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Thread: TTC & Taking Clomid &/or Metformin ~ December 06 #2

  1. #73

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    Oh BW...

    I so agree with you about the support from BB...it's extraordinary...I too, don't know where I would be without it...

    I really don't understand how some people can be so insensitive...and the fact she is a therapist...that is such an awful thing for that woman to say...and does she think her comment will reduce that stress? Mind baffling!

    I so hope you can enjoy your much deserved holidays...

    Take care chickie!



    And by the way...I think there's a whole lot of us here who would attempt to hijack and kidnap you if you did try to leave!!!

    You have been a major source of support and compassion to me...and many others. You're willingness to investigate , explore and be vigilant in understanding fertility issues is admirable...I just can't wait to see that being rewarded!!!

  2. #74

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    Ugh! I'm going to have to stop reading tonight, otherwise I'm never going to stop crying! I think I'm just completely strung out emotionally - so saying all those lovely things about me is just beautiful, but it's really getting the tears going tonight!

    On a slightly sillier note (perhaps because it's the end of the year), I feel a bit like I'm reading a report comment there, Monnie!

    DH is trying to talk me into eating dinner (yes, even at 10pm!), but I'm mostly just looking forward to taking my meds and going to bed... I think I'm going to have to take some mersyndol to help myself relax enough to sleep properly tonight.

    I think what's making it all worse tonight is knowing that Christmas is coming... I would always get so excited about Christmas, and would feel just like a little kid again! But now... it's just really bringing into sharp focus the enormous empty hole in my life and in my heart. I'm sure you all know how it feels.

    BW

  3. #75

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    Princess - Can't wait to hear how your scan goes next week. It will be good to give you some peace of mind heading into Christmas. How exciting that you and monnie are going to be belly buddies!!!

    Kate - I hope you don't get sick of reading all those books too quickly I have so many different books on fertility/pregnancy that I get sick at looking at them, because they don't tell me how exactly to really get the BFP IYKWIM. If only we could fall pregnant from reading about it LOL

    BW - My FS also laughed at my charts, but I still insisted on taking them to each appointment and handing her a copy. She knew to look forward to them in the end She also said that I shouldn't bother doing my temps as it is probably adding stress. So I did stop temping after a few months, mainly because I started having nightmares about bugs crawling all over my BBT and me putting it in my mouth half-asleep, and so I freaked myself out LOL So in the end it did stress me.

    Your FS probably doesn't want to make any promises about where to go from here until he has done all the tests for himself to see what he thinks. You know what these doctors are like. I'm sure he will be better next time he sees you, once he has reviewed everything. But if he tells you to give up BB tell him to get stuffed :P I hope you have gone to bed and have a good nights rest, and keep away from your DH for a few days

  4. #76
    emmydee Guest

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    Princess -- CONGRATULATIONS!!!! I'm so excited for you! Sending lots and lots of sticky vibes your way!!!!

    Missbelinda -- oh my gosh, I laughed out loud reading about your nightmare about your BBT!!!

    BW -- That sounds tough with all those options. You know, my friend was trying for months, when they found out that her DH had variocole, and they were told they would need IVF. She also has PCOS. He went in for the surgery. They were told that they wouldn't see results for 6 months, so they were taking a break. Well, just 2 months after the surgery, wham! she was pregnant. Totally surprised. So I do know the surgery works for some people. I'm not suggesting it for you. I just don't understand why your FS is so sure that it would be a waste of time.

    As for being stressed, it is totally normal! You could go into denial, and just forget about it, but I think you should go after what you want. It sound to me like you are doing a FABULOUS job, and doing everything right! But, of course, if you can reduce the stress, that would be great too (if you figure out how, let me know!). Personally, I think talking to the ladies on this thread HELPS reduce the stress. I know I'm pretty new to this thread, but you guys have been amazing, and such a comfort to me.

    And I need it too! AF came today at 17 dpo! :neutral: I feel okay though. Yesterday was awful cuz I was in limbo, and my hopes were up. Now, I'm like allrightie, let's just move on.

  5. #77

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    Emmydee - Sorry that AF turned up *hugs*.

  6. #78

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    BW, I honestly think in a few days you'll be feeling much better. You just need to take the time to process all of the info you've been given. I felt completely overwhelmed after my first FS visit and was also in tears for most of the afternoon. I'd gone in there hoping to have a chat with him and see what he though of our situation and came out with completed admission forms for another surgery - NOT what I was expecting.

    As for whether or not your DH should have surgery - I have friends who found themselves in a similar situation. In this case it was her who was contemplating surgery (a lap for suspected endo, she also has PCOS and one blocked tube). After all the initial testing etc and finding out that they had problems on both sides (her DH had a few issues with his SA) their FS left the option to them - put yourself thru this surgery, the pain, the expense, the time off work etc etc and hope that it makes a difference. At the end of the day, it may not, considering the other problems you both have. Or, go straight to IVF, cut out all of the waiting, hoping, wishing in between and know that you'll have a great chance at success. With so many issues to work around, this is the option they chose. She's now 21 weeks pregnant. It only took her about 10 weeks to achieve this pregnancy (she did one stim cycle, BFN, then did a FET the next month and fell prg).

