Pregnancy after Long Term TTC #8

[sammiejam]

Oh Girls,

Thank you all so much. You have NO IDEA how much comfort your words bring me right now...

A Klein Spitz is very similar to a pomeranian but slightly bigger, different shaped nose and doesnt shed or smell doggie Our Bob "The Butterball" Trimbole (his "circus" pseudonom lol) aka Troublesome Bob (when being a ratbag) or Lil Bob as he was generally known really was our sourrogate baby. He was with me all day every day and was a perfect little pooch who lived to please. Everyone loved him. DH is totally and utterly shattered. My heart is so broken and I have been sobbing since it happened. We will be getting him back in a few days in a beautiful urn with pawprints and locks of his fur. I think they are putting his fur in a locket for me so i can have him with me all the time.

We just had him for such a short time, it seems so unfair. I still cant shake the feeling that we failed him by leaving him alone. Maybe we could have helped him if we had been there. DH keeps saying that he killed him The garage he was in was airconditioned and there was no poison or anything around. If he had been bitten by a snake or spider he would have shown signs of it so we dont think that happened. Even if he had choked on something there would be signs, surely. I truely believe it was a heart attack. We decided against an autopsy because well, hes gone and it wont help knowing if it was something that we could have prevented or helped with. To know that for sure would just make it SO very much worse...

Again, thank you all so much for being there for me at a time when you should just be hearing happy, fun things. It honest means so much to me.

Grub - that is one GORGEOUS baby. The only thing that has bought a smile to my face since the hideous event.

Hugs everyone,

Me.

[Murph01]

hi girls,
just to add to sammiejams bit of comfort, hope you don't mind a few more photos. xox

Angela Bengsen's Photos - Jasmine's first Christmas 2009 | Facebook

[Greenslw]

Samiejam a lost pet can be so hard, they give us so much love and they are so dependant on us. I lost my cat last Chrismas and it was so hard.

Grub glad you can persist with the expressing well done, I'm sure it will sort itself still so happy for you..

Paula goodluck Wednesday

Hi Boc, glad you are in the normal range (the only time normal is good in pg and with kids )

ATM went to Target yesterday good bargains on baby stuff ladies. If you are brave, so many agro ppl. Really no need. I think being pg has made me so much more zen, I would like to spred the love I telll you life is way to short for yelling at your kids, wife hubby or a total stranger who drives the wrong way into a shopping park. the language I heard in the car park was awful.

Today I'm cleaning the pram and just relaxing, in to work tomorrow then not back till after my birthday on the 5/1.

Oh funny baby brain moment to share:: I left my work VISA at the shop in Christmas eve, and guess what? they kept it. See there are nice ppl out there.
Have a great day all.

[barney]

aww murph thanks for sharing those pics hun as usual i just love them you all look so relaxed and chilled out ,your home is just beautiful and so is your little girl what a wonderful beautiful christmas yay .
oh yeh and thanks for linking it like that again to murph cause i can see them hehehe

[BOC]

Awww Smithy hun...

FINALLY! I was able to get onto your Piczo and catch up. I just loooooove the video of Charlie kicking! Almost brought a tear to my eye!

My contrary little child doesn't cooperate as well, sometimes I can feel my belly moving but as soon as I look down to catch it, it stops. Same with every time DH goes to feel a kick we stop again! So frustrating (mind you doesn't help that Daddy is super impatient and only keeps his hand there for 5 seconds )

I'm trying to train him, he keeps leaning over and saying "hurry up and come out already Cookie!" and I keep saying "No no no! Not yet!". As much as I would love my little bundle in my arms NOW, I don't want to risk any complications, however trying to explain this to a male can be difficult at times. I do have this funny feeling though, 36 weeks seems to stick in my head, don't know whether that is when I will deliver or when I will go into hospital but it's just a feeling...

Murph: Jasmine's first Xmas looks lovely! and v. jealous of the beautiful Daintree surroundings you have too!

