Is this child abuse?

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I think colour-bond is a good idea, but it's a pain in the proverbial to put up, and we can't get a professional to come out here and do it, we are just too far out... it's also rather expensive and whilst it might be a nicer avenue than an electric fence, it is going to cost around $6000 to put it up around our entire yard, not something we could afford until we get the baby bonus from the new bubby, and that is 8 months away at least! lol... I would think by then he would be a bit more understanding about the dangers etc..

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Hate to put a dampener on this one, but my DS2 sounds much like your DS - and he went right over a full height colourbond without any help. There was a retaining wall under the colourbond on the other side too making it an about 8ft drop on the other side and he did it without injury or fear.

DS2 has sensory intergration disorder - specifically vestibular hypo-sensitivities.

I know this isn't much, but my drastic measure was a child harness. He was 'attached' to me all day. Not easy as I had a baby and 3 older kids. I almost cried with joy when school started for him. At least, until he escaped class, the school grounds and walked home without anyone noticing. The school was obviously very apologetic, but that was my boy.

Interestingly, it stopped when his dad quit his job and started working from home, so they could well be onto something.

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:hug: I would put the fence up. He will ultimately learn how to climb under it/through it like we did on the farm, but it will stop him.

Also, I would get some slide bolts for the doors - put them up the top of the door so they ram home to the top of the door jamb.
He won't be able to reach them, even from a chair.

The other thing I am sure you are already doing it talking with him about the dangers of running off - he is old enough now to grasp some of the really basic concepts about hurting himself, losing mummy etc. Keep reinforcing that point, esp now you are UTD - things will only get harder to chase after.

:hug: Put the fence up. It is not child abuse, it is simply what will work, keep him safe, and you sane. He will not hurt himself, and no, he is not a cow, but even children need to learn the hard way sometimes.

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:yeahthat:

Agree with Nae and some other posters - if there's already some hot fences around, a low voltage number, as a secondary fence (yes, double up on fences), could be an effective back up?
My DS can climb and reach things, and unlike your boy and Christy's Matilda, he hasn't got a sheer determination to escape - he just wants to get to THINGS, not places. Pool fences don't keep him out because he loves to swim. So, I don't have the extent of your problem, but I'm a bit familiar with it (as all valuables and permanent markers live on pelmuts in the house we're in now), and also moving to a farm (only 160acres, though) with dangers.
Currently, there's a creek not 50 metres from the caravan site, a road directly alongside the caravan (supposedly only used by next door, because the road belongs to us, but a stranger caned it down the road on Saturday evening and caned back, completely ignoring the "Children" sign at the bridge :rolleyes: ), two dams also within 50 metres and some very recent snake sightings (at least the last one was just a red belly, in the van yard - DP mentioned that snake repelling thingy the other week!). My DD shows more propensity for wandering off, for wandering's sake, so finding your post today is really timely for me!
We have electric fences along the boundaries and even within paddocks. DS knows about these because he put his hand on a strand when he was out on an evening wombat hunt with DP (after being warned not to touch it!), so he's wary. He's also 4.5, and I couldn't say whether he would have learned quickly about fences at 2.5.
DD is 15 mo and isn't exactly conversing, yet (in order to reason with her), and closing gates is quickly becoming ineffective - she's climbing halfway up, these days.
Anyway, it had occurred to me, before seeing it written by some other posters, that angled fencing may be something to try. You would probably prefer some visibility to the outside world, even if just for safety, and want to keep the chain fencing. Angling would involve a climb AND supporting one's own body weight. Just not sure what you support the angle with - if it's with posts, then a quick shimmy will get him over the fence!
Being expected to be on top of another human being, with his own volition and spirit is not only dehumanising to him, but also to you, when you have obligations to yourself, soon another human, and to run the household. I hate that societal expectation that mothers need to have a 24hr eye on their children and sole responsibility. In your case, it's a bit trickier, because there is no village you can call on to take over from you.
I agree with the behavioural check.
I'm guessing that with limited funds for a fence, there's not much chance of affording a nanny. If it takes electricity in the interim, no condemnation from me. I feel for ya!

can you put bars on the windows? It can be a temporary thing that you remove once he's old enough to understand the dangers? Also take the key out. Even if you take it to bed with you tied around your wrist every night or put on your necklace chain. I wouldn't even consider an electric fence. If you put something on the windows so he can't get out even if he can open them, and you deadbolt the doors and keep the keys on you at all times, he can't get out.

Also I totally understand your frustration, Ash escapes all the time and crosses the road which is dangerous because of the idiots living around the corner and how they drive. Just today he did it and we'd only just got back from a walk, I went inside to put the baby down and heard a car beep and ran out and he's across the road with his scooter. Scary scary scary.