friends. Also, i would be happy for some (able bod) friends to use these terms, but not so much for others- kinda like when your Dad tries to talk teenage language and he just doesn't pull it off.

[Rouge]

I nearly put the word bogan up there. I've been trying lately to use it less, for the reasons you mentioned. And I see it to myself as hypocritical.

[Maruschke]

I used to use Gay as a derogatory term. I never gave it a thought. Until a BB member pointed out how offensive it was and why. I was so glad she said - it had up until then seemed harmless. So thanks to her - she changed me, and my DH. Ditto to witch, although i didn't really use it.

I use the term ferral. I've yet to be convinced that it's not a great descriptive word for my neighbours.

There are words i won't use like 4 letter word for rooster, and the other 4 letter c word. I find them offensive. They make me shudder.

That's a big one. Any time someone says, for example, "that movie was gay", I ask... "what was so homosexual about that movie"???? It usually stops them. Probably only stops them when I am around, but I seriously dislike the use of gay as a derogatory word.

[lilima]

I too became a Katie Price fan. As someone who works in he disability sector I see first hand how hurtful terms like 'mental' and 'spastic' can be to some people.

[luna moth]

I too became a Katie Price fan. As someone who works in he disability sector I see first hand how hurtful terms like 'mental' and 'spastic' can be to some people.

Retard.

(ETA - not calling you one, just adding it as an example!)

I get sucked in by what people around me are saying, and I end up using it too, even when I disagree with it.

I have a guttermouth, but I find it pretty easy to switch on and off.

Tourette's I will never joke about, or schizophrenia, and I will shoot down in flames anyone who does - they're both so misunderstood.

Animal cruelty and eating meat. I'm normally pretty placid about what other people do, but if they try to accuse someone else of animal cruelty, I will get offended and turn the mirror. And it's not funny to offer me the tray of meat or the cheese platter. It's actually pretty upsetting.

And safety - I got really upset when Magda Szubanski "joked" about using her car door to take out a cyclist. It only takes one perspn to not realise she's joking, and my baby girl is left without a dadda. So that sort of stuff, although I am fully guilty of joking about baby shaking.

Double standards - don't joke about them. I have so many I'll surely get offended!

[~*familyof3*~]

I to am like sushee. Pretty much anything goes yet im finding more and more things i am trying to stop saying

[glenny_c]

It's strange, I think it has a lot to do with the audience, i.e who's saying it. There are some things that some of my friends say and joke about which I find funny in their company but would never share with others as I am aware of how it could be taken badly. I think I laugh with them because I know it is said innocently, these people would never knowingly hurt or insult someone and I know they don't mean anything maliciously. I guess that means I have double standards.

I think even in their company though, I would never joke about or accept jokes about child porn or paedophilia. That seems to be my limit. I have been guilty of sharing jokes about gay people (never saying being gay is bad, just laughing at stereotypes), bogans for sure, pretty much anything! I used to say that the only reason DD wasn't buried in the backyard is that she was so darn cute. (back when she had silent refux and screamed all day). Again though, I wouldn't have said something like that to a stranger in case it was taken out of context- not how I meant it.

I have no idea if any of that makes any sense whatsoever?