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Thread: Miscarriage/Loss General Discussion #1

  1. #1
    kirsty Guest

    Default Miscarriage/Loss General Discussion #1

    Have you suffered a miscarriage or pregnancy loss and are looking for others to talk to who are in a similar situation? Are you looking for understanding and support? If so, this is the place for you.



    This thread is designed to help you through the tough times....whether you have recently suffered a miscarriage or pregnancy loss, or if it was some time ago. Feel free to share your thoughts and feelings on how you remember your angels on special occasions and anniversaries.

    Whether your loss was recent or not, it can really help to share your thoughts and to know that you are not alone in this journey.

    Please note that there is a separate forum for Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss and Pregnancy after Miscarriage and Loss, and we have monthly threads available to all members which we encourage you to join.

    Note: We are going to trial this discussion thread for a short while, as we believe that its important to not form too many groups within the forums, and that we should aim to help one another no matter what group we are in.

  2. #2
    kirsty Guest

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    Hello ladies, last thread can be found here if you need to catch up with where everyone is at.

  3. #3

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    Hello, again. Just a quick post before I go to bed. *TMI alert* I've just started to notice today that while not much is coming out of me anymore, there is a distinct unpleasant odour to the clots that do appear when I wipe. Could this be an early sign of infection? I'm not getting any cramping. I'm not running a temperature. However the dizziness is back although not as bad as last Wednesday. I'm a bit worried. It's now a week since my pg failed. I'd be grateful for any advice. Thank you.

  4. #4
    Owl Guest

    Default Strange smell

    Hi Kbowman I'm not sure if i'm doing this right as it's my first time ever on one of these forums but here goes! I just had my third consecutive miscarriage on black friday 13th (bot only my first d&c) and I too thought that i had deveolped an infection so i went back to the hospital after 2 days and was given antibiotics just in case. i then went to my gp 2 days later and she called the hospital for results and was told that my swabs showed up normal and told me to stop the antibiotics, so i did. Yesterday and the day before i had the same smell and colour and thought oh here we go again, i shouldn't have stopped taking the antibiotcs so i called the hospital again to check if more results had come back and they said no, but explained that as i'd had an operation (d&c) this was how my body would recover and all perfectly normal. It sees better today so I hope that this is the end of it.

  5. #5

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    Hi Kerry, How are you doing - are you feeling any better? i am hoping its not a sign of infection but these were signs that i was told to look out for by my OB. Hoping all is ok.

    Owl, I am really sorry to hear of your three losses and my heart goes out to you. I am glad that you have found BB because there is lots of support to be found here both now and when you try to conceive again. How are you doing?

    Love Sarah xx

  6. #6
    Owl Guest

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    Hi Sarah,
    i wasn't quite sure how this all works and was pleased to see your message. I' doing ok most of the time but it's great to see all the input from various situations. Unfortunately i dont have time on my side, i' almost 42 and i'm not sure if the last 2 m/c were due to my body not having sufficient time to recover as there was only 2 months in between but we'll see what happens.
    Thanks

  7. #7

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    I've just spoken to the obstetrician I'd arranged to care for me through my pregnancy and she's putting me on antibiotics as of tomorrow, and referring me for a blood test (also tomorrow) and I'm to organise for the results of the ultrasound (Wednesday afternoon) to be sent through to her. She thinks that the slow drop in the hCG level and the current odour of the clots suggest there could be some retained product. On the upside, I feel relieved to have spoken to her. So blood test and antibiotics tomorrow! yay. Thanks Sarah and Owl.

  8. #8

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    Hi guys,

    Owl, I can understand your urgency to have a baby, To best honest i am not sure how much time between pregnancies can affect the outcome because i fell pregnant with my second Daugther about 10 weeks after Katelyn was born (i only had one real AF) and Lucy arrived safe and healthy and i know that doctors have differing opinions on how long you should wait. Has your doctor advised you to have any testing (eg Blood tests) given that you have sadly lost 3 babies now? As for being new to BB, you will pick it up pretty easy and all the women are lovely and very helpful in this section. When you feel ready to try again please have a look at the trying to conceive after M & L forum as i personally found this very helpful both times i conceived after Katelyn was born.

    Kerry, Im so glad that you have spoken to your OB. Im really sorry that there might be some retained product (what a horrible term that they use) but you will be able to start healing once you actually know what is going on and what action you actually need to take rather than waiting in limbo land. I hope you get the answers you need soon.

    Love Sarah xx

  9. #9

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    Hi guys,

    Hope you don't mind me joining in.

    I lost my baby on 14 October - well, found out it was non-viable, and am still losing it today, but I think it is almost finished. I also hate that word 'product'. At my follow-up appointment on Tues, I was told I still have some retained product, but I think it is almost all gone.

    I have heard conflicting stories about when it is ok to start trying again too. I had heard you could try whenever, but that a break for 2 or 3 months is a good idea. But the doctor at the hospital on Tues said that the risk of miscarriage is higher if you try again within 3 months. I don't know who is right?

    Kerry - I hope things are going ok now.

    Owl - I hope you get some answers.

    Hi Sarah, and anyone else.

    Love Bun
    Last edited by Bun; October 26th, 2006 at 07:01 PM.

