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Tiggy, thats right, I do feel like I need him to say its ok with him to have it done. He says if I do get it done, he will go get himself done. Dothe men need our say so to have it done, or was that just in the past.. It hurt. I feel like I'm his kid not his wife..
You echo how I am feeling 100%.
I don't know whether my DH would go to the same extreme though...
When I had them done, I was about 27, I'm now 33, our son was 10 months old, I think I should have waited till he was about 2. I thought I was pregnant last week. I was meant to my period on the 24 june but did'nt get it till 28, and had all the signs, sore boobs going to the toilet alot. Did a test and it was neg, so waited 2 more days and that test was neg. He knows how I feel but still says no. He's says that with the kids at school, we don't need baby sitter's, and HE could'nt go through night feeds and nappy changes, like he did it anyway..
I know what you mean, it's not as though they do all the hard work. What a shame you weren't pregnant...I live in hope that my ligation wasn't successful but I know that the doctor was very thorough :(
I am still going to work on DH because I regret having them done, did the minute the surgery was over and now that Ivy and Noah are getting older, find myself feeling really incomplete.
Yeas, it was and it is that same for me. I went to see a card reader in march, and she said that I would get a new job, the same as what I'm doing now bit in a diffrent building, she said it would happen in april, may, and I got it in may. And she said I would sign a contract in june and I did, she also said a baby in oct/nov, it would be a boy, he was coming from my partner I'm with now, but his spirt was from a baby I had in a past life from a great love I had.. So maybe it might happen.. LOL
I've always regretted having my tubes tied. I went from super fertile to infertile and even a reversal didn't change that sad fact. Every time I hear of someone wanting a ligation, I wonder if they are going to wish they hadn't done it some time in the future.
Like you, Tiff, I want another bub now I've had Charlie. I will need IVF again if I'm to fall pg again, which makes me even more p****d that I agreed to a ligation in the first place!
oh, i hope so. that would makew your man be quiet.
if it happened naturally, it was meant to be
Sush,
it was a terrible, stupid thing for me to do and i have regretted it every day.
but i felt such pressure from everyone, even though i felt it was wrong at the time.
their birth was such a big emergency, i didn't have time to stop and think. i wish i had:(
the worst part about it is i was too scared to say something.
I thought I wanted to have it done. My friend said I would regret it, and I did..She said that she could remember Rob saying it would be better 1 of each, and we could do more for them, so I had it done.. I needed a kick in the head..
that's how ifeel too a good hard kick to knock some sense into myself!
Aw Tiff, you poor thing. I too caved to pressure. My XH wanted me to have it, and even though I knew I wanted more children, he didn't, and kept saying, 'but we're going to be together forever, and I don't want anymore' Stupid me, I couldn't argue with that.
Except he's now my ex, and is still able to have kids without medical intervention. I heard after we split up that his gf fell pg and he made her go for an abortion. Life sucks sometimes huh?
Yeah, men think it's there way or the high way. And if you don't do what they want then it's hell for you. At one point I was really thinking about getting it done and not telling him. But I could'nt I love him to much to do that. But then I think, if he love's me as much as he say's he does he would give me chance..
I got my tubes done because my second son is autistic and thought I couldn't cope with another child plus him. DH had really bad post natal (yep him not me) and he begged me to get my tubes done. I woke up crying in recovery. I knew it was wrong, I hated him for so long and it put a rift in our relationship a bit. He knew it was killing me inside. I always wanted to chave a nother baby, wether it was a boy or a girl, I didn't care. He has since told me he regrets ever asking me to get my tubes done and has asked me to forgive him for it.
Thee is hope though girls, I fell pregnant 3 times with them done but quiet obviously I m/c. I feel the same as you all. It is VERY selfish for men to expect us to do this to ourselves when we know its not right for us. Good one the girls who are happy to be done but god I craved to have another baby from the time I woke up until I fell asleep. I still cant believe im here, 30 weeks pg now. Its taken me lots to get use to but I just cant wait. I hope that you guys will find your peace and I pray another baby.
xxmaz
So do I maz, but I know there is no hope for me..
