i recently did a positive parenting course, and before working on the 'issues', we spent time trying to build up the child's emotional piggy bank (recognising the good things they do, and praising them as often as possible). this created more positive behaviour, and also helped us to see the good things she was doing.

check out your local community centre or health nurse, and ask if there is anything in the local area. mine was done via telephone call once a week and has made a big difference to our house.