Thanks all. I now do a combination of sleep in cot and co-sleeping/ in arms. I mostly enjoy the times when I do hold him now as it is not all day long. I've also noticed that we can get him resettled into a second sleep cycle if he's really tired eg had a big day but otherwise it's just no go. As the night times have gotten a bit better though I'm not so stressed anymore about day stuff and am able to just go with the flow more. Certainly over spending all day getting my son to sleep when I can enjoy playing with him instead :-).