just need a vent!!!! sorry

[mummy2chloe]

Hey

Sorry inadvance for this i just really dont know what to do, or what to think or even how to feel.

i am on my first round of ivf, the clinic is 170klms away from where i live so they class me as a rural client. well everything so far has been going good up unitl now. i had to have day 5 bloods done yesterday to check to see how my levels are going on the 100iu of puregon, cos i have a history of OHSS so thats why i am on a low dose of puregon and why i have to have the early bloods. anyway got the results back yesterday afternoon and the ivf nurse rang and said they are a bit to high for day 5, so she told me to still have the 100iu's last night cos she couldnt get the fs as he was out of his office, she said that she hopes that the injection of the full 100 shouldnt hopefully make to much of a difference, and then she said that they would call me today after talking to fs about my levels cos they think he will drop it to 75iu. well i called them today after work and she said she STILL couldnt get a hold of fs, she was going to try him later on this arvo so she said i will call you after that. well she rings me at 7.45pm tonight to tell me that she STILL HASNT SPOKEN TO HIM!!!!!!!!!! and that i have to have another full dose of 100iu and she will try to talk to fs tomorrow. plus she wants me to get another blood test tomorrow if i can, but i dont know wether the pathology lab will send them on a saturday being a rural client. and she said if they dont send them then dont worry about getting the bloods done, just wait until we see you monday for you ultrasound.

I am sooooooooooooooo ****ed off at the moment, if i am to high then why then hell am i still injecting 100iu's?????????? if i am to high then why the hell isnt my FS making me feel like i am important enough to actually do something about it??????? i feel soooooooooo angry and lost and frusturated (sp?) and scared and sore and just dont know what to do or how to feel, i know one thing i do feel and that is my fs and the ivf clinic dont give a **** about me!!! there happy they got there $6777.00 last week so now they dont give two hoots about me and now there leaving me hanging, and tell me my levels are too high but yet i am still injecting the same amount, so go figure

so sorry if this dosent make any sense, and sorry for rambling on just got know one else to turn to who would understand what i am talking about.

[S'rose]

Oh M2C, you have a great big from me to you.
It must be just awful to feel like you are unimportant especially when you are laying your body in someone else's hands. You have every right to be furious and worried and loads of other feelings all at the same time.
I am glad you are venting and sharing the burden with some people who completely understand how you are feeling. I hope that it doesn't cost you the cycle, and that it can be redeemed, and if it can't you need to have some serious words with that FS about being left to hang out to dry like this.

[Kahlan]

Now I am very peeved with your FS and the clinic. How can they not be able to get a hold of your FS???? I was not a risk of OHSS but I still got my FS's mobile no. to ring just in case of emergency. I actually called him on a Sat night just before my trigger injection because I had some bleeding and he was very good about it. That is what you call good service... caring health professionals!

I think you should demand that they find an alternative way to communicate with the FS because it is not good enough!

*calming down*... so sorry hun... It just makes me angry to read how careless some people are... I hope that on Tuesday thing turn out o.k. for you and by then if your levels are still too high they can drastically reduce it in time to prevent OHSS down the track.

[butterfly_warrior]

M2C, as someone else with a history of OHSS I can understand the absolute terror you are feeling at the moment. As for your FS - he'd better have a damned good reason for disappearing off the face of the planet at such a time!

I think if it were me and he's still not contactable today I'd be telling the nurse something along the lines of "I'm scared as hell and I'm dropping to 75IU anyway, and you'd damned well better do something to help me out even if it means contacting a different doctor!".

Sheesh... I want to go smack your clinic around myself! Hang in there, and hopefully your levels aren't dangerously high just yet. Do you know what your E2 numbers were, by any chance?

BW

[Caramello]

I'd be angry as well!

My clinic has a doctor on standby at all times - so at least if its not your FS it is someone equally qualified to make a decision.

The only other option - can you get your FS email address - I find that this is the best way to contact my FS if I can't get him by phone.

Also, I would be chucking a huge tanty at the nurse. Sometimes doing this scares people into action (I know, I know, not very dignified, but sometimes it does work).

[briggsy's girl]

Also, I would be chucking a huge tanty at the nurse. Sometimes doing this scares people into action (I know, I know, not very dignified, but sometimes it does work).

Ditto what G said - throw a tanty. i've only ever had mild OHSS - and that was bad enough! given you KNOW you have a history of OHSS, they should be bending over backwards to help you out. call the nurse, make a HUGE song and dance, and keep calling every hour until they've gotten hold of your FS - and if not YOUR FS, another one to guide them.

don't let them "forget" about you. being regional is such a load of crap as an excuse - they should be looking after you the same as any other client - and hun, this is unacceptable!

thinking of you

BG

[mummy2chloe]

Thanks everyone so much for your replies

i have just got home from having my bloods done, just after walking out of the pathology lab my ivf nurse rang to see how i got on and i told her that they can get it couriered (sp?) to them today, so she said she will ring me this arvo to tell me what my levels are doing, BW i dont know what my levels are, but will ask today what the numbers are.

i just cant believe that this has happened, they KNOW that i have a history and that is why they wanted to do the early bloods, yet the results are in and they cant do anything about it cos stupid fs is not around, my ivf nurses are absolutely lovely, i have been dealing with them since day 1, i have only ever seen fs once and that was before we started and now that i need him he is not bl*ody here!!!!!! great fs i have got

i will be back later after i have the results and will let you know what is going on. thanks again everyone, you guys have made me feel like i have every right to feel the way i do and that makes me feel better cos right now i am to scared and worried to know what to really feel, just confused and unhappy and feeling sore. I am tired and just feel like i dont want to do this anymore

[Possums]

mummyto chloe, chloe sounds so lovely, you are lucky to have such a wonderful daughter
I hope things pick up for you

[nicjay]

Thanks for that M2C I hope we finally have some luck!

It is awful not being able to give your child what they want isn't it? I would do anything for my DD. Secondary infertility sucks Anyway, same goes here if you ever need to talk please PM me too.

Good luck again!