Huge babe. First of all CONGRATULATIONS on your pregnancy! Awesome chrissy present for you this year!
I'm so sorry this is happening to you and your family hun. I haven't had a late loss, but i have had 3 mc and i have a close friend who has lost twins (she is on BB) at 24 weeks.
I have sorta been on both sides of the fence with this....When i lost my daughter(at 12 weeks last year) my mum was pregnant too- we were due 10 days apart. I won't lie, it was really hard and i couldn't speak to her for a couple of weeks afterwards....BUT i tried not to make her feel bad because i knew she felt horrible too. I ended up being at the birth of my little sister and i am so glad i was
With my friend i felt horrible telling her, as she struggled with infertility as well as the loss of her babies. I told her i wouldn't shove it in her face, and if she couldn't be around me to just tell me and i wouldn't be offended at all. Although it hurt like hell for her, she got up and hugged me and said congratulations and has been nothing but supportive throughout my whole pregnancy, because she loves me and is my friend.
Now she's pregnant too I'm making her get pg belly photo's done with me lol.
I am sorry for your sisters loss, but it is unfair for you to feel persecuted by your family. You obviously understand that she wouldn't want to know about your pg right now, which is fair enough, but to cut you conpletely out of her life is really harsh. I hope your family wakes up to themselves, and thinks about what they are doing.
From a rational point of view you didn't wake up the morning after your sisters loss and say i think i'll have another baby, because that'll rub it in thier face?
I hope you guys can talk and work things out. Huge hugs, and im sorry if i rambled!
You have every right to celebrate your pregnancy and your family should be happy for you I can understand your sister on the other hand, not feeling happy about it all. She would be hurting so badly. Give her time... she will come around.
It's an awful situation for you and not fair on you either
Congratulations on your pregnancy - I'm stoked for you
Sorry for your sister's and your families loss xox
Maybe she was initially hurt that you weren't the one to tell her and her grief is just adding to her reaction?
Could she feel rejected and/or abandoned by you because you didn't tell her the news yourself? She may already feel alone and distanced by having gone through this experience and not having anyone close who has gone through the same thing?
Were you sparing your own feelings as well by getting your Mother to tell her, so as to not have to deal with her reaction and emotions? I can totally understand how hard it would be to give her that news and I would quite possibly have done the same thing, so there's no judgement from me. Just a suggestion as to how your sister may see it.
I know the loss of a baby/child is hard on entire families, so big hugs to you and I hope it works out for you and your sister xox
What a hard position for you to be in. Hugs and congratulations on your pg.
Firstly, as the others have said, your sister is dealing with a very deep, very painful grief. A grief so intense that she is not physically able to connect with you or your pg, because you have the one thing she would give anything to have, and that cuts her like a knife inside. I dont think it is wrong or unfair that she resents you at this time because at the moment she can only see the fact that you are pg and she is not, when she should be. But one day perhaps she may regret the way she is treating you now.
Of course it isnt fair that your pg is being ignored when it shouldnt be. I would be devastated too, and I guess there is no win-win here. However your mum should be doing more to celebrate your pg, because this new baby deserves it. You should not feel bad in any way that you conceived this baby when you did. You have a right to live the life you want, and you did consider her feelings by asking your mum to tell your sister.
babe. First of all CONGRATULATIONS on your pregnancy! Awesome chrissy present for you this year!
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