    I guess what I am trying to say is I'd wait until all your test results are in and see where you both stand. If there are too many issues to address and work around, it may be better for you both to go straight to IVF and not worry about DH's surgery. I obviously haven't done as much research on the varicocele issue as you have, but I have read lots of women's experiences where their DH's surgery hasn't improved their chances of fertility at all. Perhaps this has been the experience of your FS and that is why he has recommended leaving it, considering that you also have some fertility issues?

    On that note, I agree with Monnie. I was a bit iffy with my FS the first time I saw him. I really think you need to give this Dr at least a second chance before you come to any conclusions. I love my FS, he is just awesome, but in my opinion, how well they do their job is far more important than their bedside manner. You just want him to 'get the job done' and get you prg, not be your friend.

    Anyway, I hope after all that rambling I have helped somewhat! LOL!!

    Also - big congrats to Princess!! Well done. Hoping you have a very healthy and happy prg.

    Emmydee, sorry AF turned up, I had a similar experience this month (longer than normal cycle) and it sucked the big ones when she finally turned up. A few days later now and I'm feeling much better.
    Last edited by Willow; December 15th, 2006 at 08:02 AM.

  7. #79

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    Butterfly big big from me...

    There were a few things that were said that disturbed me and only you on reflection can know if you like this guy. Liking him, respecting him and growing trust in him is very important as you will have a journey together. Having said that, sometimes these things come with time. Only you will be the judge of that.

    You do seem quite stressed out. Fertility issues by their very nature are very stressful. You would be a super human not to be. What you need is some practical ways to deal with that. I really think that finding some ways to deal with your anxiety could be a real benefit. Have you tried yoga? I find it wonderful, but there are many other techniques and therapies that can help.
    However, I am quite uncomfortable with statements that "you will never get pregnant if you are so stressed"... That's a big call.

    I also am not sure why he is debating your husbands repair. Did you press him for further information?

    Fertility specialists deal with couples who have been LTTC every day. Compassion and understanding is paramount. I am sorry that your charting was sniffed at. Charting can be a useful tool. However, I too think it can become a bit of a focus... However, so can opk's or whatever. When you are on this journey "doing" something can feel at least like you can be a little proactive.

    Butterfly I would really take some time to process the information and see how it all sits. I would also suggest that you make an appointment with DR S. Sweetie, this is too big to put into the hands of someone that is seeming so flippant. That was a big statement from me - so I hope that it is okay to say that...

    Love to everyone else...

  8. #80

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    I'm feeling a bit better about things this morning... I think last night I was just completely overwhelmed and was desperately missing the time I needed to process everything. Note to self: crowded shopping centres are NOT the best place to be after medical appointments!

    Intellectually, I'm quite aware that I've over-reacted and misinterpreted a lot of things... I'm not quite worked through things enough to figure out exactly how I have, and what the correct interpretation should be.

    When it comes to why he said the varicocele repair would be a waste of time - he handed us a paper from the Cochrane collaboration which went through and summarised the findings of a heap of studies on varicocele repairs and pregnancy rates. The summary there is that in couples with otherwise unexplained infertility that varicocele repairs do not improve pregnancy rates. There's a lot of stuff in the paper that I just don't have the medical background to understand, but I am left thinking that we don't have otherwise unexplained infertility, and aything that improves things on either side should be worth a shot! I'll chat to my acupuncturist this evening, and we'll certainly be asking more questions next appointment, and more questions of DH's specialist when we go see him (16th of Jan)

    I am going to give him another go... I know I was feeling really quite stressed on the day, and couldn't really cope with him questioning me directly - I really wanted to hide behind DH! But I also recall not really liking my rheumy on the first appointment and feeling like a right clod when I couldn't answer his questions (decribe the pain I'm feeling? It hurts, dammit! I block it out so I can get stuff done, and now you want me to think about it?! It moves, it changes, it's never the same! I can't describe it!), and now I love him to bits and wouldn't ever dream of switching to another rheumy.

    From the way he questioned me at the end of the appointment, I'm pretty sure he picked up that I'm a bit of a control freak... and that this stuff being so far out of my control is damned scary. But I don't think he realised that if I can't control I need to understand, and that helps to reduce the stress of me not being able to control things.

    I've been sitting here staring at this post for the last few minutes - and I just can't get my current thoughts and feelings into words. I guess that where I am right now is better than last night, but still a lot of thinking, processing and just general pondering to happen on top of what has already taken place.

