hi melinda

i thought i too would add my 2cents worth as well lol.

when my dd was 12mths old we decided to ttc, i remember feeling quite anxious about this as she to was extremely clingy, she stuck to me like glue lol. i do remember saying to my dh that i was scared of having another and i didn't think i would have enough love for 2 but we wanted a sibling for jess and i was 30 then and thought because it took us around 3 yrs to finally fall pg we should maybe start asap - yup i got prg straight away, jay was born when jess was 21mths old, i remember the early mths of prg feeling like total crap etc but was lucky cause jess was still have 2 sleeps a day and i could rest heaps. we told jess she was going to have a brother/sister when i was around 12wks and i don't think she really understood but as she got older and saw the belly getting bigger she got right into it - putting nappies on her dolls etc etc. when jay was born i actually packed a photo of jessie and took it to hospital with me so when she came in to visit she would see that i had her photo and she was thrilled. i remember when we were leaving for the hospital and mum and dad came over to watch jessie and she just screamed as we left - yup she was still clingy then lol. you know what those years i had with jess and jay (just under 2yrs of them being together) were the best years of my life and they grew up soooooooo close there was no fighting etc and i knew i could leave the room when jay was a baby and i knew that jess would not touch him - she was so caring and i got her involved from the day he came home - we made a few adjustments such as she got very upset he was sleeping in our room and she wouldn't go to bed so i fixed that by putting jay straight into the cot and bang no more problems. i truly wish she was here still with jay as they would have been so close.

i have 4 1/2yrs diff between jay and lani and this time it is very different, jay is independant and it is kind of like being a first time mum again but with a bit more knowledge and not so stressed lol. he too is very good but does try to help a lot (ie carry lani around the house etc) he also attempts to change nappies.

i don't think there is any right age or spacing to have children - all ages and stages are different and present new challenges but just remember if you were to fall prg now or in the near future 9mths is an extremely long time in the development of a baby/toddler.

i also think it is completly natural to worry about such things because it is unknown just like the very beginning of ttc your first - the fear of the unknown can be a bit overwhelming but you do cope - hey my g/friend has a neighbour who has just had child number 18 yup 18 do you believe it a breeding machine lol.

sorry for the epic and good luck in your decisions whichever way you choose to go.