Long Term TTC & Assisted Conception#3 - April 07

oh Nic what a long wait unitl May 3rd! isnt your DH lovely. my hubby frets too when its my health. take care and try not to stress. and i indeed plan to have a great night at PINK. im taking 3 friends with me so we have all been texting each other all morning about what to wear, how much money etc.... its going to be great! then after a late night, back for the 45 min drive to clinic by 8am for blood test to see if my ovaries are responding to my upped puregon dose. fingers crossed all is fine and i have u/s and EPU this week!

Hi ladies,

Thought I had best drop in and introduce myself and say Hi.
I have been mainly in the Clomid/Metformin thread, but unless this current cycle of clomid is successful, I will be joining you lovely people in here.
I have just registered with Monash IVF (To have treatment at one of it's regional clinics) and have just booked in for all the prelim tests, although I couldn't get in for an ultrasound until mid June, so I have booked all the other screening tests, SA, etc for the same day.
Planning on commencing first stim cycle in July.
Has anyone in here been treated at a regional clinic?
Hope to get to know you all better and see everybody graduate with BFP's
:D

Hi A Tryingtime, Fingers crossed this cycles worked for you, but not because we dont want you to join us.
Nic Glad you are going back, thats a long wait, could you get the bloods done before then somewhere else?
Sonya Enjoy yourself at Pink!

Nothing new TTC - bodywise to report

Thanks ladies for your well wishes,

Went to Gp and also told him about the bleeding that im still having so he's booked me in for a colonoscopy!TUESDAY PM!yes that right and having TF on Thursday !!!arhhhhhhh.

Can it get any better, maybe i shouldnt have said that!!!! will hopefully get results asap

Got to go out for staff social!

:wall: Ok, self-absorbed vent ahead...

I have just had a horrible, frustrating, confusing day... and discovered that there is an outright b!tch working in the Penrith medicare office!

The receipt from the anaesthetist turned up in the mail the other day, so I made yet another trip into medicare with that and the receipt from the last consultation with the FS, which I forgot to take with the cycle receipt the other day... Only to find out that there's some sort of exclusion period due to the cycle we just did, and the appointment fell within that. As far as medicare is concerned, that appointment was part of our cycle and we therefore can't claim. As soon as I heard the words "you can't claim this" that triggered a major anxiety attack... and the woman at the medicare office was SO rude! I was freaking out and couldn't understand what she was telling me, and she just kept telling me to take it up with my clinic... take WHAT up with my clinic, I don't understand what's happening here!!! :wall: Eventually I got her to write something down on the back of the receipt for me... but I'll give the job of trying to sort it out with the clinic over to DH - I can do without the anxiety right now!

And then there was the trip to the pharmacy to pick up the slow release metformin... He gave me a script for 850mg slow release metformin... which (and you'll love this one, Summer!) doesn't actually exist! So the pharmacist had to call my FS and sort it all out - I have to go back to 500mg tablets three times a day, which is a pain, but not as painful as having my intestines shredded by the wrath of metformin! So... Summer, you can take that little story to your FS and tell him to shove it where it fits - slow release metformin only exists in 500mg tablets!

GAH!!!! :wall: :wall: Now to get myself calmed down...

BW

:hugs: BW Silly medicare person. Its not like she didnt know what you had been through lately. Just leave it all for now and get it sorted another day.

I would recommend a nice hot warm bubble bath or come and chat with me

And as for the metformin, I will kindly inform him, maybe ask him where he would like it shoved! You made me smile so much with that comment.

At least I can make someone smile! :lol: Between you and Ryn, I'm getting there!

BW

BW - hun, i'm so sorry you've had such a shocking time today. some people are just downright rude! sorry you weren't able to sort out the metformin thing to be on xr - my fs said that 1000mg of xr once a day had a similar impact to the 850mg twice daily, but not as many side effects. hopefully your stomach will settle down too!

SS - i'd be going into your appointment with FS and asking which orifice he'd prefer!!

Lou - here's hoping you have a decent week next week - about time it got a little better for you.

