Hey gypsy, I have just TT'd my DD2 and although she was easy, I do recall my DS (7) took a few weeks to get the hang of poo! Honestly, nothing worse than poo in undies, especially if it's not a nice solid log! I bought him some 99c undies at Best and Less and if it was terribly messy or we were out I threw them in the bin.
I would not ask your DD every minute or so whether she wants to go, it will lose it's impact and I suspect she will automatically answer 'no' rather then actually considering whether she needs to go. In fact, at this stage I wouldn't ask at all, I would just tell her it's time to try. At the normal time she poos (I think you said she regularly goes in the morning) I would put her on the loo and read her a book or chat to her for as long as she's happy to sit. Often a poo needs to be pushed out instead of just happening so I tended to sit on her little step stool in front of her, hold my DD's hands and say 'here, mummy will help you push out the poos...' then I squeezed her hands, screwed up my face and made pushing noises!! Very attractive, I know... but DD would do the same thing I did and would actually push and often the poo would come. If you know your DD needs a poo, I would be taking her every 10 minutes or so and maybe every half an hour to an hour for 'a try!' the rest of the time.
You are obviously frustrated but I think it is really important not to show that to your DD. Try making it an exciting challenge instead - 'hey, today we're going to catch that poo and put him in the toilet! What should we do when we've put the poo in the toilet? Should we bake a cake to celebrate? Come on, let's go and try!' If it doesn't happen, try again 10 minutes or so later if it's her normal poo time. 'Let's catch that poo and put him in the toilet so that we can bake our celebration cake!' If I didn't have time to bake, I would ring DH or grandma and let DD tell them that she had put her poo in the loo. I guess it's a reward, but it's instant and the reward is time and attention rather than a sticker or a lolly.
Finally, my advice is to let DD watch you on the toilet. She needs to know that it is normal to poo in the loo. 'Look! Mummy put her poo in the toilet, let's flush him away and you can help mum wash her hands!' Get her to hold your hands and 'help' you push out the poo. She has to know what's going on under there, so many times DD has examined what I left in the bowl. This parenting thing is kinda gross sometimes!! I'm not a fan of a potty because I think a child sees you putting your poo in the toilet, but then you tell them to put their poo somewhere else. Confusing, I reckon. I use a cushie tushie seat and a step stool for DD and it works well, I've used the same system for my other two kids. However, if you have started on a potty and she has the hang of it, perhaps you're better off not changing. Or, ask her if she'd like to put her poo in the Big Girl Toilet like mum? Have a cushie tushie (buy them at Big W and probably everywhere else!) and a stool as well as the potty and see what she prefers? Avoid those plastic kiddie seats, they look uncomfortable and I remember DD1 being nastily pinched by one at a friends house!!
Good luck, your DD will get there. Perseverance and lots of patience!
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