Working Mummies Support Group #2

**Jaycee** · May 22nd, 2014, 01:40 PM

I'm not one for socialising either Astrid, so I feel your pain. I'm also in a company that has had numerous redundancies over the past couple of years, and it doesn't appear to be over. DH also works for the same company so it gets scary sometimes to think we could both be out of a job!

On a personal note, I'm really struggling to cope with the work/life balance thing at the moment. I work 4 days a week, with a 1 hour commute each way by the time I drop the boys off to school / childcare, or my mum's who is wonderful and has my boys 3 days out of the 4! I'm out of the house a minimum of 10 hours a day, sometimes u to 12, and that's tough on me and my beautiful boys.

I'm alway time poor, when I get home the priority is dinner and showers for the boys. Most weeks I forget to help DS1 with his reading/homework at least 1 or 2 days a week, that makes me feel like the world's worst mum because his education should be my number one priority! I struggle with the housework, DS1 is always sad on OHSC days (but is always happy when I pick him up, it's just getting him there that's the problem). I hate being so far away from DS1 when he's at school and I'm at work

Well, that feels a little better getting this off my chest. I've been desperately looking for a job closer to home with more suitable hours, however' they're very scarce and when the opportunities come up, the market is flooded with applicants.

**MummyNaomi** · May 22nd, 2014, 11:08 PM

I'm also in a company that has had numerous redundancies over the past couple of years, and it doesn't appear to be over. DH also works for the same company so it gets scary sometimes to think we could both be out of a job.

Same Jaycee, except I am being made redundant and eventually it's likely my DH will too. It's becoming more and more obvious the company we work for has no plans to keep a presence in Adelaide, I just hope I get sorted with a new job before DH is impacted.

**MummyNaomi** · May 24th, 2014, 11:02 PM

Okay, so I've decided to take control of an uncontrollable situation. There is an internal role going that I would be perfect for. Its the same pay, doing core hours, no longer managing people (this is appealing to me) and its more of a project/campaign role - lots of analysis, developing campaigns, engaging staff to deliver etc etc - my forte and stuff I'm brilliant at. It's at the same location I currently am, but its full time. Being that I've just gone full time until the redundancy kicks in and the reality of finding a part time gig externally paying the money I currently earn is low, its a compromise I can deal with. While I know that there is risk of future redundancy a few years down the track, it potentially gives me security and flexibility in the interim until my youngest starts school, no long commute, family friendly hours, with the potential for work from home opportunities (some of this team already do this part of the time). Project and non customer facing roles have a higher likelihood of redundancy, but if I was made redundant in a few years time, I'd be no worse off than I am now. AND I'd have a whole new skill set and experience to add to my resume! All of a sudden I'm excited again.

Based on where we are in our life now, family/work life balance is a very high priority, this gives me the opportunity to maintain that. The negative - It means more childcare hours for DD which isn't ideal, but being that I am right across the road and our commute is only 10 mins its minimised as much as possible.

Applications close Monday. My cover letter and resume is done, just getting it proof read etc before submitting and have emailed the Manager of this role hoping to catch up Monday for a coffee to chat about the role..... Wish me luck!!

**wysiwyg** · May 25th, 2014, 08:01 AM

Good luck MN - sounds like great opportunity. As you know I have thought about going full-time - and if I could find a role only 10 mins away it would become a favorable
option - especially once only have one in child care. I know several people who have done what you are proposing, getting made redundant and then moving to another role within the company - and it is worked out well for all of them (some have been made redundant further down the line but that has still been ok for them).

**Astrid** · May 25th, 2014, 09:26 AM

Good Luck MN. Sounds like it could work well for you.

**Kazbah** · May 25th, 2014, 06:31 PM

Hi ladies

wow ... gotta love outsourcing don't you (although my company calls it out-tasking).

MN - good luck. I hope you get the short commute.

Astrid - socialising sux.