ATT - welcome - but i'm really hoping you don't have to graduate to this thread!

as for me - well, positive me lasted til bed time last night, when i got a little bit anious talking to DH about what might be next week - but then i realised i can't do anything about it til next week, so feeling a little better. still worried, but i'll get there. my bro/sil and their three kidlets have just arrived for a visit until - well - i have no idea when they're leaving, but by the amount of stuff they just dragged in, i'm guessing not soon!! might be a little quiet this weekend....

Thanks, BG. I think I left that bit out - the pharmacist called the FS, and the script was changed back to 500mg of XR, but three per day instead of two. I know I do ok on that, and that's what I was on when I finally got the excess weight off me.

By that point in time I'd pretty much given up on anything going smoothly today, and was mostly just amused about Summer's FS telling her that XR metformin only existed in higher dosages... How wrong can doctors be, really?!

Anyway, shocking headache now - always happens after anxiety attacks for me, so I think I'll get away from the computer for a bit.

BW

hope the headache clears up soon BW - take care

:wall: :angry: My day just gets better and better... phone call from my mother!

Now, the background so that this makes sense - I come from a very large, very Dutch family - think loud, lots of food, lots of gossip. And every single damn one of them (mum has 4 sisters and one brother) has conceived easily... Except mum's brother's wife who has PCOS and went through the whole AC thing about 20 years ago. I'd been keeping in touch with my aunt via email lately - as she's the one person in the family who can actually sorta understand what we're going through here. I hadn't got around to calling mum since shortly after the EPU. The majority of said family all live in Newcastle, so there are often big family dinners that I never even know about until afterwards, and there was one such dinner last weekend... at which point my aunt told my mum about our 4 snowbubs. Now, I'm fine with that, I was going to call mum eventually and let her know sooner or later... but now I'm convinced that the whole damn extended family knows about us doing IVF - this is so NOT what I wanted! Yes, I have told a lot of people, because I feel that support is needed... but the control over who knows and who knows what is the one little bit of control that you actually have in this process, and now I'm feeling like that's all been snatched away from me. And next time I see the whole extended family if I'm NOT pregnant, they're ALL going to be all "poor little BW" over me... I just can't face that! Particularly as the next time I see them all is likely to be Christmas and if I'm not pregnant by then, I'm SO not going to be in the mood to face it all! It's not as if Christmas isn't hard enough anyway without that!

I feel like I'm playing whack-a-mole with the anxiety issues at the moment - no sooner do you get one thing sorted out, then another pops up. I just can't win! :cry:

BW

Oh BW, sending you lots of hugs :hug:

Summer, I don't know about getting the bloods done before then, the letter says the test needs to be repeated in a month, and the Dr also wrote "Mid May" on the blood forms.

Nic

BW...hang in there girl...I didn't do Christmas last year as my brother announced he 'had accidentally' got his girlfriend pregnant...I LOST IT...so stayed home...DH and I had the best Chrissy ever! Self preservation is the only way to go...say what you need to say and do what you need to do...coz believe me...everyone else does!!!! Take care hun...lots of hugs x

Hi BW - things haven't gone too well today! Hope they look up for the weekend. Anxiety is a tough companion sometimes.

(I am also from a dutch family - i understand - :wall:)
DH and i lost 'control' over what we considered to be very personal information to do with our infertility, and for this reason, sadly, we decided that we could tell no-one about our journey anymore. Certain people (on both sides of the family) decided that our infertility and the steps we were taking was 'news' to be discussed and gossiped over freely.
I miss the support that family might have provided, but in the long run - for us- this will be the right choice. I hope that you can continue to receive support and help from your family.

Hi everyone!
Transfer will be in approximately 11hours from now, not that I'm counting! I can't wait to have those two little souls inside me to take care of...... hurry up tomorrow! I am a bit nervous though about how many have made it to blast and am terrified of the TWW and finding out results. OMG I am soooo scared of how I will feel if it doesnt work again.
I understand about families and personal info getting around. I didnt tell my family until after our 3rd stim cycle and my mum decided to tell her 4 sisters and 3 brothers and all their partners "just so noone says anything to upset you if they are aware". gee thanks mum, did you get a billboard too?
Hope everyone is going ok.
Lou with feeling so bad, poor thing.
Sonya, hope your meds start working,
Ellie, hope you are surviving the TWW
BG horray for the lymph results!!!!! and Yay on the good attitude!
Hi to everyone else, sorry too many of us in here. Lets get a few more BFP so we can move in here again!
Hugs, Sazz

In the end I called mum back last night. She said it was a quiet conversation between her and the aunt and uncle that know. Nobody else was around. :rolleyes: Yeah, right - the whole idea of my mum and quiet just doesn't fit.