Green: I'm with you, I'm a big believer of doing the honest thing, especially at Xmas. A kid dropped a wallet full of money right in front of me at the shops the other week and I had to waddle as fast as my little cankles would carry me to catch up with him, finally caught him about to get into a lift, well I tell you he thanked me a million times & looked like he was going to cry! It's sad when people just don't expect it anymore, to me it's just normal, you find something, you give it back. (Mind you, looking at the credit card balance today, a magic wallet full of money would come in handy right about now!)

Sammie: Did you go through Pets at Peace? That's who I used, can't compliment them enough, they were so lovely and did a great job. And I find it really comforting having Chocky around the house and saying hello to him every now & then. Thinking of you hun

Hope everyone is planning great NYE, ringing in what will potentially be the best year of our lives! We have a 50th birthday to attend that night, it's a slogan t-shirt party. For DH I found a shirt that says "I Wanna Rock & Roll All Night, And Party... Some Days After A Nap"(If you knew my virtually-narcoleptic DH you'd see the funny side of it) and for me, I have just bought a plain maternity singlet and I'm buying a t-shirt transfer to print up that reads (printed up like a movie billboard)

Coming Soon to a Hospital Near You..

"LABOUR"

Rated MA15+ - Not suitable for viewing by persons under 15 years
Contains some horror, nudity, mild violence and strong coarse language

Should be a good night, just waiting to hear yet if DH has to work NY day or not.

Hope you're all having a good Monday, ours is miserable and wet. I was hoping to sit in my PJs all day but realised there's no food in the house so better go make the pilgrimage to Coles *sigh*

[barney]

yay hunny glad you got to see it lol..
and i just love that saying for your singlet how funny.
and im the same sitting here with no food ,really need to get some but dh has the car at work all the kids are at mums so looks like chips and gravy from the shop over the road raining and wet here to hun.

[wantbaby#2]

GRUB~ just viewed your pics of Ashton...what a BEAUTIFUL baby boy!! You look like a beautiful family and doesnt dad look proud!!??
MURPHY~ Also viewed pics of baby Jasmine.She is so pretty isnt she.She looks like both of you.Love the pic of her lying on the lambskin next to the dog..hahaha.Cute!

AFM im having my second scan on Wednesday and i will be 9 weeks.Im really nervous as i havnt had many symptoms the whole pregnancy and now they seem to have almost gone.I had a good heartbeat at 6 weeks 6 days but am feeling like everything is a dream.This doesnt feel real.I have been so down this week.I cant control my moods at all and im arguing with everyone.
I feel so alone and so confused.I suffer depression and thought it had gone away but seems to have appeared again.I just hope and pray that we still have a heartbeat on wednesday.Ive read about it happening so often even though the chance is low after already seeing the hb,but everyone on the forums say its happens all the time.now i cant stop worryiing.

[TaRhLi.]

Hi Girls

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and just think next year you will all be sharing with your babies, scary huh..

BOC: Love the singlet idea, gotta add some humour to the proceedings...

Grub & Murph: Love the photo's, Murph we... sorry I mean Santa got Tara the same Activity Centre..

Anyway girls thought I would update you with some photo's of Tara, can you believe she is 11 weeks old today......Login | Facebook

[Baby Dreamtime]

OMG ladies, your babies are all so beautiful, thanks for putting the links in, so glad you all had a lovely first Christmas with your new bubs.

Wantbaby#2, best of luck for your scan on Wed, you will be absolutely fine, just hope that reassurance of seeing your baby's tiny heart beating sets your mind at ease. Don't worry about no symptoms, Lilmiss was the same, she is having a boy

Smithy, chips and gravy sounds divine. Hope your cute belly and Charlie girl are doing well.

BOC, your NYE sounds like it will be great, and love the tshirt idea. We are planning pretty much nothing, I am not sure I can cope with much else, and not even sure I will make midnight

Greenslw, good on you for getting some great bargains and braving the crowds. Not long to go now, hope you are travelling well, and enjoy your break.

Sammiejam, I totally understand how you feel too, it is so hard, but it does get easier. Hope you are taking care.

Paula, good luck for your scan Wednesday, looking forward to hearing your good news, thinking of you.

Hi to everyone else!

