thread: Trying for 2nd child - assisted LT TTC.

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Aug 2008
    Brisbane, QLD
    161

    Trying for 2nd child - assisted LT TTC.

    I joined BB in 2008 when I was going through IVF to conceive my first child, but I have been on her very speradically since, and mainly just having a look around.

    I have a history of endo with a BFP on our second cycle of IVF. We are now trying to conceive a second child, trying naturally first for 6 months (till our 'frostie' payment is due), then will probably look into IVF again. It has surprised me that all my old emotions of TTC have come back so strongly (we tried for 5 years before falling), and I'm anxious about taking this journey again. I so strongly want another baby, but I also feel silly for having these emotions because I have a happy, healthy almost 2 year old. We had a very positive IVF experience with our doctors, and I'd be happy to go through that again, but it is an emotional and very expensive journey (the cost has just over doubled since conceiving in Feb 2009).

    Anyway - just wanted to post again to re-introduce myself, and to see if anyone else has had any experience with subsequent pregnancies.

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jul 2006
    Melbourne
    4,895

    Welcome back to BB!

    I do get the feeling of the ttc journey - whether or not you got a healthy bub in the end isn't really the issue is it? I know that after two m/c, we got our natural pg, healthy DD but when ttc # 2, all those emotions of the hard part to get a healthy bub come flooding back & it still does from time to time (we are still ttc # 2 and starring down the barrell of IVF), so I get it! ((hugs))

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Apr 2008
    Melbourne
    167

    Hi bub4me. I had the same emotions when we started trying for #2. Perhaps i was even more emotional because i thought that i should be enjoying my DS rather than focusing on treatment! I found TTC the second time around no easier emotionally than the first time, because of such a strong desire to give DS a sibling, so What you are feeling sounds perfectly normal to me! The only thing that has been different is that since being pregnant, its definitely less stressful than the first time, for me at least. Good luck sweetie..

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Apr 2009
    Melbourne
    69

    me too

    Yep, me too. Glad to see this post today, it was exactly what I was looking for. My 1st bub took 3 years of trying and 10 ivf cycles. Now I'm trying for no 2 and, for some stupid reason, had hoped it would be easier. I mean, I deserve it right? I think I sort of hoped it would happen naturally, then hoped it would be faster when we resorted to IVF but no. I'm sick of watching my money go down a very empty drain but really do want a second bub. I've found it a bit easier than the first time but still so very disappointing when it doesn't work. We have all the old difficulties of trying to plan our life when I don't know if I will be pregnant in a month or two years or never again. Anyway, it's nice to vent to people who really understand.

  5. #5
    Random Act of Kindness Recipient
    Add Baby Dreamtime on Facebook

    Jul 2008
    Gold Coast
    692

    Me too . First time trying took me 4.5 years. Second time around I had hoped it would be easier but already we have been trying 13 months, and now with two mc thrown in I am almost finding it harder. The emotions are certainly just as strong But we will all keep trying yes? And fingers crossed it is just around the corner. Xx

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Aug 2008
    Brisbane, QLD
    161

    Thank you all so much for your comments and support. I have read them, and appreciate them. I hope to get to know you as we go further down this journey together. I will post again soon, but wanted to jump on quickly before I run out the door, to say thank you - It's nice to feel I'm not going going through this alone. Sending positive and happy vibes to all of you!

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Aug 2008
    Brisbane, QLD
    161

    Me too - particularly happy thoughts to you. I'm glad this post was what you were looking for, and hope I can help in your journey too. Thinking of you lots!

  8. #8
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2006
    Coburg -Melbourne
    655

    I'm in here with you all too! I am trying for no3 with IVF again and truly thought I would be quite chilled about the whole thing ( I've made it there eventually twice already - surely ther's one more in this old body!). I was very relaxed for the first attempt but after two failures and in the the midst of another FET which is not going so well, I too, can feel all those horrid emotions flooding back just like before.
    No 1 is always hard because of the unknown worries like -"can I even get pg?", "can my body carry to term?" but I do actually think I was the most desperate and despondant trying for no 2. I knew what it was like to grow a life and to love a child so much and I was just desperate to have that again. Plus totally heart-set on providing a sibling for no1Don't let anybody tell you "at least you have one" "be grateful for what you have".... blah...blah..blah. Famlies who have to endure IVF are no less entitled to wanting more children than anybody else. I am sure all of us are totally aware of how lucky we are to have the child/ren we already have but this doesn't mean we should be excempt from wanting or being capaable of loving another equally.

    BUb4me and all the other lovely ladies in here - I wish you all the best on this journey - may it be brief and successful for all of us!