I'm really lucky that DH and I are in the position to have options, and that he agrees with my personal beliefs and values on parenting. One of the biggest ones is that kids need their parents, especially in the first few years of their life, so even before we fell pregnant with DD it was just never even a question of whether I would stay at home or go back to work.
Our plan, such as it was, was pretty much 'knock out the two kids before we're 25, career/mortgage/debt/travel will still be there when we're done taking time off work to have babies', and it's worked great for us. We were renting, which allowed us a fair bit of flexibility (ie much cheaper than mortgage repayments, and we could always get a cheaper place if we got really desperate), had no loans to pay off, basically it just made a lot more financial sense for one of us to be a stay-at-home parent - we worked on the basis that, seeing as neither DH nor I have any awesome qualifications or work history (I've only ever worked part-time stuff in retail and hospitality, DH never even finished high school and just worked manual labouring or lowly office jobs), the cost of day care etc would put us worse off on two incomes than if we were to live on just one, kwim? My entire weekly wage would go on daycare fees and things like nappies etc, whereas right now my parenting payments cover most of DD's stuff, her one day a week at daycare (instead of five) is subsidised (which means I can actually afford to send her), and I have the added benefit of being there to see her reach those milestones and just be her mummy full-time.

I'm using the time as a SAHM to do what I probably wouldn't have had the opportunity to do if I'd put off having kids - I'm just waiting until this new baby is born and we're in a routine, then I'm enrolling in TAFE courses in order to get qualifications that I need so I can get a job that I truly want to be in when the time comes to go back to work (whether part-time or full-time, we haven't decided which or when). I figure I have the best of both worlds - I achieved my goal of becoming a mum before I hit 25, and the bills are looked after while I do my studies, rather than turning my life upside down and having to budget every last cent in order to have kids because I've already got a career on track and then have to interrupt it, kwim? I'll be brutally honest - I'm one of those people who just hates to work, unless it's something I have an interest in. I could have become a secretary or continued working in retail and hospitality... but it's a pretty miserable existence when you're only going to work because you *need* the money or because you never had the opportunity to get into the field you truly have a passion for. DH agrees - he hates work, too, and despises the job he's in, but he knows one of us has to provide for the family and while he can earn over $20 and hour doing manual labour, and I can only hope for $16-$18 an hour working retail, it just makes sense for him to be the breadwinner. He's also doing TAFE courses to try and get more qualifications, so thankfully there is hope for him It's just that he's more restricted as he has to do night courses as he's at work all day.
So, that's another thing that works for me - yes, while being a young SAHM can sometimes be quite lonely (and, dare I say it, boring!), I'm lucky in that I don't feel any particular need or want to go back to work. I hear a lot of mums say, 'Oh God, I can't WAIT until Jaxon is old enough for kindy, I'm going out of my MIND not being around other grown-ups!' etc, and I just can't get my head around it! I just never had those great relationships with colleagues, and I never gained much satisfaction from working - more just a means to an end ($), so I don't feel that pressure to have that part of 'myself' back. If anything I'm much happier being in my pj's at 3pm and watching DD sit on her potty than I ever was at work!


As far as being applauded or looked down on by other people... well, I have to say that the majority of the time I feel like I'm looked down on for being lucky enough to stay at home with my babies.
Some people, I think, are resentful because they need the money so badly that they have to go back to work, others see a woman in her early 20's staying at home and instantly think, 'Lazy baby-bonus grabber', a lot more just think that I have it soooo easy because I'm not going to an office every day and getting b!tched at by my boss. A lot of the time I'm made to feel like my 'job' (and I feel that it is a job) isn't worthy, somehow, or that unless I'm a slave to my employer, I must not 'have it hard' the way *they* do. It's understandable when it's coming from people who don't have kids, as I know I never truly understood the trials of running a household and looking after kids until I had them (and DH to this day doesn't, because he's only home on weekends when I take the chance to do extra work around the place because DD is supervised by him), but I feel like I *really* cop it from working mums - again, whether that's resentment/jealousy because I have an option they don't, or that they feel I've got the easy end of the deal (and fair enough, they go to work and THEN come home to run a household, yikes!)... either way, it can be quite hurtful and isolating at times.

I don't think there's a 'right' or 'wrong' way to do things when it comes to SAH vs working parent... I just hate that SAHMs constantly feel derided, and have to justify themselves to others. Working parents, I have no doubt, suffer 'mummy guilt' and probably feel vilified by other people for 'dumping their kids' in daycare in order to chase the money. It's so hard no matter which way you look at it.
I'm just thankful that I have the options that I do, the opportunities that I do, the support from my family to follow my heart and my gut and do things the way I intended to since childhood - well before I understood anything about debt, career opportunities and life in general!