mums of premmies, i need help!

[skybie]

hi ladies, im currently 35 weeks and my waters broke this morning, labour failed to establish and theyre going to induce me next week provided i dont go before hand.
just wanted to ask wat to expect from the special care nursery?
how long were ur bubba's in there for?
how did u cope going home without them?
how did u cope once they were home?
i've been told bubs will go straight to the SCN so im worried about not bonding with her.
all advice and tips very much appreciated!!

[Liz]

Oh wow... some of these bubs are just in too much of a hurry aren't they

Kayla was born at 34 weeks, and was in NICU at the public hospital for about a week, and then we moved over to private where I boarded in and stayed with her for another 2 weeks. So I didn't go home without her. I did pop home a couple of times to sort out my boys haha.. and to make sure we were ready to bring her home.. being prem things weren't exactly ready!

Umm.. what to expect in SCN.. it really depends on the care bub needs. Kayla was having apnea episodes so had to be monitored, and was being treated with caffeine. This is the reason we were in so long coz the dr's were taking forever to let her off the caffeine and then they like them to stay for a bit after stopping treatment. Otherwise it was making sure she could feed well. Kayla was actually very good at the breast from the word go, but lost a lot weight with the effort, so they put her on alternate tube feeds & suck feeds so she could rest and just concentrate on growing, which is what she'd be doing if she wasn't born yet!

I think jaundice is quite common for prems too, so it's possible bub might spend time under the lights.

The thing I didn't like about the whole thing was the scheduled and measured feeds. I refused to let them give any formula and I sat at that pump and got my milk in (also had a bit of help from my toddler to get the milk in ) but I had a great nurse in the SCN who was pushing for demand feeds with the paed. It was her that helped get her off the caffeine too, she was quite bossy with the paed LOL.

Coping once we were home.. nothing unusual really.. I didn't have any concerns about her apnea any more and refused to get caught up in the whole baby monitor sensor pad thing.. she was sleeping with me anyway. It was a long time until she smiled tho.. so I had a newborn for such a long time! Took a while for her to wake up and interact. She smiled at corrected 6 weeks, so she was actually 12 weeks old. But otherwise, there was nothing different to bringing home a term baby.

Hope some of that helps.. and I hope your bub stays put for a bit longer. If not, I'm sure things will be fine.. some bubs born at 35 weeks are only in SCN for about a week (or even less). So I hope all goes well for you both Enjoy meeting your bub!

[bubno.3]

hi

Your baby may be absolutely fine at 36 wks and you may find you wont need the SCN. I wouldnt worry to much or try not too...

My advise just go with the flow and just wait and see how bubs is when she arrives.

Cheers

[skybie]

thanks girls, really appreciate it,
its so overwhelmng when its completely unexpected(well i guess its overwhelming even when its not)
ive never been so scared in my life. i know she's going to be fine, but i cant help but worry, especially when i have alittle girl at home who needs her mumma (not to mention a man at home who is going to struggle doing things for himself this week!) and all im doing is laying around in a bed!

[Liz]

My DS coped ok while I was with Kayla. DH gained some appreciation for what my days were like looking after DS, doing washing, keeping on top of the kitchen etc hahaha. We made use of video calling and of course they visited most of the day anyway, so DS & DH coped quite well without me. There was a few rough nights where he wanted me I think, but they got through it.

Try not to worry too much, it's a pretty safe gestation to be having bubs from what I understand (completely uneducated opinion of course haha). It's more a waiting game than anything.. for them to mature a bit to be able to feed well and for things to stabilise. Kayla's apnea was just an immaturity thing and she just needed monitoring, and they keep an eye on blood sugar levels and jaundice. There would obviously be more to it than that but that was my observation from hanging around an SCN for 3 weeks!

The longer your bub stays put the better tho, so I hope bub is still nice & comfy in there! My DS was born at 37 weeks and was considered term, and was fine, just a bit of jaundice.