It's really sad to see how many women regret having it done hey?
I felt exactly the same way.
At first I used AF as my excuse for wanting the reversal, Af was nasty & would last up to 2 weeks sometimes, I had horrific cramps, & would absolutely flood the first day, it was a real nightmare. But when I told DH I would love another baby & having the op done would be a bonus he was thrilled!! & AF was so much better afterwards too.
I know it's wrong to fib to hubby's but have you ever thought of telling him it's because AF is so bad you need it done?:rolleyes: (norty me, but that's what I had intended on doing, but guilt got the better of me.) I guess I was lucky to find DH felt the same way.
You shouldn't let yourselves be tormented like this for the sake of keeping some one else happy, it is your body, it is your right.
:eek: Maz 30 weeks??
I have told him my AF is bad. Have told him that the first 2 days are really bad and like u I flood, and the cramps get bad to. But he don't want to listen to me. And I'm scared of telling him about getting it done for free, cos he will just yell and scream..
Oh that's no good rttj2000, how would he like it if it was happening to him?
Wow, I just got my first AF after Ivy and Noah were born and I have bled and bled. I didn't know it could have something to do with the ligation!
I'm into week two now and am still bleeding. Interesting.
tiggy, if the bleeding keep's going for another week, go see your Doc, and see what he has to say..
I don't know storm, because he's not the sort of guy that show's how he feel's. I think if I was to tell him about getting it done for free it would'nt make any diff. I had'nt had AF for about 3 months a few years ago, and when his mum ask what was wrong, I said nothing and then his dad said what u got r r**s 1 word I hate, and I said no have'nt had it for 3 month's, and they both said at the same time you better not pregnant. First time my DH stood up for me, and said that he did'nt want any more kids, but if it was to happen then we will deal with it, and told them to stay out of it..
Tiggy I hope it is just a long one being the first time after the birth.Having nightmare Af is the pits!! Dr's just kept teling me it was hormonal WTF I know it wasn't!! Hope it is not going to happen to you!!
Rttj2000 I just dont understand your DH!!!!!!!!!!
Neither do I storm. He know's how bad I want to have another, and it's really hurting not being able to. But that's him, I think he get's it of his parents. His mum said that if she could re-live her life, she would never have gotten married and had kid's, now that's selfish..
God rttj200 - are you sure your man really loves you. sorry but he sound's very selfcentered. relationship is about compromise and it seems from what yourve told us its all one sided, your doing everything for him but what is he doing fo ryou in return. he should feel loved and respected that you are willing to have another child with you. it only proves how much you love him, stop giving mate. you don't want to be old and grey and full of regret mate and thinking about what could have been.
Had a really **** week so far. Nikolaus went to kinder with a beautiful little boy and im friendly with his mum. well we all got the news that the little boy drowned in a dam on a farm on sunday night. I just cant believe he's gone. Nikolaus is upset about the whole thing and to top it of the funeral is on saturday, the day before NIkolaus' 6th birthday. So it's been a crapper so far.
I so cant believe ive hit 30 weeks now. I cant walk far or fast any more and the mattress tango is starting to become an obstical course. My next check up is on the 17th.
How many weeks ar eyou now Storm? 12? I just feel like its flying now. Heaps of Braxton hicks and my god this girl can kick.
better go and stuff my face before I feel sick again
xxmaz
**** Maz, I heard about that little boy on the news!! Geez I hope Nikolaus is OK.
Yep just passed 12 weeks now, had my OB visit on Monday, long & boring, have the NT scan next Monday, he said I have 1:350 chance :eek: scarey. Made my booking appointment at the hospital too!! I guess it's official now.
It's so hard trying to get some action in towards the end hey he he he seems like we go with out for such along time !!
Oh at the BH's, soon they will be for real!! Yikes 10 weeks to go!!!
Hi maz, yes it feels like its all about him, most of the time. Says he loves me and would'nt do anything to stuff it up, but yeas I do feel like I'm 1 of the kid's and not his wife. Some times I wish I could just shake the **** out of him. He does'nt truly understand how I feel, even though he says he does.. Hope your son feels better soon, it's not nice knowing your son is so sad and there's not much you can do.. Big Hugs for him..
