IVF - Grief, lies and damned statistics....A very good article from The Guardian

[nothing2lose]

A friend posted this article on FB today. I thought it made some very important points.

Essential reading if you're undergoing IVF.


IVF: 'Where's all that grief going?' | Society | The Guardian

[myturn]

That was depressing.....

[Andie78]

and realistic... the grief bit especially. interesting article.

[nothing2lose]

That was depressing.....

Sorry, it's not meant to be depressing

[myturn]

I know it wasn't. Andie is right - its realistic - and that's good. But it's still sad.

Sometimes pretending its just going to happen helps.

I really am scared its not going to I just want a little one to call my own. I feel empty and pointless. And I guess that's the whole point of the article.... What happens with all this emotion - how do we reconcile it all and what do we do with it all. I sometimes wish I could go somewhere and we could all cry together - like people do at a funeral - they are not grieving alone. But we do.

[nothing2lose]

That's the thing. People who aren't successful just fade away because no one wants to hear about it. No one wants to hear about the grief, the loss, the overwhelming sense of failure, the fear...They don't get it.

People who are currently doing ivf don't want to hear about it either because it's too real. Everyone's meant to be positive. 'It will happen' they say. Well it didnt for me, and I have to come to terms with that.

[kerbear]

It is so true, you feel like you just disappear when you have to say its over and it is like mourning a death, it's the death of not being able to reproduce a part of you and your partner. think there should be more information to help people who are at this point to maybe have support from others at the same place in this traumatic journey. I know I wish I had someone at the same place to talk with a lot of the time.