[butterfly_warrior]

Sam was born at 36 weeks...

The main issue you are going to find is that it's around that point that they develop the suck reflex. You may spend some time having tube feeds waiting for bub to get strong enough to be on all suck feeds - you won't be allowed to go home until bub is able to cope with 100% suck feeds and is gaining weight. For both myself and a friend who had a baby born at 36 weeks, the stay was around 10 days. However, both of us came home bottle feeding. My friend was only expressing until her son got big enough to be able to attach properly (around 6 weeks) while I had no milk and had to formula feed. I'm told they tend to come home earlier if you bottle feed, but if I was to do it again (and had milk) I would stay that bit longer to get breast feeding going well if necessary.

The only other real issue we had was low blood sugars - Sam had to have a lot of heal ***** tests checking that they were going ok. With low blood sugar they can't maintain body temperature and don't have the energy to suck. We had no breathing issues, apart from one incident with a NG tube that was too short. It allowed milk to dribble back up and it came out Sam's nose. With one nostril blocked by the NG tube, the other nostril blocked by regurgitated milk, he just simply decided to stop breathing. We spent a few days on monitors but once the tube was changed he was fine.

From talking to friends, the SCN experience can vary greatly depending on whether you are going public or private. I was in a private hospital, had excellent food and remained a patient for the entire 10 days that Sam was in. Another premie mum (35 weeks) was in a public hospital and was boarding (couldn't drive after a c-section) and pretty much had to provide her own food. Both of us had formula pushed, both of us had trouble with each lactation consultant telling us different things.

Sam's upset, so I have to go, happy to answer any questions you may have.

BW

[Liz]

Yeah, there is a push for formula feeds/comps. They are supposed to get your signed consent so remind them of that! I refused to sign but there was still pressure from them. Always ask for alternatives, express express express and save any colostrum you can get.. this will help stabilise sugar levels and is better for bub's tum. Insist on any suck feeds being from the breast too... not from a bottle. I didn't allow any bottle feeds either (I was a tough customer )

Perhaps while you're on bedrest, jump on the phone and get to know a local ABA counsellor that can assist you with feeding/expressing issues. There is a lot of conflicting feeding advice in hospital, a lot of which needs to be ignored!! (well.. I ignored a lot of it anyway hehe)

Will be thinking of you!

[Santosha]

Have PM'd you hun.

[butterfly_warrior]

Sleeping baby now...

The thing to remember is that the SCN staff are going to be focussed on the baby. Not you, not the family unit as a whole, not ensuring that you and your baby bond appropriately.

It sucks, and I don't know that there's a way to change the system. But it does help to go in knowing that's the way it's going to be. I didn't know at all and had only about 7 hours between waters breaking and Sam arriving so I had no time to prepare myself physically or mentally for what we were about to face.

If your baby's in an open crib and you want to hold them - DO SO! Don't let the nurses tell you that you can't. If they start on about monitors and stuff, insist they help you around them. We were allowed to have Sam in my room for breif periods when he wasn't on monitors, and I really wish I'd done it more often, rather than only when we had visitors (they did insist that he wasn't picked up and handed around to visitors though, which is understandable).

We did have some initial bonding issues, but I feel that came mainly out of him being an IVF baby, rather than being a prem baby and the initial separation. The inability to breastfeed certainly had an impact there as well. We have certainly overcome them now and all is well. Sam is happy, healthy, thriving... he's gone from being barely on the 3rd percentile for weight at birth (I was just impressed he was on the charts at all!) to now being on the 75th at nearly 9 months old.