Maz, I am sorry to hear about your sons friend. Boy has the time flown by for you.
Storm, 12 weeks already it seems like yesterday that you said you were pregnant.
rttj2000, I am sorry that partner is not listening to you and how you truely feel. I hope that you will be able to.
Tiff, hello and I know exactly how you feel.
Sushee, I cant believe that Charlie is nearly 3 months old.
I have made some inquires with Royal Women Hospital and I am in the process of getting all the test that need to be done. I am seeing my gyna on 19 July. I will be so happy when I have got the ball rolling on this.
It is definately amazing the number of women that have tubal ligations that regret it afterward. I believe that they should give women counsilling before having it done and also not doing it when having a casear. I wrote a letter to the hospital that did mine and they basically fob me off with that I was given plenty of information. I have to disagree a picture on the back of the admission form and some stats is not enough information now that I do not have a foggy head like I do when I am pregnant. Enough of my whinge.
Sorry about all the post as I was worried my post would disappear when I went to look at another page.
I also love it how that even if you cycle changes it is due to hormones, weight and the excuse that your cycle changes all the time.
I hope that you are all feeling well.
Take Care
OH excellent news Crazymum2 about the royal womens. They were absolutely fantastic there to me and it didn't cost anything. I had an appointment with my doctor who gave me the referal in the january and I got my first appointment at the royal in the april. I had the blood dones straight away and another blood test done when I ovied. DH had to do a sperm test which was funny cause they stuffed it up and he had to do it again (up here in shepparton). But I got my appointment date in july. It went so quickly. Oh its so exciting.
rttj2000 - I could just give up a big hug woman.
storm - had heaps of movement last night and I swear everyday that she's trying to stick her head out already. How are you feeling mate? Hows Zac going?
I better go cause we're going to be painting in this room soon. I may be without my beloved computer for a while si if im not on line for a week you know what's happened.
take care all
baby dust girls
xxmaz
Hi girl's, I wish I had the gut's to talk to mu DH about the free reversal, but I know if I do he will just yell and scream at me. I don't know how to bring it up. I should be starting my new job on the 17th, so I hope when I've been in it for awhile I might be able to talk to him about it.
hello paula and billy i am new here to. i had my tubes tied after my daughter was born that was 10 years ago. and i recently had them reversed. all i did was went to my doctor and he gave me a refferal to take to the hospital. i was on the wating list for 2 years and had them done .
how long ago did you have your reversal dea? Which state are you in?
Storm how the hell are you mate? Hope m/s is getting better.
I can atleast eat again now, but I still feel like im gonig to be sick. Ive got my ob's tomorrow. My god, Vyolett is going to be here before I know it.
Im starting to **** all over again.
What the hell am I going to do with a front bum??????????????????????
hi maz i had my reversal done on the 27th of june this year and i live in brisbane.
Hi Dea, welcome!! When are you going to start TTCing?
Hi Maz, I'm sorry I haven't been around, DH has pneumonia ( & boy don't I know it:) )
M/s is a distant memory now, yippee, but this bubba likes to lie in the pocket of my scar, ouchies.Had the NT last week , all clear thank god. Getting slight little movements now!
OMG maz you only have less than 8 weeks to go!! How exciting, you're gonna have your little girl in your arms real soon!! Love your ticker pic, it's stunning.
Zac is almost walking now & in only 2 weeks he's gonna be 1, man where has this past year gone?? & last night I noticed he had another tooth, a double WTF, man he is growing up sooo fast. eek my b'day is next week I'll be 34 (:rolleyes: ) & Amy is getting her braces in August. While I've had DH home dying I've still had heaps of other things going on, I will be so glad when he is well again ( he is now, but don't tell him that) I woke up this morning & the side of my face is all swollen ****ing tooth, should have had it out ages ago, but you know what it's like......................
OK must go & do something, like sleep.yeah that sound nice ha ha ha ha
14 weeks & 2 days!!
