Sometimes you just have to laugh

[Keta]

So I have been feeling a bit fragile with getting a BFN in the middle of my dads heart attack and a terrible week so far at work and I was thinking I really need to find the lighter side - for the sake of self preservtion!

I'm only new to this AC journey and from the looks of it we will have some way to go (if I can help DHget his head around it all and understand the drugs used are safe). This got me thinking that even in this short time there have been a few moments of laugh or cry. Thankfully I have found the strength to laugh.
My first moment was at our first fs appointment. After being told our fears were correct and we would need AC, then given a lesson in using the puregon pen needle and handed over the drugs the nurse said "Its really cool you even get a free cooler bag and freezer brick". All we wanted to say to her was keep your pleeping cooler bag and freezer brick we just want a baby. At the time I was frustrated but had to laugh when I was recently hunting for a cooler bag and thought - "oh I know..." lol.

Another moment was my hsg scan. I walked in the room to be greeted by two women and the doctor. I was then promptly told they had no stirups available and that these lovely ladies would hold my legs in the air. Laughing over crying seemed the easiest response since all dignity was about to be lost!

The following week when preparing to have my internal u/s I had my legs in stirups thinking this is much better when the fire alarm ent off. All I could think was 'Im in this position now and Im not moving'.

The final momentwas getting a text message saying please have intercourse tonight and tomorrow night and then come in for another scan and bt on Friday. Never thought I'd get a message like that.

Surely Im not the only one who has had those moments where you don't know whether to laugh or cry .. or maybe I am........

[nothing2lose]

I know what you mean Keta.

When I had my beta test last cycle I had been getting positive hpts all week. I stupidly decided to take a couple in to show the nurse. Why? Who knows I caught the train and then the tram to the clinic, my hpts safely in my handbag. When, you guessed it, I dropped my bag and the only things that came out and landed at the feet of the people sitting across from me were the two used FRER tests

I was mortified!

[Keta]

Oh the things LTTTC drives us to do.
On Monday after getting the BFN my brother (who had no idea I was even trying for a baby let alone having difficulties) tried to take my photo. When he didn't listen to my know I ranted and raved about respect and then left in a huff. Only to have to apologise for the scene later. Ooops

[myturn]

oh Keta, it's so nice to see you trying to find the lighter side of the situation - they really are some beaut stories!!

My lighter moments have not been as dramatic as yours but I will share to try and help us all remember the sanity....

When I had my lap last year I remembered going into surgery and thinking - omg, the room is full of men... when waking up to a room full of women - and being SERIOUSLY freaked out by it :-) totally disorienting.

So the most current cycle I started having my u/s on day 8 - which was a friday - and had to go M, W, F the next week and then M, W the one after that.... felt like the nurse recognised my "clacker" more than me... and I think I even said something along the lines of "oh we'll be best friends by the end of it" then wanted to slap myself with even more embarassment than what I was trying to cover in the first place.
When I started taking my orgaultran I was telling a friend about the next step had started and the good news was that I was now "stabbing myself in the guts twice a day"
I had bruises all over my belly, and for some reason this amused me....

Lying on the bed for EPU, and a young nurse or technician or whomever he was, was casually keeping my calm by stroking my leg, and I remember thinking... you're being nice to me because you get to see my girly bits for the next half an hour.... LMAO, of course my bits are SOO beautiful he just had to be gawking. clearly my 110kg frame is NOT that desirable... lmao

And seriously talking to the nurse about DH's need to ejaculate and then abstain for the next 2 days was just weird... especially when I then asked if we could have sex..... and did it matter what time today we did it.....

I was annoyed that my little free (but not so free, cause I'm paying a fortune for this) cooler bag, had a dodgey zip... and I was too chicken to ask for a new one... seriously - I can throw my legs in the air and show my bits for the world to see, have some strange man poke and prod around down there with a sheet over me, with a whole in the middle of it, so he can access all areas clearly.... but I can't ask for a replacement cooler bag????

speaking of which... I was lying there looking at the mirror, trying to work out the angle of where DH was sitting to see whether he could see up my "clacker" from his angle..... well.. anything to keep your mind occupied right.... and I wondered why the doc didn't cover up his nice shirt and pants.... cause what if he got "stuff" all over them..... what stuff was I thinking would spew out of me???

so now I'm sticking some creaming white s$#t up my 'clacker', which turns into some weird wet tissuey substance - we haven't done the dance for over two weeks and he goes overseas on friday.... so it will be another two weeks after that.... surely it will have grown over by then!! we haven't had this long a break EVER in our relationship..... just weird.....

but somehow.... it makes me laugh.... cause really who ever thought it was going to be this way!!

