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Thread: Throwing toys...

  1. #1

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    Default Throwing toys...

    DS is now 15 months old, and while he doesn't often throw things, sometimes he'll throw something either out of boredom, frustration or annoyance (well, those are the emotions that I perceive he is feeling at the time...). Because it doesn't happen often (he's never been a big "thrower", and never even got in the habit of throwing food off the highchair which I know a lot of children do) I generally just tend to tell him "Uh uh! No throwing!" in a stern voice and take the toy away.

    I took him to a new playgroup this week and it's a lot more strict than his old playgroup because the new one is a Montessori group. He's the youngest in the group, so I don't expect him to behave exactly like all the other kids. At one point he was playing with a toy that was basically little wooden colored rings that you stack on the matching colored sticks. He was playing nicely with it, but then started throwing the rings instead. Of course the annoying little things had to roll away as well, so it made it more obvious that I was chasing thrown objects, lol. I told him "Uh uh! No throwing!" as usual and I tried taking the rings away from him and giving them to him one at a time. But he'd put a couple on the sticks and then start pulling them off and throwing them again. In the end I took them off him and put the toy away, but of course he got upset by that and started what I knew were the beginnings of a tanty. Because I know they like to keep a calm, peaceful environment there, I scooped him up and took him to get a new toy, but I wasn't sure if I was just rewarding bad behaviour...



    What would be the "right" thing to do in this sort of situation? I obviously want to teach DS that throwing is not acceptable, but I guess I'm also worried about looking "bad" or being embarrassed in front of the other parents when their children seem to be playing and working so nicely.

  2. #2

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    I don't know the answer - but would love to find out as my boy throws a LOT of stuff (he's got a good arm too! ) and I'm often unsure of how to react... especially in public

  3. #3

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    my son was very similar at that age i used to get so embarressed cause he would do it at the most random times eg. shopping, dinners etc.. i think you get the picture.. I guess he sort of grew out of it but i used to take the toy off him and not give it back no matter what he did too teach him its wrong.. as for the others they should realise that he is a toddler experimenting with his boundaries and you as a responsible mother have to do what you need to do to teach him things in life, its a playgroup not a school exam and if they know better tell them to show you better.. kids will be kids and some kids arent the angels other people think their kids are.. Cause they all are but its all a learning process and they should support that. just my opinion

  4. #4

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    jamie pretty much throws anything if hes frustrated and its not fun when im in the firing line but at least he stopped heatbutting the floor coz i'd say that was a lot more painful for him he also does another thing where he'll be walking and he'll just throw things in his way over his shoulder

  5. #5

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    It's actually comforting to know that this s fairly common and that I'm not the only one that's felt embarrassed by it in public. My concern at the playgroup was that the other mothers might be looking at me thinking that I'm going about it all wrong, and that perhaps I might be. I guess there's no magic answer as to how to deal with things like this though.

    Things must have been much better than I thought at the playgroup though, because at the end the lady that runs it told me how good he was for his first session, especially considering he was the youngest and in a new environment. I should stop questioning myself so much and just give myself a pat on the back more often

  6. #6

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    thats sooo right there is no quick solution to being a mother and there is no rules and guidelines its a learning curb continously for us all everyday for ever....

  7. #7

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    Our major problem is that DS does it with food.. and we can't just take it away as punishment because he's supposed to be eating it!!

    He doesn't eat enough as it is, so we don't want to discourage his eating.. very vicious circle. *sorry to hijack*!

    I hope you're feeling more 'normal' now!

  8. #8

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    The throwing itself is not a huge worry to me... unless it's going to break the toy.
    The throwing AT someone is my main issue (although it's my 3 YO who does it on the odd occasion).
    I'm not sure how to stop it. I think it's something they grow out of. I'm sure it's just another way of them learning how the things in the world work.
    Sorry... no real advice. Pointless post really.

  9. #9

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    I think you did the best possible thing Krystie, by taking the toy off him and moving onto the next activity (or toy) you are just distracting him and stimulating him with something new (and therefore giving him an opportunity to stop or change the behaviour)

    This tends to 'work' for lack of a better word with Bailey. He throws toys at times, and I just either pick him up and move him to the other side of the playroom (or ignore it as sometimes he is looking for a reaction from me - I think he is trying to make me laugh LOL)

    Keep telling him the behaviour you want from him though as I reckon even at this young age they understand WAY more than we give them credit for Cheeky little buggers hehehehe

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