Oh Dea how exciting. I bet you fall really quickly too. I was done as I said on the 4th of October and fell mid December. Oh dont let the sex thingo take over either. I know a few ladies that did and it almost wreacked their marriages. We just were normal and it worked. Did the doctors tell you to wait a month? We were told to wait for about 6 weeks. I was way to sore to do anything anyway but lay there like a fried egg.
Storm im so glad m/s has almost or gone for you now (ah you b'artch). I still sick still. Sorry to hear Dh is so sick. God yourve had no luck girlfriend. I cant believe how quick time is going. Nikolaus just turned 6 last week and here I am with only 7 weeks to go cause of my c/s. Its been booked so Vyolett will be here on the 5th of September unless she's a real diva and comes early. I went to my ob appointment on monday and there's a chance I may have gestational Diabities. Both my parents are type 2 and me belly is measuring 38 weeks instead of 32. I had the 3 hour test done yesterday so now I have to wait until the 31st of this month to find out how it went. Ive haven't had a ciggi for 5 weeks but I haven't told anyone that I dont smoke anymore. Its easier than coping all the **** form everyone. A bit like telling everyone about getting your tubes reversed.
I better go, enough waffle for me, Vyolett is kicking the crap out of me, in other words she's hungry.
xxmaz
Yay for not smoking Maz, that's great!!
OOOOO 5th Sept, you lucky thing you! In a way I hope this bubba comes on a certain date, but after being induced with Zac, I dont want that again. I really would like to have a home birth, but DH is packing **** at the idea. So *sigh* I have booked into hospital.
:eek: at stll being crook, that's awful, but it is nearly over now.ya poor buggar!
Man 5 weeks with out a fag, you are so good!!!!!
Well I must go & start cooking, I just want to eat everything tonight, but have decided on steak, fried rice vegies & a baked spud with all the usual dressings! The family have gone WTF , but that's what I want for tea:rolleyes: they can either eat it or starve, it's up to them:D
Have a nice night & an even nicer sleep.............
hi maz and storm. the doctor told me six weeks until i can do it. and yeah i can't wait. and neither can my hubby. i also hope that i fall really quickly too.
Ooooo Dea not long to go now! I hope you fall quickly too! Dont wear yourself out trying too hard, it can take some time for things to get back into it. It took Dh & I a full 12 months before I fell, but look what's happening now!! My fertility is like a new toy hehehe, after this bubs is born I think w e need to seriously consider some form of contraception !!!!!
Good luck Darl!!
HI Maz!! How are things going for you? How is miss Vyolett treating you?
thanks for the info storm i'll keep that inmind .
I just picked Wilhelm up from Kinder and they are having a cadbury chocolate fundraising drive. OH Im gonna love it aren't I, not! I can only eat like to pieces of it and then I feel like s**t!
OH Storm Vyolett has been sitting in my back for the last few nights. Iv got artritis in it which doesn't help so you can imagine how painfull it is at the moment. Im not aloud to take my medication and the stupid ob said oh you can take panadole. I laughed at him. ****ER! as if that's gonna help.
Oh I just read what you had for tea the other night. Im gonna make baked potatoes now to. Yummy. S**T ive gotta get some sour cream but.
IM gonna be stuffed this weekend cause were taking down an old wall in our new room to be. it will make our bed room over 7 metres long. Oh I cant wait to be able to put my bed in there. Im sleeping against the wall at the moment and if I need to get out of bed I have to crawl over Jed. He thinks its me trying the funny business on him sometimes. Id be lucky to find that part of my body at the moment, let alone see it. I cant even see my toes when I stand up.
I cant believe its been 5 weeks since Ive had a fag. I think I was still smoking cause I couldn't eat and it sort of stopped me from being hungry. I wasn't changing my life style with this pg. I smoked,drank partied up and ate all the wrong things when I was pg with Nikolaus. He turned out perfectly healthy but I did everything by the book with Wilhelm, didn't smoke, drink etc and he ended up autistic. So were's the evidence of it being bad? Both boys were Just under 8 pound and bloody long. Wilhelm was 59cm when he was born and Im thinking this baby isn't gonig to be much better.
Ah listen to me waffle
Im going for a coffee and a wee, maybe not in that order but anyway
xxmaz