Here's a tough one...

[Beth]

Hello all!

I'm a newbie on here... I'm six weeks pregnant, but am very confused about the caculated dates and such... I could be five or seven weeks... I don't know, but my pregnancy test was an overwhelming "YOU ARE PREGNANT!!!", so that's good.

But, here is my dilemma - I am job hunting at the moment, and have been shortlisted for a very exciting job... I will find out in a few days if I get the job or not. So, what do I do? Should I tell them straight up that I am pregnant and will only be able to commit to roughly six months of work?

That sounds like the right thing to do, but it's all very difficult. Especially with the vagueness and tiredness that I'm presently experiencing!

What would you do?

(thanks!)

[Ginger]

personally, i would want to tell them, but might end up not telling them iykwim? it is quite unethical though. i mean, if they think you're the best person for the job then it shouldn't matter that you're pregnant. i don't know, it's a hard one...i would feel bad about it, but i know dp would tell me not to tell them if we were in that situation. if you don't take this job is there another job you could do for 6 months? maybe something more casual?

[LisaBear]

its more up to your conscience.
i got a new job then fell pregnant like 3 weeks later and i lost the job.... not saying this wil hapen to you though, if you feel comfortable workign then when you start to gert really bad symptoms let them know in a small chat, you never know they might just not care!!!!

my DH says dont tell, its not their business, its yours....

[dee73]

Yeah - legally you don't have to tell them as it shouldn't be a deciding point in them picking you, but I'd personally feel a moral obligation to tell. I wouldn't want to get a reputation if it's a company I'd like to try and get another job with later on. If you don't tell them and do get the job, they might not take you back afterwards and you might have burnt you bridges. Does that make sense. Way to put a damper on your exciting news hey? Sorry...

[mgm]

congratulations on your pregnancy!

i don't mean to be the voice of pessimism here, but you need to consider how you'd feel if you told them, didn't get the job (or were given a six-month contract) but things didnt' work out with the pregnancy. my own experience has taught me that it's sometimes better to withhold this kind of info. on the other hand, i completely understand why you'd feel it's not right not to tell. it's a difficult one. i think maybe go with whatever feels 'right' to you. Good luck and best wishes for a H&H pregnancy!

[citygal]

I am currently in this situation myself. I have just found out that I am pregnant and I am a temp at my current job. They are going to be making it permanent and advertising it very soon. I have decided not to tell them that I am pregnant as I figure that, yes they will need to give me 6 months of maternity leave, but they will get years of quality employment from me when I return

In my last job, (which was for a major bank who prides themselves on being mother friendly -ha) as soon as they found out that I was pregnant they tried to take a new promotion off me and also said I could'nt have it when I returned. I ended up having to involve the union and threaten them with all sorts of things to get them to back off. I didn't end up returning after maternity leave mainly because of the way they continued to treat me after this all happened.

So after that experience I guess you could say once bitten twice shy.

[{sarah}]

You are not obliged to tell your employer that you are pregnant until 6 weeks before you plan on taking maternity leave, so really it's up to you. They can't not give you the job because of pregnancy, but you'd never know if that was the real reason for not getting the job IYKWIM.

[Beth]

Wow! Thanks for all your responses girls!

It turns out that they offered me the job, and I told them straightaway.

They are a very small company, and quite flexible (not to mention just nice people!)... so I actually felt quite comfortable in being open about everything.

They were completley fine with it and are going to give me a six month contract. So hoorah! It has all worked out okay!

Weird thing is, I have now told a complete stranger about my pregnancy, but not my parents!

Heh heh... it's my dad's birthday soon, and we are going to give him a "Happy Birthday Grandad" card.

I can't wait!

Thanks again everyone!

[PinkPalace]

I was ask by my boss to apply for the permanent position coming up when i was 36 weeks pregnant. They said that they cannot legally deny me the job because i am pregnant. So i wouldnt tell them - especially seeing it is early days and it really isnt any of their business as long as you give the correct amount of notice which i think is 10 weeks prior to leave for maternity

[Ozziehoffy]

I was in a similar position and I did tell because I couldn't not tell because of my conscience. I figure the same as Gracie said, if you're right for it then it shouldn't matter, this doesn't mean that they will think that way though. There is IMO still discrimination with this. I looked for some temp work whilst pg but got knocked back and I know myself it was because I was pg. You do what you feel is right, for me it's a moral and ethical thing and I feel I'm lying if I don't.

[Jodie259]

It's a bit of a tough call.

I am an employer myself. I would hate it if I employed a person, trained them all up and then discovered that they were pregnant the whole time - and never told me.
It is expensive to hire a person. And a lot of hassle. Setting up workcover and superannuation and taxes.

Also... there is someone else applying for that position who is wanting that job for the long term. Who can give the job 100% now and in the future. And if you were to get the position - they miss out.

And you will not be sure about your morning sickness. With both of my pregnancies... the morning sickness knocked me about so much - there was no way I could have even driven to work - let alone do any work.

Having said all that... if you tell them that you're pregnant right at the start - they can decide whether to take on those responsibilities or not. But my guess is that they wouldn't. And you would miss out on the position.

If I was pregnant, and looking for work - I would be joining an agency and getting temp work. It pays better, and you can have breaks whenever you don't feel so great.

[2 please]

Hi, I have a large business which has been running for the last 11 years. I agree with Jodie259.

Good luck.
Im sure you will make the right choise.

[Nelle]

Having said all that... if you tell them that you're pregnant right at the start - they can decide whether to take on those responsibilities or not. But my guess is that they wouldn't. And you would miss out on the position.

But isn't that discrimination? If you choose not to employ someone solely because they're pregnant??

Anyway, that's all hypothetical, so probably doesn't matter too much anyway. Glad everything worked out fine for you Beth.

[hannahfroodoo]

Beth - that's great that it all worked out for the best. Double congratulations to you on the new job AND the pregnancy!! A new job is a fabulous way to make your pregnancy fly by.
It must be strange to have told them but not your own family!! I think you did the right thing - imagine how you would feel now if you hadn't told them - it would always be at the back of your mind making you feel guilty.
I recommended a friend for a job with my company and she was offered the job based on my recommendation. Then the weekend before she was due to start, she told me she was a couple of months pregnant but wasn't planning on telling the company. It put me in a really really difficult position and I wish she had just been honest with them upfront. I don't think it was fair to treat the company like that.

[SammyRo]

I'm in a similar position. I'm a teacher, currently on a contract for this year, and I was hoping to at least get a contract at the school next year, but won't find out until the last week of next term. BUt now I'm preg, with an edd in early June, so half way throguh term 2. Legally, I don't have to tell them that I'm preg, but don't want bad feelings between me and the principal if i do get the contract and then have to take maternity leave. However, selfishly, I need a job, and so don't want to let them know until I have definitly got the contract. THe difference I suppose in my position is that its not a business, its a governemnt school, and I don't need any training, etc. Plus, its such a hard to staff school, that the school wants to hang on to the staff its got already. Its still a dilemma. (sorry if this is long! and hopefully makes sense)