Hope your feeling better this morning. Like the others have said you lost your baby and you have every right to be sad. I think that you have been trying to stay strong about it and it finally got to much for you and you needed to give in to it. I am glad there were some lovely ladies here to give you some love last night.
I feel pregnant with DD1 after 3 cycles and got a BFP at 11DPO. With DD2 I got BFN at 14DPO and finally got a BFP at 19DPO. So you may not always get your BFP at the same time every pregnancy.