Screw taking him out of the house! What a load of crap. He should stay home and get some stuff DONE.
You need to give yourself an RDO. Give him advanced warning. Let's say you do it next Saturday, or some other day when you have no commitments. You do whatever you want (sleep, knit, read, bake something fun, whatever) He looks after the baby. And the house. Every time he goes to leave the baby with you, you say "Sorry, I'm on my day off" and politely refuse. You do not feed, settle to sleep, calm, anything. It's your day off. Tell him a week before, and tell him you just want the one day off - it will sound like just a small favour. If you want, tell him he can do whatever he wants the next day. It will give him a good appreciation of how your day actually rolls. And if the house is a mess, you get your chance to go off your tree at him just like he does to you.
I had great success with the NCSS. I skipped the recording bit - I knew that we were having crappy nights, so I really just noted what time her earliest waking was, and assumed it was between 1 and 2 hourly from there. I also noticed when it got better, without writing anything down.
That 17-18-19 week stormy period was ROUGH here. Sleeping was atrocious, and even the sling didn't make things better (although the hammock was pretty good) It was about that time that we started sticking to routines and developing firm rituals aroound sleep - nothing prescribed by anyone, just noting the patterns she was naturally falling into. As she emerged from that Wonder Week episode, we took off travelling, and all routine was thrown out the window. We just let her grab whatever sleep she could, whether we fed her off to sleep on the floor of the tent, or did laps in the pram, or in the carrier or the capsule. Being outside all the time and in new surroundings, she became exhausted and her night sleeps improved a lot.
So, ummm, go camping?
I dunno if that's helpful. (ETA: Fully sure it's not. Sorry!) But I promise that this Wonder Week will pass, so the screaming days will settle down. Do what you can to support him, know that it won't be like this forever, and enjoy what you can.
lol, camping. Yeah an RDO would be nice! I used to have Saturday nights 'off' and get a full nights sleep. That stopped because DP would pull an allnighter instead of getting DS to sleep. I get that it's hard because he's used to sleeping in bed with mummy. So it evolved into- I'll cuddle him all night, and DP gets up to feed, then returns him to me to sleep. Then it changed again, and suddenly DP 'couldn't' even do the feed. If he does get up to him, I can hear DP muttering and swearing, crashing and bashing around in the kitchen making as much noise as he can. This wakes DS up completely, and me. Then DP complains and says I should get up and go to work for him one day of the week (in return for him doing my job for one night). I know he finds it hard, but OMG.
He promised me he'd give me sat and sun to sleep in a few weeks ago, taking DS out for Daddy Son breakfast. That hasn't happened. Now he's called me and said he'll be home late. He doesn't have a choice, so I'm not mad, just disappointed. So there goes tonights break. And I was SO looking forward to bleaching the shower, lol. DP says he'll still look after DS tonight but I'm 90% sure it'll just be until midnight or so, then I'm back on duty all night long.
I guess this has turned into a huge whinging vent. I'm just so sad that DP could go from superdad to this so fast. It's like the novelty wore off. In my family, the mothers needs come last.
i was thinking something along the lines of reflux or gas or colic due to the fact that he cant seem to find a comfy position. maybe a cold coming on, maybe teething already? maybe you could take him to a GP just for a check up and a chat also. i found with my DD1 she hated the cot, so we co-slept and i do admit that always worked but i also tried sleeping her on a mattress on the floor in a safe area during the day and at night when i tried to lessen the co-sleeping as she grew bigger. apart from that you NEED and RDO! having a few hours/ half a day/ evening off does wonders and it will get your partner to understand what is actually involved in looking after a baby and what you do ALL day every day.
in regards to the book.. we used it with DD1 and it gradually improved her sleeping over time but it didnt solve it straight away.
He still isn't home. And the oven just blew up when I tried to cook dinner. And he says he's quitting his job tonight. Just like that. I have a headache.
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I have a headache.
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