totally loving these replies...so much food for thought...

Meow: I am totally jealous hahaha! My last pg was so draining and tough: but i do wonder if that was circumstance...not great access to good wholesome food and whatnot and the stress of moving and living OS for awhile.

Tegam and Arte: that's been my biggest point of pondering...is it just simply that i have been going down this pg/baby road for a consistent without pause for so long that made the last pg so much harder (and had me vowing at the time to NEVER EVER want to go through it again...it was the hypermesis for sure that knocked me out).

Jessica: I too had bad muscle separation. i had it with all three but wonder if it has just been compounding and all of a sudden with my last baby it decided to really play up? Tubi grips...get some!

HotI: ahh and now another thing to consider! DD3 was an oops pg, unlike the other two i didnt have any body preparation or nourishment that was particular and i did feel that contributed in some way (I was still BF and a bit worn down).

The thing is, i get the comments from well meaning people that i can only have as many children as i want and cope because i am young and that if i were their age (they stopped at two) I wouldnt have the energy. Now, i find it a strange statement as i am tired and rundown, but maybe I am just not as tired or run down lol?!