Mak, we have come across similar. Even her bestie, saying "if you wear those pants again, i will throw you over the fence" - and bilby BELIEVES it, is fearful to wear those pants again. An adult can reason, that child doesn't have the strength to throw a child over the fence, but my child was scared and believed it.

She never complained about the threats and the bullying from her bestie, just accepted it, but when other kids bullied her (trapping her under a plastic big round rocking thing - big enough for three kids to fit under -, the kids sitting on it and refusing to let her out, they thought it was funny to trap the little kid - she was screaming and they wouldn't release her - i made sure all the kindy staff knew about that, the director tried to make a joke out of it, but i thought that was very serious and not a joking matter at all. Part of the reason i am always so anxious about her lack of eating, she is always the smallest in her age group, and i know the law of the playground, smallest kids usually get picked on more. Survival of the fittest and all that.

i've been teaching bilby - if a child doesn't want to play with you, they might need/want some alone time, or to play with other people, and that's ok, because another time, they will want to play with you. So once they say no, or are not interested, just say "see you later" and play with someone else - and that's ok. My DD was stuck on "she said no, now i don't know what to do", so giving her another option/s, has helped. I hadn't realised that i would need to point that out, it seemed obvious to me, but not obvious to my DD. It was a big concern for her, she hung onto every word when we discussed it (i thought she would ignore whatever i said).

My DD gets upset because of other kids not following rules too, when she sees other kids not covering their mouths when coughing, breaking plants, using toys in hurtful ways etc. The kindy catchphrase is "that child is learning", not "that child is being naughty". I must admit, that did not fly well with me, the day she was trapped against her will, by a number of kids. In other situations, i get it.