AFM, I am feeling super tired, have the sorest feet, and really starting to slow down moving around. Rolling over in bed is a killer, and I have really bad pelvic pain, but other than that, I am totally in love with my two girls and love feeling them move, just hope I can keep them baking as long as possible. I have a OB appointment next Tue, I will be coming up to 33 weeks, so not long to go. Am really aiming for 36 weeks if I can. Dr had promised to look at a VB as long as twin 1 was head down, unfortunately she moved about two weeks ago and is now in breech, so unless she swaps again, it will be a C-section for me, which I am pretty disappointed about, so am frantically googling how to turn breech twins. Fingers crossed for me.

Love to everyone xx

[Murph01]

I always will Smithy, cos I always have you in mind. Just a pity I can't see your belly dance. I don't have all the permissions on my new computer yet and can't get the latest flash reader for some reason. Anyway, glad you liked seeing the tiny tige. xoxo

Wantbaby - it's the worst time right now for anyone, let alone if you have anxiety or depression. I hope you find you have nothing to worry about, but do try to stay away from professor google, it will do your head in. You will find whatever you want to see, good or bad and it won't help you to gain any control over your own out of control situation. I hope you can relax a bit and get some comfort from yor scan on Wednesday

BDT good luck with getting your breech the right way up. be very careful if you decide to have it manipulated. I shudder to think of what might have happened if we had physically manipulated Jasmine as we found at birth her cord round her neck three times, plus other complications with my body. Caution is all I urge. there is a lot worse you can go through than a C-section to have your girls brought safely into your arms.

[Loveinamist]

Hi Ladies!

Grub - Ashton is lovely and it is great to finally see your face! You remind me so much of a friend of mine!

Wantbaby - it is a hard time when the symptoms slacken off but that is a good thing too because it means the placenta is taking over looking after the baby which means things are getting pretty established. I hope the scan reassures you. Google is to be avoided at all costs though. I avoided the internet almost completely between having my IVF and about 12 weeks. I found myself just reading sad stories and horror scenarios which wasn't helpful. It sounds terrible but I had to keep telling myself that people who have success or no complications just don't post on the internet so for every ten bad stories you hear there are a hundred success stories you don't hear. That is what got me through.

Greenslw- My DH is convinced I will have the baby on the 8th of January. I feel like he is in there forever!!!! How did the washing go?

BOC - enjoy the party! Like the tshirt idea!

Smithy - soooo jealous of chips and gravy. They don't do it properly here! I want Australian chips and gravy!!!! Hope the fact you are wanting chips and gravy is because you are feeling better!

Murph - love your pics. You live in a beautiful place. Jasmine is soooo beautiful too. Are her nappies wonderoos?

Kelly - going to look at your pics now!

Sammiej- so sorry to hear about your little dog.

Babydreamtime- I hope bubs moves into the right position. I cannot imagine how bad the pelvic pain would be with twins!!!

AFM- spent the Christmas period panicking about preeclampsia as the midwife found protein in my urine and my blood pressure was high for me on Christmas Eve. She took my bloods and I find out tomorrow. However a calmer midwife saw me today and said my blood pressure while high for me is still not dangerous and the protein is just a trace. I haven't any of the other symptoms so she is not too concerned. Hopefully the blood test results tomorrow confirm this. I got a silly cold/flu thing over the Christmas period so have been coughing terribly and feeling yuck. So I wasn't sure as well if my head hurt because I was all bunged up or because it was preeclampsia!!!
Anyway the midwife assured me today that if I did have preeclampsia then it doesn't necessarily mean I would be induced. I want to avoid induction like the plague. She said they would be more likely to treat the blood pressure and keep the baby in until it is ready to come out. Only if the blood pressure gets dangerous they would consider induction. So anyway fingers crossed the blood tests are ok tomorrow.
I thought the baby might be on his way but I think he will go full term now. All those period cramps etc have gone. He is still 2/5 engaged for the second week now so hasn't made any more downward movements. My belly still looks high and although the pelvic pain is still shocking, I haven't felt any downward pressure. So I am resigned to 40 weeks at least now!!!

Belly rubs everyone!!!