Then she got all freaked out because I was in a state when I called her, and started to do her usual sulking thing about being accused of doing the wrong thing. She even tried to tell me that if the rest of the family know they would be sympathetic. :rolleyes: I do not want pity! Because quite simply they just won't understand and will say the wrong thing. I tried to explain to mum about the anxiety disorder... and she just kept telling me to stop stressing :wall: - like I can help it! Certainly, I'll just stop worrying about things because I've been told not to, she just doesn't get that it doesn't work that way, and I can't really help what happens when something triggers an anxiety episode. I'm still running through what the FS talked about... Does it matter now? Will it matter in XXX amount of time? Am I imagining the worst? What can I do to find out the truth? Can I give this problem to DH and take it off my plate? Running myself through those questions is helping - and it usually gets me to take some sort of positive action towards resolving the problem that has arisen... but if my mother just doesn't get it, things are going to be... interesting... where she is concerned.

I suspect I also have some news on the letrozole front... I'm starting to feel twinges and niggles in my ovaries! I think it may actually work! Although, last night's OPK was completely blank, so I still have my doubts. I just can't help myself - I'm temping, checking CM, using OPKs... if I'm going to ovulate, it's not going to sneak by me!

BW

BW - glad you talked it through with your mum - even if it wasn't super prodcutive - at least you've been able to make it clear that you don't want the whole famly knowing. this is a very private journey for you and DH and you should be able to discuss it with people on your terms.

as for the anxiety issues - to be completely honest, i don't think there are too many people anywhere that haven't had the issues themselves that understand what it's like. until i started suffering from them, i had no idea how crippling they coule be, and how little control i had over the whole situation!i can only hope that one day your family comes to understand this - and if not, it sounds like your DH is really supportive, and us BB girls will be here 110% for you!!

If i was paid a $1 for everytime I heard stop stressing, as BG said it just doesnt work like that as you already know. People dont have any idea. Some people say they understand but have no idea. How can you explain to someone that one minute your fine, the next you are feeling like you cant breathe, are going to die and cant do anything to stop the feeling no matter what you try.
Just take each part of the day as little bits to get through. Thats the only way im getting through things at the moment, Make it to this time, lunch time and then work on. I slept for about 9 hours last night and still worn out. I stopped talking the metformin last night, DH is mad but then came around when I explained I just dont feel right. I HATE feeling like this, this is no quality of life, having the effects of metformin and anxiety, I want to enjoy life.

it's only a few days til you see the FS again hun, and definitely better to have you feeling physically ok than to go on taking a medication that is making you feel so bad that you're not enjoying life!

i'm so glad i'm not the only person that works on small incrememnts - an average day at work is broken up into sessions of less than an hour just so that i can get by!

Thanks BG and Sazz, was hoping someone would reply to my post. felling very confused and worried and am in need of a little support at the moment

we're always here to support you Lou! we all have times when we're here to support each other, and times when we have to draw as much support from each other as possible - this is your turn to take and i'm happy to be the giver!!!

take care hun!

Sazz - Loads of good luck and +++vibes for the TF.

Lou - a colonoscopy on tuesday - that sounds daunting, but great that your doc's prepared to book you in and not wait longer - leaving you in discomfort and also in a state of worrying. I hope the results are speedy and clear. Waiting is not a nice place to be. I will be thinking of you.

SS - sorry that things haven't been great. I really hope that the sun in your life comes back soon.

BG - you are just a trooper at the moment and seem to be great - i hope that you are doing fine ATM. Having visitors can be a doubled edged sword - but hopefully they are taking your mind off things and making time fly.

