I am just stalking this thread for ideas too as I have an almost 7 yr old DD who has started back talking, and chucking tantrums like a 2 year old....I think the extra long holidays (her school finished on Dec 6th) and a Mummy in her third trimester who doesn't have as much energy as usual is not helping! My DS goes back to Creche on Monday, and I have the day off work, so we are planning a Mummy & DD Shopping & Movies day which will be great.
Thank you for your suggestions. Marydean, I particularly like your suggestion of making her repeat what she wants to say until she says it in an acceptable manner. I just need to hold down my own frustration and temper to ensure I get her to do it in a calm way instead of escalating the situation. It really is respect that she is lacking for her father and I and she has suddenly developed Big Girl 'Tude. In order for her to respect us, we need to remain calm and behave like adults!
We usually play board games or card games after dinner as a family and both the 'big' kids love it (the bub is a bit small to join in!). We have tried the consequence of DD1 not being allowed to choose the game or not being allowed to play at all. I also make sure DD and I have plenty of 'mummy/DD' time and we've been very careful to make sure the new bub has not had a negative impact on Miss 7 or her brother. She loves her new sister and the problem started long before DD2 arrived.
DD2 was very careful today and she apologised without being prompted for her behaviour yesterday ("I don't wish you were dead, mummy..."!). I don't like the back char, but I think I dislike even more my own behaviour in response, the yelling and frustration. I'm the adult, right?
I will try all of your suggestions, thank you, and hopefully we will reach a point where DD1 will recognise the consequences of her actions and think before she speaks. I WILL be a calm and thoughtful (and consistent) parent. I hope we can get there without tears and yelling!!
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