  10. #10
    Owl Guest

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    Hi Sarah and Bun,
    I just saw the doc yesterday and had so much blood taken from me for lots of tests, the results of which i have to wait 6 weeks for. My partner on the other hand is not so keen, even though he only needs 1 test, I think it might have something to do with the male opinion "there's nothing wrong with me". Anyway the doc said she usually tells people to wait at least 3 to 6 months, which isn't too bad. My gp also said that as it was a twin pregnancy better to wait at least 2 months. Thanks for the advice on ttc after m&L forum, i'll go there now.
    Cheers
    Elena

  11. #11

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    Hello Sarah, Bun and Elena! I finally heard back from my ob yesterday (after a few anxious phone calls) and she says the scans have come back clear, I've had a complete miscarriage. And my blood test showed my hCG has fallen to 690, which she considered to be a significant drop and that I should be back to normal within the next few days. It's such a relief. I'd presumed that no news on Thursday (I had the scan on Wednesday afternoon and bt on Tuesday afternoon) was good news until I rang on Friday and they said they hadn't received the scans and I had to chase up Hunter Imaging to fax them on (even though when I had the scan done, I'd asked for that to happen and the sonographer marked it on the referral sheet!).
    Good luck with all those blood tests, Elena. My hands get clammy just thinking about blood tests now! Bun, my doctor suggested that I wait for one to two cycles before trying again and to make sure that we used some form of contraception in the meantime, and no sex until after the bleeding had stopped (no tampons either, because of risk of infection). I'm still getting occasional spots of brown slime/goo when I wipe, but things look like they're almost back to normal.
    I'm feeling a bit achy/crampy this morning and I'm wondering whether this is because I might be ovulating again soon. Would that be possible? Time for breakfast and another antibiotic capsule!! BBL!

  12. #12
    cammy1980 Guest

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    Hi,
    I'm new here and thought that it's touching and very courageous for all of you to talk about this. I, myself, have had a miscarriage. About the end of June 2005 I had a feeling I was pregnant. You know how you can just sense that??? Well I went for an appointment on July 3 and the doctor confimed that I was pregnent, I was 2 months at that time. I have to admit I was a bit shocked to find out that I had become pregnant. I was scared, I was 25, I had just started a job and couldn't afford a child but I was going to go through with this pregnancy. I was taught that things happen for a reason.
    I didn't know how to tell my boyfriend, however, I decided that after we came back from our trip with his family I would tell him. While we were on the trip I was playing with his nephew and I started feeling cramps. I dismissed it as my imagination, or I was trying to ignore them.

    I never got to tell him that I was pregnant. While I was in the shower one day I felt something was wrong. I looked down and there was blood. I guess I figured that there was no point in telling him what had happened. And I live with that guilt everyday.

    Thank you for listening, and sorry for intruding.

  13. #13

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    Hi Cammy1980

    Please do not apologise for intruding. I am very sorry to hear of your loss and also to hear that you have been coping with this by yourself. You should not feel guitly for how you chose to deal with your loss, you dealt with it the best way that you could at the time. I am not sure from reading your thread if you are still with the father. But if you feel that you want to or need to tell him, please don't think that because time has passed you should hold onto this by yourself. Just do what your heart tells you.

    Either way, please know that if you need to share, we are here to listen.

    <<Hugs>>

    Kristy

  14. #14

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    Hi guys,

    How is everyone going?

    Cammy 1980 - welcome and I am so sorry for your loss. It must be so hard going through this alone. Please don't hesitate to talk to us if you need any support.

    Kerry - I am glad to hear that your scans have come back clear.

    Owl - good luck with your test results.

    Well, I have stopped bleeding now so have physically recovered. Emotionally, I am still all over the place - fine one minute and not coping the next. I have been getting very depressed and have a history of depression and it scares me. My DH seems to be over it now, and pretty much told me the other night to just 'get over it', which really didn't help. I don't know how long it takes to recover after something like this, but it certainly isn't quick.

    We are going on a holiday soon to try and give ourselves some space and hopefully some new happy memories.

    I hope you are all going ok.

    Love Bun

  15. #15

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    Hello Bun, Sarah, Owl, Kristy and Cammy1980. I hope you're all doing ok! Welcome Cammy, sorry to hear that you had to go through this experience on your own. Don't feel that you're intruding. I've found the most wonderful support on BB, in the days after my first BFP and particularly so after my m/c on October 15.
    One of the doctors from my local GP's practice rang me on Sauturday to talk over the scans and blood test results that had also been sent to the practice. He said he thought the hCG levels would take at least a week to go back to normal. And he's also advised that I make an appointment to get a referral to a specialist to talk over what's happened and what can be done next time I fall pg, as "being 38", these things can be "a bit tricky".
    I had some strong cramping this morning and ended up passing a largish clot when I wiped, so my body must still be cleansing itself. I'm looking forward to AF arriving and then saying hello to a new cycle. And it looks like DP and I'll shortly be buying our first house together.
    x x x x

  16. #16
    Owl Guest

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    Hi Bun,
    thanks for your thoughts, I'm the feeling the same as you, fine 1 minute and not the next and as far as my partner goes, well men just react differently. My partner is really not supportive to start with, but even so most of them just look at something like this differently to us, particularly as it's so early. My doctor has asked me if i want to see the psychologist at the hospital, so i took her up on the offer as it cant hurt really. We'll see what happens

  17. #17

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    Hello Owl, how did you go with your bt results? hope everything's ok. Interesting the differing recommendations about when to start TTC again. My doctor said to wait a couple of cycles and until I'm emotionally ready.

    Well, AF arrived suddenly yesterday afternoon and is quite heavy (compared to what I normally have). So YAY! and I've caught a cold off the kids in my class! so i'm feeling fabulous! lol.

  18. #18
    Owl Guest

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    Hi Kerry

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