Jaycee - the commute sux does'nt it. I find that I'm ok with the commute, but the kids and DH aren't. Doh.

Me - still waiting for them to finish all the interviews to see if I make the next round. In the meantime, I've been "peeled" across to another manager, which means I get to concentrate on my passion

for the moment. Hoping to hear soon if I get the next round of interviews. AEGH!!!!!!!!

**wysiwyg** · May 25th, 2014, 09:37 PM

I suspect after first day in new job tomorrow I will be joining the 'commuting sux' club - but as I have low expectations of the commute it can only be better than expected - maybe it will mean I have to buy myself a folding bike! :-)

Need to get myself back into 'work' mode - but tonight have been too annoyed by our dumb neighbors - hopefully a cup of chamomile tea - will chill me out.

**Teeki** · May 25th, 2014, 10:00 PM

Good luck for your first day tomorrow wysiwyg!

And good luck with your application MN, it sounds like a good change.

I'm already dreading my return to work, I'm in a bit of a fragile mood tonight, and the thought that only 8 Sundays from now I'll be needing to prepare for work the next day has me in tears. It's hard to enjoy the time I do have left when I'm so against going back to work. Depending on what I end up doing, the job itself may not be so bad. But you've written about the guilt perfectly Jaycee, our mornings will be so rushed to get us all ready and out the door, and on bad days I don't get home til 7 - that's bed time. Then I spend the evenings cleaning up and getting lunches/bags etc ready for the next day. I truly hate our lifestyle when I'm working.

Anyway, whinge over. I guess I'm going to have to master my time management skills.

**sahbear** · May 25th, 2014, 10:22 PM

Good luck MN!!

**Jaycee** · May 26th, 2014, 10:05 AM

Good luck for your first day tomorrow wysiwyg!

And good luck with your application MN, it sounds like a good change.

I'm already dreading my return to work, I'm in a bit of a fragile mood tonight, and the thought that only 8 Sundays from now I'll be needing to prepare for work the next day has me in tears. It's hard to enjoy the time I do have left when I'm so against going back to work. Depending on what I end up doing, the job itself may not be so bad. But you've written about the guilt perfectly Jaycee, our mornings will be so rushed to get us all ready and out the door, and on bad days I don't get home til 7 - that's bed time. Then I spend the evenings cleaning up and getting lunches/bags etc ready for the next day. I truly hate our lifestyle when I'm working.

Anyway, whinge over. I guess I'm going to have to master my time management skills.

hun, wish I could make you feel better, just know you're not alone, and you're doing the best you can. Try to enjoy the time you have left xxx

**wysiwyg** · May 26th, 2014, 07:53 PM

Well first day was good, commute better than expected about 50 mins each way - still keen on the folding bike though. Am working with mainly women for the first time in my life (several of whom are part-time) - I think that might help with my issue with totally disconnecting from family while at work, as there was plenty of talk of children. Might mean I need to update my wardrobe though - what I could get away with in a windowless room full of sweaty male geeks might not work so well here, judging by outfits I saw today - I haven't bought any new clothes in years and my mum kept nagging me when she was here - so maybe it is time and this might be enough of a nudge.

Can get decent free coffee - a big plus!

The rush this morning didn't seem too bad today - and tomorrow is not a work day - so a nice gentle intro really.

**MummyNaomi** · May 26th, 2014, 08:37 PM

Glad to hear it went well wysiwyg, and decent free coffee - yay! Definitely go shopping! I have been thinking I need to update my work wardrobe, its sadly unfashionable LOL

Job Application in, The Hiring Manager wasn't available today but I will catch up with her tomorrow for a brief catch up, just want to introduce myself properly and maximise my chances of getting an interview

Teeki - Hugs Honey, I remember that feeling prior to returning to work from maternity leave, I felt that way with both my kiddies, and its quite devastating and consuming. I'd often rock them to sleep knowing in a few weeks I'd be at work missing out on that

Be kind to yourself, I found that the actual reality of returning to work was easier than I had it in my head both times, so that made it easier.

