Things I will never say to my daughter...

[YoYo]

"I did it alone and so you can too" um.... Ok for you, but I don't WANT to do things alone. I like people!

And on the flip side of sushee's comments above "ergh men, who needs them, I'd rather a dog than a man" 1. That's my dad you're talking about, and 2. just because you're too proud to admit you had any impact in a failed relationship, doesn't mean I don't want want a man either. I'm open, man or not, just happy as I am.

And... Last but not least, If my daughter says she's tired coz her babies have kept her awake... I will NOT say "oh, I'm so tired, woke up at xyz and couldn't sleep" gah! How about not about you for a second!


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[Smoke Jaguar]

I will never tell her (or her brother, for that matter) that she is more beautiful than x (i.e. anyone else). She will be told she is beautiful on her own merits and not at the expense of what anyone else has to offer. I guess it did teach me about how destructive comparisons are and make me aware of when someone was doing it in the false sense of raising their self-esteem
No way will I ever say that she's selfish or lazy. Actions *may* be those things, and people are not. They are not things you carry around like a scar, or a tattoo you can't remove.
My daughter will never be 'too' anything.
I will never lead her to believe that my opinion is the last word on anything. Sounds trivial, but an example is when I used to think Jo Pearson was beautiful and I would look forward to watching her read the news. I was about 10 or 12. I made the mistake of telling my mum one night (who took it as a criticism of her and a rejection of her own looks - I say now with the hindsight of undiagnosed Borderline Personality Disorder), and she vehemently told me that Jo Pearson was NOT beautiful, she was UGLY. I questioned my opinion on aesthetics for many, many years after that, and for a few more years would ask her opinion on someone's beauty before forming my own opinion
Sadly, my mum has already done this to DS, when DS told her with his gorgeous heart that he thought Bindi Irwin was beautiful. He was so confused, and even months later would ask me about it to check that he wasn't 'wrong'.

[forshelby]

I have some beauties from my Mum.

"Your DS never sleeps? Well you never slept for me either. Serves you right".
"I have no idea how you're coping after everything that happened to you" (she says this, while lounging around on my couch looking at the piles of housework I couldn't do post-surgery)
"Don't expect me to run around after you doing all your cleaning when I come to visit" (she came to 'help' after DS was born. Correction, she flew across the state to sit on my couch and sneer at me, plus drag me around taking her shopping for 5 hours plus at a time, whilst my surgical wound leaked through my dressings and clothes.)

I have more.... I'll be back.

[Elocin]

"Your DS never sleeps? Well you never slept for me either. Serves you right".

I haven't even had my baby yet, and I'm already hearing "I hope your baby is a terrible sleep like you were... payback's a *****"