BW

[skybie]

wow thanks girls!
ur all so amazing. will get a hold of an LC and talk to her about starting to express soon so that i have a decent supply by the time she comes.
its so confusing in here, different docs telling me different things, well one thing remains the same, the longer she stays in the happier they are.
had a rough night last night cried myself to sleep, i think it was just the whole situation and being very overtired!
hoping for a better night tonight
CTG's are gorgeous, bubs very happy inside and likes to get excited. she's not engaged and my cervix is still long so they really dont think she's going to come on her own.
ill keep u posted and thank u so much for answering all my questions! im going to have to remember to be strong and not get pushed around
xxx
Skye

[Liz]

How strict is your bedrest? Would it be possible to get a wheelchair and go and meet the nurses in the SCN and get a feel for where bub will initially be taken? (I'm assuming you're at the hospital from your post)

[aussienic]

My DD was born at 36 weeks. Apart from very low blood sugars she was fine. I had GD so that was the reason for Low BSL.

She fed like a trooper as well from day one.. there were no troubles with her breathing of anything.

Good luck

[skybie]

How strict is your bedrest? Would it be possible to get a wheelchair and go and meet the nurses in the SCN and get a feel for where bub will initially be taken? (I'm assuming you're at the hospital from your post)

yep in hossy atm, not on strict bedrest but they dont look too happy when they see me walking around!! i cant help that im bored! the SCN is literally across the halll from my room and i requested a tour this morning when the midwife came in, so just waiting on that

[Liz]

Any news? Thinking of you.. hope everything is going ok

[Santosha]

Hope things are going ok hun. Hang in there bubba... keep cookin' for a few more days.

[skybie]

hi girls, thank u so much for keeping me in your thoughts!
well thankfully im still pregnant for the moment.
they sent me home today, bubs is very content in there and i have no signs of infection and my tightenings have completely eased off!
but that being said they did say it could literally happen any day.
if it doesnt happen and i dnt develop an infection im booked in for an induction on the 18th (happy birthday to me!) when i'll be 37 weeks. Which means bubby wont HAVE to spend time in the SCN unless she actually has to!
as much as i want her out so i know for sure she's safe i'd rather her not spend time in the SCN.
Im going back to the hospital tomorrow for a growth scan to make sure everythings still getting big and then again on friday for bloods and monitoring, then again on monday and weds for the same.
Will keep u posted, hopefully i start writting about how bored i am from being on bedrest
Lots of love
Skye

[*Beema*]

That is great news that you are home, stay on the bed rest and get to 37 weeks at least, it is fabulous news that your cervix is long and close and the tighenings have calmed down

DD was born at 33 weeks, I am eternally greatful that we were lucky and had a relatively smooth SCBU journey. Extremely low BLS, short term O2, jaundice (under lights for a couple of days) and feeding problems. We transferred to a private hospital when she was 5 days old and to home 6 days later. She too took a lot longer to smile and meet some milestones, and it can be exhausting going through the newborn phase a lot longer than my friends were.

It took a huge amount of effort for me to BF, DD was too small, and I didn't have very good milky supply, and suck feeds took way too much of her energy, and DD did receive some F (even though it was not what I wanted and I don't ever remember signing a form saying she could have any), I also did not want to starve her, she lost weight and it took her a lot of effort to regain any, it wasn't easy for us by any stretch of the imagination, but every single effort to BF was worth it.

I don't ever make the assumption that just because a bub makes it to 35 or 36 weeks that it will all be fine and have a really smooth journey (and by no means do I want to scare you).

I have just seen and a friends with mums and babies all over the spectrum, bigger prems and smaller prems all of varying gestations from 23 weeks through to 36 weeks 5 days. And every single story is different, some early ones have a pretty smooth ride like we did, others later did not. I would be doing everything possible to keep bubs in until term, as it is by that time that all of their organs should be fully developed to be able to cope with living earthside rather than bellyside.

I hope that this doesn't scare you in anyway, as it is certainly not what I want to do, just to make it clear that 37 weeks being classed as FT is done so for a very good reason.

Good to see you are having a growth scan so they can get an idea how bubs is going.

Take care and I hope the next week and a bit goes nice a quickly for you.
Take care and rest up
xxoo

[nickers]

just noticed your ticker congratulations on the arrival of Isabelle!! how is she doing?