I screwed up my first jab :doh: - and ended up on the phone to the nurses in a mini panic. The 9 & 1/2 minutes waiting for them to pick up didn't calm me down at all either. DH was playing with the pen last night and i blame him totally!!!! I ended up taking a second shot and it went perfectly, so all is well that ends well. I may have doubled dosed, but i really truely doubt it.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. There are a lot of you in my thoughts.
Jo

grrrrr at dh's curiosity jo!!! that would have been very frustrating, especially the wait!

sazz, how'd things go? fingers crossed for you!

weekend going ok so far. visitors have decided to stay tonite again - have gobe home to get more clothes. left the older two kids here, so aunty bg has been finding things for the to do. bro and sil are going to the local rodeo tonite - will take the kids for a little while, but rest of the night i'll be looking after the kidlets. is much easier when mummy and daddy aren't around. aunty bg's rules stand - they can't go and ask their folks to change the rules!

was asked earlier if having someone elses kids around changed my mind about the ttc journey at all - not a chance! admittedly, i'm happy when they go home, but that's cos they don'y LIVE here so they don't have all their own toys and things and tend to get a bit bored after a couple of days - if they were our kidlets it would be heaps different! if anything, having them around makes me want a family of my own even more - love my bro's family, but i have to give them back... i want one of my own!!!!

still feeling decidedly positive (albeit very tired) today - had a few quiet ****tails last night and it was great to be able to have a nice relaxing night. Bro and SIL asked a couple of questions about what was happening, and it was nice to share with them. they volunteered their middle child as a keeper for us - but no thanks - i want a newborn we can corrupt in our own image!!! middle kid is already five...

looking forward to thursday's FS appointment - just want to get the ball rolling again while i'm still enthusiastic about it all iykwim? i don't care if we have to move to IVF - i just want to KNOW what we're going to do! (heheheh - not that i'm an impatient control freak or anything!!)

Lou - Lots of hugs for you :hug: Will be thinking of you next week.

BG - Hope you have a fun filled weekend!

Sazz - Hope you are resting up this arvo and being taken care of :)

Nic

Hi Girls
Just a quick one as I'm getting ready for my friends wedding...have spent the morning setting it up...talk about pressure!!!! Just got my blood results...e2=2900 p4=120...nurse said it looks really good...and even better...they are going to do my beta next Saturday! YIPPEE! Only 7 more sleeps!!!!!

that's great news ellie! good luck (and enjoy the wedding hun!)

[B]MY BODY CAN GO TAKE A HIKE!!![B]

had my blood test this morning to see if upped dose of Puregon is working. Bad news!! after 7 days of 100IU and 4 days of 150IU my oestregen levels are only 540!!!!!:(
Apparently i need my levels to be 600-800 PER FOLLICLE!

so now FS wants me to come in for ultrasound on Monday to see whats happening in there. crossed fingers a little miracle happens over my next two injections and i miraculously makes lots of follicles!!!

This is SOOOOO frustrating. why o why does my body not do as it is told!!!!!:angry:

Sorry for all the anger, feel like i have got some off of my chest. cant really talk to DH as he isnt the sort to understand why i get worked up. he thinks positive all the time, but i feel like i am letting us down and i cant even control it. maybe i just need to have a good cry to cleanse my emotions. its been a few months since my last teary session.

I'm sorry, Sonya. I really don't know what else to say... I know it's frustrating, but at least they are avoiding giving you too much and having you jump straight from no response to an over response. The scan will be a good idea, it will tell them exactly what's going on and hopefully give you a plan ahead that you can have confidence in.

A very lazy, sleepy day here... still in pjs, and loving it! BG, you did realise I was just mucking around and joking, didn't you?

BW

Hi Ladies

Sonya - Im so sorry to hear the body is playing like it should! But dont give up yet, i have my fingers crossed for you!

BW - Yay to the PJ's i wish!

Ellie- Congrats on the results

Loula - Hope you are doing ok hun.. if you ever need a shoulder!

To everyone else good luck and fingers crossed..

