Cruz died at home on Friday afternoon, with our vets help, and it was as peaceful as we could make it for him. He had lots of gentle cuddles in the garden, some shaved ham, and constant reassurance of our love. Afterwards we hugged and kissed him, stroked his ears, and let Tobi see his body. I couldn't watch, but DF buried him under a shady tree near the house.

Tobi is a little clingier than usual, but seems to be coping ok. It is a blessing that I am on mat. leave and can be home with him a lot during the day, and we are giving him lots of attention. The hardest part is simply tripping over all the memories in the house, as Cruz is everywhere around us... two bowls, two leads, two beds, but only one set of paws padding down the timber hallway. Its so hard, and I think it will be a long time before I feel happy again (46 days, according to my ticker...), but I thank you all for giving me this outlet to grieve