Wow sounds stressful!!! Hope you guys have recovered. Can DH give DS a special bear (maybe make one) to cuddle when he is not there? Maybe explain it and make a big deal? It has often taken a while to settle into new routines and sounds like you have had a few big changes all at once.
I have just put both kids in with me but it took a while for the older one to get in the swing as she was pretty jealous of DD2.
xxxxxxx
i think that's a really great idea, something that DS can associate with his dad that he can cuddle or whatever when he's missing him? maybe even spray some of DH's cologne or something on it so it smells like him?

but that sounds hard to you. i think just keep trying, it might take a while for the kids to get used to it, especially DS, but eventually if you keep the routine it will *hopefully* start getting easier xxx