Encopresis and my four year old - Warning TMI (soiling)

[lilmisshavachat]

Hi Ladies..

I have searched this entire site for any information or support surrounding Encopresis and couldn't find anything. I have a four year old son and for a very long time we have been tearing our hair out as he was showing no interest in doing poo in the toilet but would constantly have accidents and he didn't seen to realise he had done it. We yelled, we punished, we praised and rewarded any effort but nothing seemed to work. It was a constant battle just to get him to sit on the toilet and try. He started Pre-prep this year and it wasn't until the school called us in and pretty much said he isn't toilet trained and he probably shouldn't stay that we started to investigate the issue. So we went to a Paed and was told about Encopresis and that this was Ethan 's problem, he put us onto Ozmalax and recommended an occupational therapist which we have been seeing but when Ethan had a horror day at Pre-prep (4 soiled undies in a day) I started to do more research. I had naievely thought that a bit of a laxative, some exercises and he would be fixed. The more I read the more scared and concerned I become about this condition and I guess I just wanted to see if I could find any Aussie Mums going through the same thing. I use to be on this site all the time when I was going through IVF as the support was fantastic and it is here that I am turning in the hope to find kindred spirits in the fight against Poo and some support as it is breaking my heart to see my little man suffer.

Cheers
Dee

[Liviam]

Hope you can get some support for yourself and your little man.

[~TT40~]

Sorry Hun, I've never heard of it. But hope you get some support and answers soon.

[black_rose]

We have been through this, only just getting through it now. We used osmolax for a year, swapped to lactulose in the end as an xray showed her tummy was still full of poo. We had to completely overhaul dd's diet. No bananas, sultanas or processed food like breads, biscuits etc. we encouraged lots of other fruits, baked beans, chia seeds on everything and lots of water.
We had issues at kinder as the carers were very harsh and scared dd which is why she held on the had accidents which then caused the build up. We have had a few issues with holding on and not asking to go to school but it's much better now. it's a combination of things on her mind and forgetting to go that's the biggest issue now.

[lilmisshavachat]

Thanks for the support Liviam and TT40..

Thank you too for the response black_rose.. Did you find much help in the community or did you handle this yourselves? How hard did you find it on a daily basis? I just bought Soiling Solutions Clean Kid manual and am hoping this will help guide us. We are having a problem with our son at Pre-prep as they aren't liking the clean up but Ethan also has some sensory issues which are an issue as well so a couple of things we are working through at the same time.. I'm glad you are having some easier times..

Cheers
Dee

[Olive]

I can't help you, but please don't let the pre prep centre discriminate against you and this issue, it's something they have to deal with dispite their protest.
Xxx

[black_rose]

We tried an incontinence nurse but dd didn't respond to her very well. Dd knew what to do she just had trouble with getting timing right because she had been holding on too long and had problems with leakage. We ended up seeing a nutritionist who changed over her diet she was great and dd listened to her and reminded me if she had the wrong foods. Our gp ended up being helpful too in swapping over the meds, he was great in handling dd without making her feel bad. We had issues with staff wanting to help clean up too, which is part of the reason dd took so long to get over it as she was scared of having an accident she would leave it too long up go and the cycle would continue. It improved for her once the staff member left but it still took a year to recover properly. It might help if you give your pre kinder information flyers they need to change tactics and support you both.

[Bumperstump Cummerbund]

Wow, reading about that, it sounds exactly like what my youngest nephew has! I thought he was 'sucking' the poo back in, but the leakage makes sense. And my goodness, I've never smelt anything nearly as bad. We throw his soiled underwear out, because you just can't get the smell out.

Having said all that, we're pretty sure we've fixed it now. Through a combination of regular parachoc, and sitting in the toilet with him and encouraging, he's gotten out the impacted stuff and is now going regularly by himself. He does have the occasional accident, generally because he's too busy playing, but it's much better and the smell is more normal.

So don't panic darl, because it can be as simple as laxatives and persistence. I really found that he turned a corner one particular day when I sat on the floor of the toilet while he was on there - he'd already soiled 3 times, so I forced him on to the toilet because he obviously needed to go. We sat there for about 45 minutes, and most of the time he was happy, but then he'd get shouty and aggressive when the poo was coming out, so I'd put my hands just above his knees to keep him there, and tell him over and over to 'relax, it's good, let the poos out, they can't stay inside cos they're making you sick, relax'. He did 2 or 3 poos in that time, and then when he got off he wanted to look at them while I wiped his bum. He also wanted me to leave them there until his Dad got home so he could show him! For a little while after that, when he farted we'd put him on the toilet and sit with him until he'd done it, plus he was having the parachoc every day. And now he takes himself off 98% of the time. And he also makes a big deal about waving goodbye to the poos when we flush

[~clover~]

My 6 year old ds is chronically constipated. But because he had stuff coming out, I had no idea it was even possible :/ so I completely understand your frustration.
DS is in year 1 at school. He had big issues last year in pre primary (first year full time), but our school dealt with it & did whatever was needed. If he needed a change at school, they'd actually meet me outside to avoid embarrassment & they'd clean him up & deal with it. I wasn't once asked to take him home, or even deal with anything more than his clothes in a plastic bag when he got home.
I will be forever grateful for their discretion & encouragement. I'd be quite disappointed if he was excluded for a medical condition.