Wow thank you all so much for your honest and really insightful responses! I feel less alone in this now and that helps! It's also obviously not always LTTTC that gets in the way, but also other circumstances, so maybe I should stop getting angry with my stupid body!

I KNOW that there is another child to join our family. I just don;t know how long I can sustain the energy and emotion that goes into trying to get them. I guess I just have to accept what is. I was just told today that the pregnancy I just lost was probably twins. It makes it worse, I always wanted 3 kids but we decided on trying for 2 for various reasons.

I guess our families are all how they were meant to be.

Thank you so much for your responses.