Printable View
Chepie; we are heading to London then off on a Contiki tour. Netherlands, Germany, Austria, Italy, Switzerland, France. Then back to London for 3 days. I cant wait, its been a long time coming and Dh has never been anywhere overseas outside a war zone so its going to be a new experience for him! Desperately needed after the last 8mths.
Im still trying to get my head around no kids for 16 days :o
Hullo. New to this area...
For those that haven't read my other posts, I had a miscarriage at 11wks, just over two weeks ago. I have two gorgeous kids, result of two uneventful pregnancies, so when I started bleeding I completely freaked out.
This loss has really thrown me. I've been struggling but I think I am getting there... Where, I don't know. But I think I am getting somewhere.
I've found talking to other women who have been through this has been really helpful... Sucks so much that there are so many that have been down this road but I am grateful for their willingness to share with me, hold my hand and cry with me. Pac, I'm looking at you here :)
I'm feeling a bit adrift. Where do I go from here?
HI OC
I am really sorry you have to go through this. Its really unpleasant to say the least and totally unfair. My thoughts are with you.
I know I cant make it better for, but I hope you muddle through it and feel a bit better soon. I can only relay my experience in an effort to help you along. I had a miscarriage a few months ago as well. After a week or 2 I thought I was on top of it and moving forward to the future with positivity. How wrong I was. I understood all the statistics, the process, the advice from many websites, but what I hadnt prepared myself for, nor was i expecting, was the lashing out at my friends and loved ones, and the rage I felt.
I thought I was in the clear, relatively undamaged and with the determination to move forward and accomplish what I was entitled to.
It was hard and I was not a very nice person during this time. I didnt even like myself because of the way I treated those around me. It took me a little while to realise why I was being like that and where it was coming from. I was able to kurb my reactions a little better once I understood.
All I can say is that you cant fight the roller coaster. You just have to go with it and keep your eyes open. If you snap at someone or are being a little bit insensitive, don't be too hard on yourself. What you have to process is tough. really tough.
Sorry for babbling on but I just hate seeing people in pain and not being able to help.
big hugs
CT
Thanks CT for your response. I really appreciate it. :hug:
To make matters worse today, I think I'm ovulating :(
I don't quite know how to process that. I don't want to ovulate. For the first time in the "starting a family" part of my life, I don't want to be ovulating.
I want to be pregnant :crying:
Hi everyone, sorry been reading but not posting.
OP - :hug: :hug: :hug: I just read your other post but I'll reply here - it's so hard with the forward thinking, knowing the plans you were supposed to have, the dreams you were going to fulfill. As time goes on and you learn to come to terms with your loss, things pop up. Like for me, on the 11/11 - that was my very first EDD. We were supposed to have a three year old. Christmas day is my next one. My EDD was 25/12. At this point, I'm supposed to be so uncomfortable, swollen ankles, much much heavier. But I'm not. Some days that's okay. But others, well it's not so great. I get through the 11/11 one by looking at DD. If I hadn't mc that very first time, then she wouldn't be here. And that's horrible to think and say, but it's what gets me by. Where do you go to from here? One day at a time, one foot in front of the other. :hug:
Hi ya girls....
Freya - that sounds like an AWESOME trip!! Hope you have best time!! No kids for 16 whole days- enjoy ;0)
Ocean Princess- hun I am so very sorry for your loss.... I feel your heartache .... I wish I could say something to make it better xoxo I am stilling struggling with the loss of Hugh, especially on Wednesday because that was when we said goodbye and he EDD is 29 Feb - a Wed...... but I am getting there like PacRaKMG says 'one foot in front of the other
Time for a new thread. Please find it HERE