[myturn]

oh N2L - I can't help but - you poor thing!!

BTW - sorry about the long winded post... didn't realise it would end up that way... just got carried away!

[Keta]

Myturn and N2L you have literally had me laughing out loud. Thank you so much!!! I really needed that. It feels so good to laugh and try to find the lighter side in all this and you know what my cooler bag had a brocken strap - Im not sure who was less impressed me or DH.

[nothing2lose]

Lol - no problems. AND I have several free cooler bags you can have

[myturn]

Keta, I am sure your brother will understand that we all have bad days - whether you decide to tell him why or not, you're his sister - and he'll get that something is up - appreicate your apology, and it will be all over again.



I must admit, that was quite therapeutic.... think we should keep track of all those "you just gotta laugh" moments, to reflect and giggle over when the going gets tough. Thankyou ladies xox

so while I'm thinking positive, I think bedsies is calling me

speak soon

[myturn]

they give you another cooler bag!!!!!!

does that mean they give you another puregon pen as well!??!

Think I'd prefer a discount.....

[nothing2lose]

I have about five cooler bags and a fridge full of leftover drugs.

[Lisa B]

okay a couple of my lighter moments from TTC:

* I could never give myself the injections. I was a bridesmaid for my sister (who is a nurse). At the reception we went into the ladies room and I hitched up my bridesmaid dress whilst the bride gave me the injection. Would have made an interesting photo!

* Before I knew who was who in the zoo, I told the receptionist too many details about bleeding and described how much blood had landed in my knickers. I thought the receptionist was a nurse.

* When we were doing the 'timed' thing the receptionist rang me and told me it was time for a 'treatment'.

* Also when using OPKs I read that you got the best reading at 2pm so I would do them at work by doing a wee in a specimen cup and then would go to the car and dip the stick in. I was always emptying my wee in the work car park. I had ovulation problems but clearly I was a bit obsessive about the OPK testing!!!

[Keta]

So glad I'm not the only one having these 'just have to laugh moments'! I feel little more normal.

[Marley&Me]

All my friends freak out about pap-smears and anything 'invasive' and I just have to laugh. One friend who is about 23 has NEVER had a pap-smear! She is too scared! When I tell them about all the times I have had dildo cam and various other things they almost fall over. They sound like such prudes

[nothing2lose]

Lol Tasha, I reckon I have had 5454754586675543 dildo cams!

[Marley&Me]

Lol Tasha, I reckon I have had 5454754586675543 dildo cams!

Good old dildo cams, and what about arms that look you have a drug habit. I showed up at work a few times with bruising from BT and i was so paranoid!

Good to share a laugh tonight......

[myturn]

lol @ Tasha

I was one of those women who had never had a Pap Smear -- it had been mentioned in terms of -- yeah you need to do one, but I was 29 years old before finally a Dr said.... I can do it now if you want.... no, yes, no, yes.... okay....

If I only knew the number of times I would have to expose myself to strangers - The... OMG I just HAVE to see a female Dr... would be laughed at now... 5 years later - I really don't care anymore - it feels weird.... and seems like I should be SO uncomfortable, but I don't think I am anymore. still... the 10 years I put the pap smear off now seems so funny.

I'm sure at 23 I would have been shocked at all the invasiveness of it all... I was still a student and lived at home until I was 26.... all of this was SO far into my future... if only I'd known it would be so hard....

[Keta]

Oh I have the addict arms too! And when I told DH what they planned to do with the dildo cam I think he nearly fainted. My nan used to say when you get pregnant leave your dignity at the door. For us its when your ttc. Who would have thought so many people would know the ins ad outs of your baby making when you first started! lol

[myturn]

is it weird that everytime I have the dildo cam stuck up me I compare it to DH bits???

(or maybe I shouldn't admit to that.... )