Last night we went down to the Beach and let some balloons go for our Baby girl. We did it mainly for our other children, but id dint realise how it would make me feel..

we have now said goodbye, we are not waiting for anything anymore ( we have her ashes, we have named her we have told people and now we have said goodbye) It is all so real now, there is nothing that can help us pretend that this is a dream or a really bad joke anymore this is real, Our baby girl has gone.

Now i am scared that people will forget Kyarna, that i will forget her. it scares me that one day, i might go a whole day without crying, and that i may even go a whole day without thinking of my girl. I dont want people to tell me that it is going to get easier, that i will feel better.. at least when it hurts this much i know i cant forget her.

Im sorry to post this, but i just had to ge tit all out