OMG! What is she going to be like when the baby comes?!

[UntoldAngel]

I don't have any experience of my own, but I would guess it is just the age and it will pass
Could you maybe set aside an hour where your time is dedicated to her and her only?

[Kazbah]

oh no, Pip's still going through this! I find that I give him a choice of 2 things only - "It's snacktime, do you want an apple or watermelon". Is she helping you at all? You know, like "Can you get my slippers out from under the bed?" "Can you get me the purple blocks"?

We also taught Pip "inside voice" and "outside voice" and that he's only to use outside voice when he can't see us at all. Plus I can't bend over to give him cuddles, so I taught him that he needed to stand on a chair if he wanted cuddles, and we give him cuddles instead of picking him up when we're out.

Good luck - it is so ... frustrating ... when they are like this!!!

[~clover~]

Its hard. My DS is similar. We've had a few issues with the new baby, but he's getting there.
He's very proud & protective of her. Loves her alot & insists I pick her up the second she cries, but if I'm already holding her & he wants something all hell breaks loose. He will stand there yelling at me to do as he wants. Which keeps her awake, so I can't put her down, & can't usually get what he wants.
I'm trying not to get what he wants, when he wants, & get him used to it. Slowly he's getting it. It doesn't help that DD has reflux & can rarely be put down. I was hoping for an easy baby, lol.
Do you talk to her about it? I talked to DS about it for months before she was born. He was really well prepared I think. Accepted it very well initially, but didn't understand just how busy I would be.
He's getting there, I'm sure she will too

[littlelara]

I always made a point of trying to create a bond between them. Pretty much as soon as Jordy could open his eyes I would say "see, Jordy's watching you, he really loves you, look he's smiling at you!" She believed it and was loving towards him, which helped him to learn how to be loving towards here.
Also, try to give her responsibilities once bub comes - "you're such a good helper, can you go and get bub a clean nappy and the wipes? Could you watch bub while I...?"
HTH

[sasha]

Thanks for your responses, and I've been thinking this over, and I think the issue is that I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed with all the attention she seems to need, so I withdraw from her, which makes her feel insecure/want more attention, and it just compounds itself. I'm trying really hard to spend some time playing with them rather than trying to get them to just play on their own, and doing stuff like sitting down and watching a TV show with her while having a cuddle - it's good for me to take some time to just sit, too!

She does know about the baby, and we're working on tasks that she can do... she also knows about soft and loud voices, and I think she's just impulsive and forgets herself! I think she's finally getting it that screaming at me for something doesn't work, because when she stands there whinging or screaming, I tell her I'll only listen if she talks nicely, and mostly, she's then toning it down a little and talking in a fairly normal voice. I feel a bit mean telling her I'm not listening (unless she talks nicely) but I also really hate being screamed at!

She's still full on, but I think that's just her A lot can happen in the next few months, right?!