Where to from here? Please help

[Mak]

Could you try a different tack - maybe get a set of the days of the week undies and try to get her to pick/wear the right ones?
I do tend to agree with the try not to worry approach tho - she will do it eventually. One of the few things the kids can control???
xxx

[Arimeh]

Back while I get the chance to respond.

Heather - she's not afraid of the toilet splashing, she's done a few in the toilet, just no motivation to keep going once its done. That cutting away the nappy is how my brother trained his son though, but I can't even get her into the toilet in the first place. She has discussed poos with her cousin who is 4 months older and toilet trained, but the conversation didn't motivate her to change from nappies to undies.

San - I've tried the different things as well, I had a chart that had different shapes on it, and for each one she did, each shape meant 3 or 4 things she could pick from. That was the most successful, she did 2 poos in a row that time LOL.. I don't think she would be motivated to clean herself, she would just flat out refuse to do it.

Arcadia - yeah thats her normal pooing pattern. Sometimes she gets a bit clogged up and we give her movicol, but mostly its 3 a day, sometimes they are hard, sometimes they are loose-ish, but nothing out of the ordinary. I haven't got that book though, so I'll look for it. For the most part, we are calm now, and we just change her, and we don't make a fuss. Which is fine since she's in nappies.

Mak - we sort of tried that when she was in daycare, she knew she had to wear undies that day and she was fine with that - she would poo on the way home in her undies - frustrating! lol

Thanks everyone, she said the other day that she would poo in the toilet when she turned 4, well today's the day, and I've cleaned one poo already (in a nappy) and she came to me straight after doing it and said "mum I've done a poo, I missed doing it in the toilet". I told her it didn't matter, there's always next time to get it in there.

So who knows - maybe she will train before she's 5 LOL

[Abigail]

My DS refused to poo. His was caused through trauma from chronic constipation issues.

Are you certain that she is not still undergoing the constipation cycle? Just going from your post, she should from my understanding (no matter how many poos she is doing) be doing a 3-4 on the bristol stool chart, so that is sausages without any hard lumps, no struggling to pass, no pain. The fact that you are using movicol occasionally suggests to me (and Im no doctor and my definitely be bias towards constipation lol!) that she is not past the constipation cycle. If you have prolonged unresolved constipation then it becomes hard for them to recognise the need to go all the time until the body is pushing it out against her knowledge.

Something you can try is the books to normalise pooing. We have three different ones, wheres the poo, everybody poos and another one I cant think of from the top of my head. My other suggestion is to modify your toilet routine. DO NOT mention poo, just put her on the toilet after every meal, for 5 minutes at least. Give her a rewards for sitting and then another if she poos. We used this method with DS and within days he moved past toileting refusal! Might be worth another shot. Consistency is the key also. Good luck.

[Arimeh]

Ìts rare that we use movicol. I'm sorry if my post sounded like we use it all the time, its rare that we need to use it.