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Thread: Enlighten me please

  1. #1

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    Post Enlighten me please

    I am currently having another stupid argument with my SIL (again!)

    She is of course an experr as she is already a mother, and of course I know nothing.

    Now basically, I am not going to do anything to put Junior's life at risk.

    She however says that this is not an illness and I should not do anything differently. She says it is perfectly safe to p lay contact sports, go jetskiing, skiing, etc. :eek:

    There is no way I would do any of those things, nor will DH let me.



    Would love your opinions please.

  2. #2

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    I agree that it's not an illness, but I don't think I would go jetskiing!!!
    Kelly xx

    Creator of BellyBelly.com.au, doula, writer and mother of three amazing children

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  3. #3

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    I agree with Kelly it's not a illness you just have to do somethings a little different.

    I wouldn't Play contact sports, go jetskiing, skiing but then i don't when I'm not pg LOL
    So do you do contact sports, jetsking and skiing ?
    Also with contact sports what kind of contact sport are you talking about ?


    I know some girls play netball when pg.

  4. #4

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    another point is, she is saying that babies cant die from being hurt. They is nothing you can do to lead to miscarriage and nothing you can do to prevent it.

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    I agree with your sister - but we are all different and our acceptance of risk is different.
    Generally the rule is you shouldn't do anything that you weren't doing before you fell pregnant with regards to exercise. So I completed a pretty tough and rigourous preseason for netball this year, so I had no problems playing netball competively this pregnancy till I was 12w. I umpired to 19w.
    So my body was used to it - it didn't have any problems keeping on going, and when I did have problems, I sure knew about it!! (Strained ligaments, out of breath etc).
    I personally wouldn't do anything that exerted extra forces on my body like skiing, water or snow, fast boating or an extreme sport. Thats just a little risky in my mind - but everyone is different!

    ETA - when I had my m/c my GP told me a friend of hers who is a dr lost her baby at about 10w the day after a tough netball game. Its pretty true that you can't cause a miscarriage by playing netball (unless you get a good thump in the guts in your secnd tri) but apparently even that dr couldn't stop blaming herself for it. You just gotta be sensible andknow when enough is enough. Everyone is different.

  6. #6

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    Yeah I agree. I have a very physical job with heaps of lifting & restraining animals and sometimes I just "know" that it is too much for my body. When I was pregnant with Matilda I was sitting on top of large rottweilers worried about what would happen if I fell off while we were trying to do something. BUT I think you have to be the one to judge what your body is capable to handling. In one sense you can't predetermine whether or not you will m/c. But in another you do need to protect your babies life & yours

  7. #7

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    I went riding while I was pregnant with Yasin before my bump was showing but I took it easy and I love riding so I was fairly confident of my ability to saty on a quiet horse.
    I think that you should stick to doing what you're comfortable with. Your SIL obviously has a differant comfort zone than you and its knid of insensitive of her to try and push you into her zone.
    Its great to get some excercise while you're pregnant but you should stick to the options that aren't going to stress you out. I found that a round of golf was a nice gentle option for excercise when I was pregnant.
    Your SIL isn't quite correct that there is nothing you can do that can lead to miscarriage - a blow to the stomach would definately hurt bubs and it could casue placental abruption. Raised body temperatures can also cause problems.

  8. #8

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    I played netball when pg with Paige until 13 weeks and then the comp ended anyway. I have also water skiied when pg with Lindsay at 27 weeks pg, but again I was damn confident in my ability not to fall off or get hurt. Around the farm I have also still actively helped out with livestock and again I was confident and knew what my limitations were. I wouldn't reccomend to everyone to do what i have done, but trust yourself and your instincts and you will be fine.

  9. #9

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    If you didn't play contact sports, do jetskiing, etc before you were pg then obviously it would not be wise to start them up while pg! But if you did play sport or do other exercise beforehand then it is ok to continue, or maybe continue but take it a bit easier. My sister has always worked with horses, ridden horses, been in comps and all that and when she was pg she continued to ride as her doctor told her it was ok. Obviously she took it easy and didn't take any unnecessary risks. Myself, I have never been sporty or horsy so I don't do these things while pg either!

    I am not sure about the m/c thing - I have read of instances where m/c has been caused by something, usually out of the mother's control, like a car accident or being injured, but then of course there are the cases where there is no reason - it just happens. I will always worry in the back of my head about it happening, can't help it even though it has not happened to me before, but at the same time I do not want to wrap myself up in cotton wool either.

  10. #10

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    I wouldnt do those things either, whether theyre perfectly safe or not. Theres still a risk involved and i dont want to be the one feeling guilty if something was to go wrong. Its the same with the foods you have to avoid during pregnancy. I maybe a little anal but id rather be for 9 months of my life and know that my baby is perfectly fine that do or eat something and my baby to be harmed because of it. If other people see differently then thats my choice and thats their problem.
    Thats my opinion anyways

  11. #11

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    Well it may not be an illness, but this week it certainly is feeling like one!

