This is more of a vent, and getting things unmuddled in my own head, more than a plea for advice.

I'm not sure how honest other mums are about motherhood and how much they enjoy or don't enjoy it, but for me, nearly every day is bad.
There are good moments often, but they are brief and never last.
There are too many bad moments to mention.

I find myself fruitlessly wishing for things which aren't going to happen -
my daughter's temperament isn't going to change, not anytime soon, anyway.
I'm not going to magically get any help, unless we win Lotto.
Yes, I can torture myself thinking about my next-door neighbour whose mother-in-law takes her twin girls OVERNIGHT a couple of times a month....
but that isn't going to happen for me. I haven't had half a day off, let alone overnight.

One day my daughter will sleep through the night, but maybe not for another year or even two years. I'm trying suggestions from the NCSS, but nothing has worked yet. Unfortunately I think the NCSS is more about getting parents to accept that their child will sleep through eventually, rather than solving anything.

I am so disappointed in my husband. He plays sport for 6 months of the year, and is captain of his team, and very involved in meetings etc. It takes up so much time!!
He has played for 8 years, and I feel like it's getting too much. I asked him to take next season off, and he said he will play every second week. So he can't even do that much for me. I told him I am having trouble coping, so he knows. But he won't even do this one thing. It is just one season off!!!

My life has been turned upside down since becoming a mum, but he has carried on as usual without having to make any sacrifices. I'm the one who isn't allowed a good night's sleep, I'm the one who is not allowed to have any time to myself.

I know I am supposed to stop thinking negative thoughts so it doesn't turn into a spiral, so that's what I will try to do. And just try to find joy in small things that make me happy. Because the 'big things' in life haven't worked out the way I hoped they would.