Sylvia, that brought a little tear to my eye. and I hope it doesn;t bring you too much grief if I share a story with you.

I had the pleasure and honour of looking after an eight-year-old girl with leukaemia, who relapsed and sadly died. A fortnight before she died, she had yet to discuss it at all, and her parents had not been able to bring themselves to discuss it with her.
All of a sudden one day, during a ward round, she turned to her mother and said "Mum, after I die, I want you to lose weight." She turned to her dad and said "Dad, after I die, I want you to stop smoking." And she turned to her oncologist and said "Doctor, before I die, I want you to do the ward round in a nurses uniform.

She proceeded to plan, with her parents, both her "going away" party, so she could see all of her friends again, and her funeral. A few days later she was discharged.

A week and a half later, she woke up her mum and asked her to come and sleep with her. And in the early hours of the morning, wrapped up in her mother's arms, with the rain outside tapping on the window, she died peacefully.

Her father stopped smoking. Her mother has lost weight and to this day I believe has kept it off. And, the day before she was discharged, her doctor did do the entire ward round - a male doctor - in a female nurse's uniform. In full makeup.

When I die, that is the way I want it to be - at peace with myself, at peace with my family, warapped up in the arms of someone I love, with the rain outside tapping on my window. I can't even begin to put into words how much that experience, and the others I was privileged enough to share, have affected the way I look at life.

Life is far too short. Thank you, Silvia, for sharing your bittersweet story, and thank you to all of the people who have read this thread who will donate bone marrow, or be on the list to donate.