    BW

  9. #81

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    BW, I agree with what Deb has said also. If after some reflection you decide you really dislike this guy, then it's just not going to work. I still think you should give him a second chance though and get all your results back, see what he has to say. Deb is right, sometimes it just takes time for the relationship and trust to build. It did with me.

    You will know the right thing to do for you.

  10. #82

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    I understand it can take some time to digest things. I hope it was okay for me to be so outspoken... I am thinking of you...

  11. #83

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    Princess – Congratulations! Lots and lots of Sticky Vibes coming your way.

    Ktgirl – How sweet of DH buying you all those books. Guess you will be very busy over the Christmas break.

    BW – So sorry that your appointment didn’t go as you hoped but I hope that once you have processed all the info and taken some time out to think about everything, you will feel lots better. I hope that your next appointment does go better and you do feel lots more comfortable with your FS. Oh and PLEASE PLEASE dont leave us. Also I have done the GTT and its not that bad except take a really good book/magazine because you have to sit there for two hours and cant move.

    missbelinda – LOL at your nightmare. ROFL

    emmydee – so sorry AF arrived. You will be a jazzy January chick with me.

  12. #84

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    Deb, it's perfectly ok for you to be so outspoken. I know that sometimes I need a swift kick in the rear and to be told to get my act in to gear, and I really value the friends in my life who love me enough to do that for me.

    I'm currently chatting to a friend in England who's science background is a lot more biological than mine, and she's helped me find some papers that do indicate that varicocele repair is an option.

    This doctor is going to find that two can play at the medical papers game!

    BW

  13. #85

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    Thats excellent BW that your friend can help you like that. You put that Dr in his place! LOL

  14. #86
    emmydee Guest

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    So BW, I'm kind of confused -- what was the end conclusion with your FS? He just wants you to make a decision about IVF and get back to him? I agree with the other girls. To just take it easy, get your mind off things, till you get your test results back...take one thing at a time... I keep jumping ahead of myself, but, when I'm reminded to take things one at a time, it's less stressful/ panicky then thinking ahead to all the potential future scenarios... it's hard to do tho...

    Right now, i'm taking a month break from clomid, and am really really hoping to just ovulate. I haven't ovulated on my own for over a decade. Went off BCP last Nov, and did not ovulate until August when I went on clomid. I'm hoping clomid may jump my system, and I'll start ovulating on my own. Anyone ever hear of that happening for someone???

  15. #87

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    Em,

    I o'ed on Met then went to clomid o'ed on that first time concieved, miscarried. then i had a 1 month break after that BUT i had my shortedt cycel ( natural) ever 31 days adn i o'ed on my own.

    so my answer is yes i believ the clomid helped my ovaries kick start!!

  16. #88

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    Emmydee, Yes! Sportychick had a similar situation to yours. She stopped BCP and then had a 100 day horror cycle which was ended with the aid of provera. She then did three clomid cycles without success, then as she was going to be away at O time took a break from clomid and ovulated on her own. On her second natural cycle she conceived. So it certainly can happen!

    Sorry for the confusion! There's to be no decision made regarding IVF or no IVF just yet. For now, we're having tests and gathering information (I really should book that GTT!) and things will be discussed further when we return to the specialist.

    While the cochrane collaboration paper (2004) we were given indicates that there's no use in repairing varicoceles, an american paper we've found indicates that varicocele repair is definitely useful if various conditions are met - the varicocele can be felt on external examination (it is), the couple has known infertility (we do), the male has an abnormal semen analysis (he does), and the female has either normal fertility (ha!) or a treatable cause of infertility (hopefully!). I guess it all comes down to what the tests show... if I'm going to need IVF anyway, then we may as well just leave the varicocele and do that... but if I can be made to ovulate in a sensible, predictable fashion, then it seems there is a point to having the varicocele repair done.

    All I can say is thank God for medical/scientific friends! It's the whole knowledge is power thing - I'm educating myself about the situation and thus gaining power over it. I still can't change anything, but just KNOWING about it is making me feel so much better and less stressed.

    BW

  17. #89

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    I am so glad Butterfly. You are absolutely right. Knowledge is power and this does release stress too.

  18. #90
    emmydee Guest

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    Thanks! That makes me feel better knowing that there's hope that I'll ovulate on my own. It's a little depressing tho, just sitting back and doing nothing... oh well...

    BW -- According to my friend, and also my mum who is a doctor, the variocole repair is a pretty, minor straightforward surgery. Now that my friend is preggo, I don't think her husband is going in to the doctor for a follow up to see if the surgery helped or not. I wish he would tho, cuz that would be interesting to know... But it must of worked if she got preggo. He had a REALLY low sperm count, and had severely twisted varicoceles on both testicles. Anyway, I don't want to sound like I'm advocating the varicocele repair surgery, because I'm not -- just want to pass on information that I heard.

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