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Thread: older siblings...new baby on the way

  1. #1

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    Default older siblings...new baby on the way

    hi all, i was hoping to get some ideas on when everyone told thier child/ren that they would be getting a brother a sister. My son is 3 1/2yrs old and has been asking for a baby for about 6 months( half as long as we TTC).
    i am only very early into my pg and realise that telling him now would not be good for various reasons but when is the right time to tell him without him feeling like the baby is taking too long? :-k

    i would appreciate any feedback that you are willing to share.



    kas

  2. #2

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    Hi Kas!

    I think it depends greatly on every child and how they are and how they would cope. Is your son generally impatient? If not you should be fine. My SIL is pg with twins (currently in hosp awaiting labour) and Paris has known about her pregnancy from day dot, she has not showed any signs of impatience at all. Now that I am pregnant we chose to tell Paris as she's very intuitive and would have figured it out in no time. She some how knows what a HPT is and is very cluey in all respects! The only reason I was hesitant about telling her was because if I miscarried I wouldn't want to devistate her iykwim. She is like your son and desperately wants a sibling. But then I thought long and hard about it and would rather she knew from day dot and was part of every experience from the US's to the OB appts, everything! This will more than likely be our last pregnancy, due to the fact it took us so long to conceive so I want to make it something we all remember. If you are concerned though, a few friends of mine waited until the 12-13 wk scan and made it a "family event" so that they could *see* the bubs and know it was there. Whereas Paris knows that already, we had a scan last week and couldn't have her minded in time and had to take her with us. She is soooo proud, loved it when she could see the baby and hear the heartbeat. She even has a copy of the scan pictures for herself. Every child is different, as is every parent and family unit as a whole I personally think its up to you

    Goodluck with your decision!

    *hugs*
    Cailin

  3. #3

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    Nov 2004
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    Maddison is almost 7, so you can imagine she has wanted a sibling as long as I can ever remember!

    She has it marked on every calendar & diary that she has that the baby is due on Sept 13th.. Even at school they have some weekly countdown..

    We did have a M/C & had told her as soon as we knew that we were preg, but I spent an afternoon in Hospital & she knew, we told her that the baby had gone to live with angels & would then go to the right Mummy, coz we were not the right ones for that baby!
    Initially I did not want to tell anyone when we fell again, but I guess they realised from the grin from ear to ear, so we told her too & she knew we had to be careful, now she is amazed at baby rolling in my big belly!

  4. #4

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    Hi - my daughter is 3.5 and she came with me to the doctors when I had my second pregnancy confirmed. So she knew right from the start. She seemed to forget about it for a while and when I was about 10 weeks we started telling everyone and now we know its a boy, she tells everyone that her mummy has a baby boy in her tummy.

    I'm happy for her to know and if anything had gone wrong earlier, then she has the 3 year olds version of dying and heaven so I think she would have accepted that.

    Although, I think this baby will have a lot to answer for when he arrives - as mummy is not allowed to yell, run, pick up too many toys because of the baby!

    Barb.

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