i have to say, and my opinion may not be wanted here, but i will give it, that i joined bb to give support to other women, and to gain support when i really need it. to have other mothers tell me that what im doing is psychologically damaging to my child, wrong and evil is horrific for me to hear. I never felt TH said i was doing it wrong when i read the book (cover to cover), but when i read your comments well i have never felt more criticised and judged in my life. isnt this site supposed to be about positive support? there are ways to say things and ways not to. perhaps something like, "for those who arent so sure about TH's methods have you thought of reading Pinky McKay or another author" or "If you thought SOS was good for you, do you know about these other authors/methods etc i found them great, and they may also be of assistance to you and give you a different spin on things?" wouldn't these sorts of comments be more rational and helpful?

As a first time mother, i felt completely lost, i was at the point where i thought i couldnt go on, sleep deprivation (my DD only slept 3 hours total of any given 24 hour period from 2-6weeks) emotionally exhausted from the 9 yes without exageration, 9 hours of ear piercing, inconsolable screaming each day (which was diagnosed as "colic"), the 12 hours of bf each day, lack of support from my DH, no milk till day 9, then low supply which meant when i wasnt bf i was pumping to build my supply up, mastitis for over a week, the list goes on, all of these things meant i was at my wits end, and honestly considered walking away from it all. then i read sos, it made some sense, i didnt believe it worked but i was willing to try anything. from sos i gained a lot of good tips for winding/"colic", reflux (later my dd was diagnosed with this hence the screaming early on), recognising tired signs, understanding my dd's cries and what they signalled, the need for day sleeps etc. i kept getting told to recognise the tired signs, and read the type of cry, however saying that to a first time mother is like the pav metaphor in earlier posts, you say i need eggs and strawberries, but what do i do with them?? in other words, what specifically are the tired signs? what types of cries are there and how do you distinguish them? sos lists things to watch and listen for and made me more aware of my dd's needs. i had also decided to give up bf (with great distress to me) at 6 weeks, once i put her on sos i found the energy to push through bf problems and continue it, i felt as though a weight had been lifted, my dd actually slept, which allowed me to rest too! i let her cio for one night, after that i never had to for weeks as she simply didnt cry anymore. she now has a cry often, however shes teething so im pretty sure that explains that, i dont use cio on her now. anyway my point is, some of the posts in this thread are not supportive to other mothers, there are people who have said read it with an open mind, and i agree, as there may be something that you take away from reading sos, even if all you get from it is "it's not for me".

i have read recently some pinky mckay stuff, and i found her "top up before you go to bed" distinctly similar to TH's dreamfeed, among other things i found had similarities. I think theres something to be said for ALL so called "experts" and if you choose to do some research and get some tips from these "experts" theres no reason you cant take a tip from each of them that suits you and fits your family best and give it a try.