**wysiwyg** · May 27th, 2014, 02:50 PM

Talking of rushing etc. Is it only me that finds articles like the one on here - Morning Mayhem about tips to avoid morning mayhem by Pinky McKay highly irritating - suggesting that in the hour or less between 6:00 and 7:00 where I have to get washed, showered and dressed, (DH too) eat breakfast, get the kids ready to leave for daycare at 7:15 - not sure I can squeeze in a bit of yoga, or a walk to greet the day :-)

there is no excuse to prop them in front of the television (except for weekend ‘lay-ins’ – video hire was invented for parental respite under exceptional circumstances!)

- so it is fine if you need a lay-in on the weekend - but not if you need it to stop them wreaking havoc and disturbing the neighbors while you are in the shower so can go to work!

I would prefer ideas on quick snacks they can have prior to their proper breakfast at daycare (like bananas) or tips on how you persuade three year olds to put on their socks. Or convincing 5 year olds it is not the time for drawing etc :-)

**Astrid** · May 27th, 2014, 06:35 PM

umm, yeah that article, whilst well meaning is not that practical in reality (well for my family).

I don't like making lunches the night before, anything cut loses nutrients. Ok with making ahead and freezing, but I find things like carrot sticks, or cut fruit just does not turn out nice by the middle of the day. Anything like leftovers, which DH and I eat, is a bit different, as that is usually reheated, but the kids food is quite a different matter.

I thankfully don't have to get up till 7am, so if I want to, I get up earlier to exercise. Thankfully the girls tends to sleep through that.

TV does go on. I don't like it of a morning, but DH does and of course the girls do. I find if they really drag things out of a morning, the threat of losing TV will generally pull them back into line. After one threat, the following morning DD1 got dressed straight away, got her own breakfast and was ready well before anyone else!

**Jaycee** · May 27th, 2014, 08:04 PM

Well, I've finally had some luck come my way! I've been offered a job, permanent part time 25 hours per week, 15 hours in the office and 10 from home. The 15 hours are to be done over 3 days, the other 10 whenever I feel like it! DH and I discussed it at length tonight and I'm accepting the offer!

I'm so excited and nervous at the same time, I've been working for the same company for almost 9 years so it's a bit of a risk for us, but definitely one that will be a huge benefit to our family if it works out! Woohoo!

**Mother Goose** · May 27th, 2014, 08:50 PM

Fantastic Jaycee! Congratulations!

**wysiwyg** · May 27th, 2014, 10:18 PM

Great news Jaycee! Very exciting - the 15 over three days especially seems good, not having to do a 7.5 hour day in the office seems particularly useful to me.

**wysiwyg** · May 27th, 2014, 10:29 PM

umm, yeah that article, whilst well meaning is not that practical in reality (well for my family).

I don't like making lunches the night before, anything cut loses nutrients. Ok with making ahead and freezing, but I find things like carrot sticks, or cut fruit just does not turn out nice by the middle of the day. Anything like leftovers, which DH and I eat, is a bit different, as that is usually reheated, but the kids food is quite a different matter.

I thankfully don't have to get up till 7am, so if I want to, I get up earlier to exercise. Thankfully the girls tends to sleep through that.

TV does go on. I don't like it of a morning, but DH does and of course the girls do. I find if they really drag things out of a morning, the threat of losing TV will generally pull them back into line. After one threat, the following morning DD1 got dressed straight away, got her own breakfast and was ready well before anyone else!

Today seems to be the day for annoying me on this type of thing - just went to a talk on 'School Readiness' organised by the council by someone who is well known in that arena (KW) - that was so geared towards sessional kinder and people staying at home until child goes to school - I clearly live in the wrong council area.

I was also very annoyed that she kept equating school with "the end of childhood" - childhood does not end when school starts, there are still many years of fun filled childhood ahead - putting that idea into parents heads all the time, is not going to do their children any favors at all.