Things here are good Af has just left us... Yipee and now we wait until thurs to see if this double dose is working. The side affects definatelly are! Thurs will also be the end of our 2 week sabatical after the lap.. and dh can't wait. hehe. That's one thing that i've never heard mentioned in here.. the BDing .. it goes from being scheduled and drs telling when to and to just do it all the time.. and then with IVF lots of abstinance.. frustrating! Oh well ignore my rant..

Went shopping today for my new neice who should be arriving in the next 2 weeks.. and am now ultra clucky.. but it was fun.

S

Hi all,
Horray Ellie on your good bloods. Is it monitoring how your hormones are building up on their own to support a pg???? Sounds promising. hope you enjoyed yourself yesterday.
Sonya, darn that stubborn body of yours...:whip: I hope you do get a response in the next couple of days so you can keep on going. We are thinking of you!
Lou, hope you are going ok... are you in pain? I am thinking of you and hope next week is a positive one with lots of good results.
Shannon. lol at the BDing. You will have to make it special after such a wait ;) And yes you are right, in this thread we dont really talk about it much 'cause for a lot of us it doesnt really effect the conception side of things, it is just for sport! hehe.
BW, Summer, I know what you mean about being told to stop stressing, my husband does it all the time. He just doesnt understand at all, as much as he tries. I cant just switch it off! It is infuriating because I want him to tell me all the reasons why it is going to be ok not jut tell me "dont worry" "stop stressing" "you will make yourself ill" (referring to my mental state in the past). Ok, I'll just stop that shall I?

Me Had transfer today and all went well. We have 2 day 4 blasts traveling aboard the mother ship and another two ready to freeze monday. BW I got all the info today regarding compacting embryos and apparently it is a good thing and you want that to be happening because that is what they do just before they are "hatching blasts". If they dont compact they will not get to the next stage and will not be viable. We had two like that left after transfer but the other 5 havent done that yet. If they havent caught up and done that by monday (freeze time) they will be deemed useless and discarded (!) I hope I dont need them!
I was pleased they did transfer with an ultrasound too so we could see the blob of embryos and fluid left in the uterus as the catheter was removed and are sure they are actually in there!
Question time now... when do they "Stick" is it day 5-9 somewhere? When should I start testing? The clinic says dont do it at all as it wont be true but girls on here do... when can I track the drugs fading out and my hormones kicking in when I have had day 4 transfer, not IUI and crinone up till the day I have my BT? I havent heard from anyone in my position I dont think. Help, I am a nervous wreck already :help:
Hi to everyone else
Sazz

Sonya Hun - anger like thiat is an emotion i can totally relate to - my body has done the exact same thing - TWICE! it's not an easy thing to deal with - i went through the guilt and hatred of my body too, the feeling of letting myself and my DH down by not responding - and being so overwhelmed by it all that i just wanted to throw in the towel - there's nothing i can say that will magically make it ok, but i do want to join BW in saying that it's great they are monitoring you so closely - my FS admitted there are times when people don't respond well and can end up on injectables for several weeks while they're being monitored so that they get an appropriate response - so there's still hope. i really hope they give you some answers this week and can work out a plan to move forward. my email addy is in my profile if you want to chat off the forums - i'm a pretty good listener (and have been through it fairly recently, so i can completely relate) - good luck sweetie

BW - yay for the PJ day! i kicked around in my PJ's til around half four, then umped int he shower and ended up in trackies and a singlet - barely a change! i figured you were kidding earlier - i just had to jump in and rescue the kidlets from each other so didn't really have much more time online today!

to everyone else a big hi - was going to do more personals, but was in the middle of typing this and one of our neighbours turned up (rather drunk) deciding it was time to have drinks with bro and DH - yay - finally get bro's kids to sleep so we can have a quiet night, and noisy neighbour turns up!!!! grrrrrrrrrrrrrr (i'm so glad i bought the full West Wing series seeing i'm now going to miss the final ep!! not happy!!)

Hi Ladies,

I haven't posted for about 6ths I just needed some time away for a while, so I hope you don't mind if I join in here? I was posting in the 6mth + thread before but considering that we are fast approching the 2yr ttc mark I thought I might feel more comfortable posting here.

