Hi Bella, I'm so sorry to hear that your first pregnancy was a blighted ovum. I too had the same thing happen to me (Obstetrician said it was either a blighted ovum, or a missed miscarriage where the baby had passed away some time ago because there was no sign of the baby on ultrasound). It was also my first pregnancy and I was absolutely devastated.

When I fell pregnant 4 months later I was so happy, but at the same time I was terrified. Even though the Obstetrician told me that it was unlikely to happen again, I was still so worried that something would be wrong. The closer I got to my first scan the more excitement I felt, but also the more terrified I got. I was literally shaking the day we went in to see the baby for the first time (6w1d). But there on the screen was my beautiful little boy with a lovely strong heartbeat. It was the most magical thing I had ever seen. I cried when my Obstetrician put the sound on and I could hear that precious heart beating steadily. That precious little boy is now 14 months old! I'm now pregnant again (10w5d) and I felt those same panicky feelings before our first ultrasound this time as well. Once again my fears have been unfounded because this little one is also growing wonderfully and we have been able to see her on ultrasound with a beautiful heart beating, as well as listening to her heart beating on our fetal doppler at home.

I've heard a number of people say that their pregnancies have felt different between a viable pregnancy and a blighted ovum, but to be honest, for me they were almost exactly the same. I've had morning sickness with all 3 pregnancies, as well a a number of other pregnancy symptoms. I think that's one of the things that have made it hard for me, because when people say that morning sickness is a good sign of a healthy pregnancy, I can't help but think back to my angel's pregnancy when the morning sickness wasn't a sign that all was well. Something that I find very upsetting after losing a baby is that you never have that "blissfully ignorant" pregnancy afterwards. You always worry, and you always wonder if something is going wrong, and will you see a heart beating at your next scan. When we went to our first scan with the first pregnancy it never even entered my mind that something might be wrong, so it was such a shock when we found out that we were never going to hold this baby in our arms. But while it may make some things harder, perhaps it gives us just that small bit of extra appreciation as to how lucky we are when we hold our beautiful little babies in our arms.

I wish you all the best Bella, and I hope that your scan in 2 weeks shows you a gorgeous little baby with a strong heartbeat. And just remember, the worry you feel is all because of how much you already love your little baby, so take comfort in that love