    I was quite willing to keep playing soccer when we were discussing TTC, but once I was actually pg, I felt very different about it. I play physically and have copped more than a couple of hits to my tummy in my time playing so I wouldn't have continued playing after all (an ankle injury put an end to those thoughts anyway).

    On the other hand, we're going to Tokyo Disneyland in two weeks and I'll be going on everything. There are no rides that give impact to the tummy, the worst I'll get is a bumpy ride, which is really no worse than my bus and train ride home!

  12. #12

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    oh, well a lot of rides (even moderate rides) say pregnant women should not ride. Hence the reason we are cancelling our trip to qld

  13. #13

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    Danni we recently went to Seaworld and every ride bar the kids ones says "It's not recommended to ride if you are pregnant". They have to say that to avoid litigation. Of course I am not suggesting that every ride would be perfectly safe, I certainly avoided the rollercoaster but I did go on the tamer ones. Of course at the time my belly was not as big as it is now, I think if I had a big belly I wouldn't have gone on anything, because I wouldn't have been comfortable if I could even fit!

  14. #14

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    Danni, you decide what your comfortable with...

    I didnt know with Maddy that I was preg til about 15ish wks & I was gewtting all around bali on motorbikes & did a pushbike riding tour with annoying yanks (but that's another thing).. With Maddy it kinda happened that i was preg & well as it happened so easily I took it for granted that I was gonna have a healthy baby (never thought anything other than that).

    Til trying for over a year to make a baby & then a miscarriage made me really realise it can happen for no reason & so once I was carrying Indah i felt like I did wnat to be wrapped up in cotton wool til I was holding a healthy baby again...
    I was super over protective of my tummy & I wouldnt do anything that jeopardised my baby...
    Even though I had a bad fall a day after her due date & she still wouldnt come out, that is besides the point, she's still stubborn!

    But you do what's in your comfort zone... And yep having just come back from QLD, most of the rides did say unsuitable for pregnant women..... ETA: SNAP Bon!!!!!

  15. #15

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    I remember I went jetskiing when I was prob 3/4 mths pg with Joshua. I had a little bump cos I remember I got sunburnt a bit on my belly. I didn't go crazy on the jetski, just kinda puttered around.

  16. #16

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    In normal day to day activity there is nothing you can do in your first trimester to cause a miscarriage. This includes intercourse, lifting, physical activity (as long as it is within the scope of what you were doing pre-pregnancy and your doctor hasn't banned them for specific reasons). The uterus sits below the pubic bone. It is a thick, muscular organ at that stage and stuck behind a bone for additional protection. Many women feel guilty that they have done something to cause a miscarriage but this is rarely the case. It is true there is nothing that can be done to prevent an imminent miscarriage.

    In the second trimester and beyond, the uterus thins as it stretches and pops above the pubic bone. Direct trauma at this stage can result in yucky things happening (placental abruption, uterine rupture etc) but they are still relatively rare.

    Physical activity should be done to your comfort zone ie don't start running marathons at this stage if you weren't before but your body will also let you know what you can and can't do. I was going to the gym while pregnant and found as I progressed my level of comfort changed and so did the activities I did. The seated bike became a no go due to the movement of my knees near my belly. You just need to keep your pulse rate below 140bpm. One of my friends was going to the gym and doing weights the day before she delivered (she is slightly mad and is very physically fit so this was not new to her)

    BUT for my next pregnancy I have no idea what physical activity I will be comfortable with. Just say to your SIL that while what she says may be correct you need to do what will make you comfortable during this pregnancy. Thank her for her advice but let her know that for you the best thing to do at the moment is X, Y and Z.

  17. #17

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    Totally agree with what the others have said, and just wanted to add, I got the feeling that this was a very much wanted pregnancy for you guys? So I think it is perfectly fine for you to want to take precautions, and she should understand that.

  18. #18

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    Dannii, I think that you can look at this a number of ways and ultimately it is your personal decision what you do. They say it's ok to keep up a level of exercise similar to your pre pergnancy activity, so if you were pretty fit and active before getting pregnant then it's ok to keep it up - although you may feel you need to take it easy anyway. However it is hard to say what activities may be risky in terms of harming the baby. For me personally I was reasonably active previously - gym plus trained in martial arts pretty seriously. When TTC I told my instructor I wasn't going to do anything involving contact - esp sparring and now I am pg I've decided to only do very low impact stuff, do some teaching and pretty much not train till after 12 weeks and then I'll only do non contact stuff at a less intense level. I still plan to go to the gym but doing shorter and less intense workouts. That's my personal decision.

    Now as far as your SIL goes - it's hard to say what is correct. Often m/c's are unforunately due to some problem with the baby although some medical conditions can predispose a person to having them. However I don't think I would want to cop too many knocks to the stomach or do something where there is a risk of serious falls. However you've heard froma number of women who played competitive sport, went skiing etc with no problems. A girl at work who is a snow skiing addict went skiing in the first trimester and is now 34+ weeks with a healthy baby.

    I think that it is ultimately up to you what you choose to do and it's got nothing to do with what your SIL says. I agree with Michelle's post esp the last paragraph, Talk to your SIL about what you feel and make your own choices for your pregnancy.

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