when i had my DS i was dead against co sleeping for this very reason.. he was 2 hours old when we first co slept
he will be 5 in sept and our DD will be 3 next month. both still come in to our bed at some point in the night. BUT both go to bed SO easily now compared to when we were trying to force the issue.
i think having a chat with DH why he is so upset by it all? he needs that comfort.. and surely there are other times you (as a couple) could attend to your relationship