I'm off to catch up on as much as my brain can handle :computer:

Is anyone taking any alternative or health supplements to support your health though IVF treatments.........I've come across a supplement called Ovulex and just wondered if its worth a try??
I have done years of natrual and alternative therapies, and although I felt great on these obviously nothing has assisted that egg and sperm to do the dance:dance: :fertilise: .....So I just wondered if anyone has any suggestions or reflections??
Hugs

Hi all, feeling a little better today iam viewing the clean out for Tuesday as a great way to get rid of any toxins for my TF on thursday, just wish it wasnt all so close together, its almost 24hrs from each other thats why im a little stressed.

I am really worried though, the last thing i want one day b4 tf is to find out something that will push back out TTC again.

Does anyone thhink that the proceedures so close together will do anything?

sorry for the lack of personels

Ickimum i try every thing alternitive i am seeing Antonia Rudal

lou, is it worth contacting your clinic and asking them what they think about having the tf so soon after other procedure - they'd be the best judge of whether it would have an impact or not? i know you don't want to delay the tf at all, but i'm guessing you don't want to have anything that happens that will reduce the risk of the embie sticking...

good luck - and glad you're feeling better hun!

Rachm, you have been missed! Welcome back. I hope the break has done you good. :hug: You should find a few familiar faces still around, too.

Ickimum, I don't think it's a good idea to take much stuff with IVF. I keep going with the acupuncture treatments, but I cut out all the other supplements I take and only take the prescription meds that I can't be without. There's even some of the prescription meds that I need that I can't have, so I assume that taking anything without it first being cleared by your FS is a bad idea.

Lou, I hope the colonoscopy goes fine and doesn't get in the way of the transfer. Here's hoping for good results all round for you.

BW

Ovulex has some huge claims, so I am always a bit cautious. I've done everything in my day from herbal, to all the wacky therapies you can think of........10 years is a lot of time to play with these things. I have to import them from the USA, and they are a bit pricey(not bank breaking though) I might give it a go while I am waiting for the FS to start us off..........ya never never know ;O) But I am level headed about it,
Hugs Nickimum

When i spoke to the clinic they seem to think that it will be ok as its a very standard proceedure and its really only up to how i feel.

They will be thawing our 9 embies at monash on Tuesday afternoon, prob while im asleep in op! so hopfully i will get good results on Wednesday for tf Thursday if all nine grow to blastie then we will refreeze the remaining. i already had two pg from this batch of eggies but before i had my tubal op, so hoping that they will stick, stick, stick by the weekend.

Thanks BW, it's nice to be back. I have missed the support.

thanx girls for your support and encouragement. i am just going to wait and see what is happening on my ultrasound tomorrow morning and then take it from there. hopefully there is something happining in my ovaries RIGHT NOW and things will be looking up. i am just a bit selfish because i have only had my tubes tied and thought this would be fairly manageable, compared to you strong women who have a variety of complications. It just goes to show, no matter what your situation, IVF is a frustrating and emotionally demanding time. today would have been my EPU if puregon had worked as last friday 13 should have been my original transfer if AF was on time and body had reacted to Synarel i just hope this cycle isnt cancelled for some reason.

oh well enough sooking about me. Ellie- everything sounds great for you!!
sazzafrazz- sticky vibes for you honey, congrats on the transfer
rachm - welcome back, i'm new but sure we will chat soon.
BG - THANKYOU so much for the offer of personal support. this is why i joined BB because the one girl i know that has done IVF got OHSS after 5 days of treatment but had transfer 1 month later and now has beautiful twin girls. so chatting to peo0ple with experience, both physically and emotionally is so helpful (though i wish none of us had to go through these things!)

Oh well positive thoughts for today. MIL cooking roast chook lunch, will have to let her know what going on without crying. might just say i having scan tomorrow to see where im at. dont feel like actually speaking the words of NOT RESPONDING at the mo. but good side is no dishes, no cooking and getting out of the house and driving somewhere apart from the clinic. YAY!

HAPPY THOUGHTS HAPPY THOUGHTS HAPPY THOUGHTS!!!

have a good sunday girls and will chat again tomorrow.....(if i can keep myself away from here, SOOOO addicted!!!)