I am feeling pretty gutted at the moment. I just had an appt with the gynae for review.

She told me that the blood tests indicated that I didn't ovulate this cycle (on Clomid). Also, my husbands's repeat sperm analysis showed low concentration, low motility and high number of abnormalities. She said with his results that it would be extremely unlikely for us to be able to conceive without IVF. So, she's given me a prescription for provera to bring on AF, and 100mg Clomid (since the 50mg wasn't doing the trick) to see if I ovulate. But she's also given me a referral to an IVF specialist (Dr Bob Watson). I sobbed the entire way home in the car, and now I have a headache (which I always get after crying hard).

To make it worse, the receptionist at the gynae's (who, by the way, is very nice and very friendly) said to me 'well, you just need to relax and then it will happen' :fuming: How ridiculous. Do you think I would be seeing a specialist if I just needed to relax. I'd go to a bloody health farm :evil:

I am just feeling so so sad We can't afford IVF at the moment. We've only just taken out private health insurance, and won't be eligible for anything until December this year, so now I'm facing a whole year of waiting (makes the TWW seem tiny!). Before I knew I had fertility problems, DH and I had always talked about having a big family, because I grew up in a big family and loved the feeling of love and support of having lots of siblings. We were planning on 4-6 kids. Now, it seems like it's going to be a struggle just to have 1.

How do you keep going on when the life you foresaw for yourself doesn't eventuate. I can't keep going working in my job for the rest of my life. It has no meaning for me. It might seem like I'm jumping the gun, but I'm struggling imaging a life where I may never have children, and I don't think I could handle it. I'm just so so sad, and I don't know what to do to make it feel any better.

Sorry for being a sad sack guys ... but I really just needed to vent to someone.