What have you told people who guessed you were pregnant, before 12 weeks?

[veus]

We had a wedding at a winery. I claimed too hungover from visiting the other wineries prior to wedding.


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[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

TBH, with Stormy all I plan to do is ask "how rude are you?" if people want to "guess" if I'm pg. People do that now and last time I just said "No. What, am I getting too much of a belly or something?" Point out that it is a rude thing to say to a woman (which I do) - either because she isn't pregnant or she doesn't want you to know.

If more women told people it was a rude question, people would soon stop asking. And given the amount of stress this seems to cause on BB, it clearly is a question that is getting ruder and ruder.

[beansbeans!]

Every time I was asked about being pregnant before we announced I just blew it off by saying 'nah, you have to dtd for that to happen, well unless I change my name to Mary' And that normally stopped any further comments

[blessedatlast]

Why do so many people hide their pregnancies? I can understand from bosses, or people that may not be close (work acquaintances etc) but why hide it from your friends?? Especially if they guess.. I could understand not mentioning it, but to go to so much trouble to conceal it is a very strange concept to me.. Especially til 12 weeks.. If you had a M/C wouldn't you want the support of friends? I am also of the opinion that there is never a 'safe' time, so the til 12 weeks seems strange to me.. I hope I don't sound rude, I'm genuinely curious..

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

Because my mother was pretty nasty to me about my pregnancy and mothering skills whilst pg and that was a major stressor, plus none of the iLs thought to mention it to DH that his brother and his wife were expecting #2, so DH and I decided not to tell family until the baby was here and actually enjoy the pregnancy second time around.

As for friends - I'd tell some local friends and BB friends, but not people who would mention it to family or push me to do medically stuff, so most of my old friends are out!

I will also point out that most of those who I wouldn't mind telling wouldn't be so rude as to ask me if I were pregnant.

[Traveller]

I hid my last one because, having just dealt with a miscarriage that everybody knew about (and it was great to have support, but also saddening to lose the friends who couldn't deal with my grief) it was nice to just keep this one to myself. I didn't tell my family because I was emigrating to Scotland and wanted to surprise them with my big belly at the airport but they found out 2 weeks before when DH accidentally let it slip over the phone. That wasn't until 18 weeks though.

[Lolpigs]

Why do so many people hide their pregnancies? I can understand from bosses, or people that may not be close (work acquaintances etc) but why hide it from your friends?? Especially if they guess.. I could understand not mentioning it, but to go to so much trouble to conceal it is a very strange concept to me.. Especially til 12 weeks.. If you had a M/C wouldn't you want the support of friends? I am also of the opinion that there is never a 'safe' time, so the til 12 weeks seems strange to me.. I hope I don't sound rude, I'm genuinely curious..

Yep I have always thought it was weird too, I guess it comes from a time when you didnt talk about that sort of thing? also i hope your little one is doing well now hun little fighter

[Kass79]

Hi. We are contemplating if we should tell or not tell. It's a strange situation for us, as my DP and I have been together for 8 months. But we've known each other for 8 years. I have 4 boys, clearly none which belong to DP, and this is his first. So, knowing his mother, we aren't sure how she'll take it. It'll be her first grand child, and we should tell her before we tell anyone. But on one hand I think, who cares, just tell her, but the other hand says, do you really want a lecture today? So I don't want to hide it, but timing is very off, as it wasn't planned, and we are still getting used to the idea ourselves.

I have never hidden a pregnancy until 12 weeks, and this will be my 13th pregnancy. I think the more support you have, is do much better than dealing alone, with a keeper or a miscarriage. I am glad for all the support I've had, and will continue to share my happiness and sadness, we just have to find the right time to tell MIL....I know she'll get used to the idea, it may just take some time.

[Lolpigs]

I have a MIL like that Kass, we are telling them today. I'll just be telling her we are happy and it was out decision and wont listen to any lecturing.. if it was your and your partners decision who is she to tell you what to do? Least that is how I see it.

Hope all goes ok