[Greenslw]

Poppyfairy OMG the WASHING! it never ends and to make things worse I got some kind of stain on a batch of cloths so into the napisan and wash again but no stains now. I have everything crossed for you to not be induced. the 8th of Jan sounds good to me. I'm the 4th happy to share my birthday too goodluck today

Oh Murph Jaz is just beautiful

Baby Dreamtime you are doing so good for 33 weeks with 2 bubbas I can't imagine how uncomfortable that is. I think we'll all have abs of steal when babies are out. Turning in bed takes all my muscles and I'm sure there is a 6 pack under there, you'd be in for an 8 pack for sure goodluck with baby turning.

Wantababy Goodluck for Wednesday. a good hb at 6 weeks is great. nerves are all normal but they do go away as your further along. Keep thinking positive.

Smithy Chips and gravy hmmmmmmmmmm Yummy. hope you are enjoying the rain. 34C and rising here.

Boc love your DH shirt, my DH is addicted to them some are so naughty but he seams to match them with his mood. I guess it's one way of knowing what's on a man's brain. Also gold star on the kid chase I'm sure you made his year.Although at this point in my pg I would have yelled rather than chased.

Well another night of no sleep. I fell asleep on DH belly last night while he was rubbing my back, poor DH had a sparkle in his eye and I just zonked out. I'm not completly aposed to special cuddles atm but I need to be in at least 2/10 enegy zone by 10pm at night i'm at -5!

So I'm on weekly ob appointments now, not sure why I need to. I only step in for 5 mins have my bp taken lie down she checks my belly bubs hb and I'm off. and pay $8 for parking. I never have any questions as If I need to know something I need to know it NOW!

[Loveinamist]

Midwife rang tonight with blood test results. Uric acid levels are raised slightly so it means my kidneys are starting to be affected so looks like preeclampsia. She has booked me into the hospital tomorrow for monitoring and more tests. Made the mistake of googling and am a bit of a mess. Seems my natural birth hopes are dashed. Best case scenario is an induced labour which I dread due to the intensity of the contractions and the almost inevitable need for further intervention. This is unless the baby decides to come of his own accord pretty soon which I don't think is likely since he is only 2/5 engaged and I am having no downward pressure, cramps or signs.

[wantbaby#2]

Poppy fairy,Murph,Grenslw,baby dreamtime~

THANKYOU for your encouraging and supportive replies.I have stopped googling.I have to for my own sanity.What you were saying about how mostly negative stories are posted is probably correct.My mother said the same thing about that. The scan is only 1 day away so then i will know.I think the fear lessens the closer you get to the scan date until 10 minutes before,then your a nervous wreck with jelly legs and a butterfly tummy. I will post as soon as i get home from the scan.

My mother went to hospital lastnight too via ambulance so have been up there til 3am then again at 10 this morning.That has frightened me but has also taken my mind off worrying about my scan,a bit.Dr said she will be fine.Home in a few days.


Poppy~
Hoping all goes well with your baby.YOU should stop googling too! LOL It seems we all cant help ourselves.I had mild pre eclampsia with my son.i was only 19 when i had him and it was pretty scary but dr got it under control and bub is now 12 yrs old and perfectly fine.just rest as much as you can and follow dr orders.

Belly rubs to all

[barney]

omg poppy im so thinking of you my friend and hope all will be just fine,take care sweets xoxo

and mrph just had to show dh your pics and his loves them too hun he says your place is beautiful and your pork looks so bloody yummy lol might even go and get one to cook tomorrow .

[saph204]

Poppy I had preeclampsia with Campbell, By the time I got the official blood results back I had already gone into labour. They sped my labour up with drugs but in the end it was all ok. Just remember that at 37 weeks you are already considered full term. Oh by the way Campbell came at 38 weeks.

AFM - Had a lovely christmas away with my brother and his family was very nice. Feeling very over the whole thing. My physio suspects I also have given myself a hernia as well now because my stomach muscles are working so hard to hold everything because my pelvic muscles are so damaged. Oh well not long to go now only a few more weeks.

[lilmisshavachat]

Hey Poppyfairy.. I just wanted to pop in a tell you that my Mum was induced with both my brother and I and she had us naturally... I believe there are a couple of different cerix ripening gels and it is recommended to have the removeable type (On a string I think kind've like a tampon) so that if the contractions get too strong straight up they have some control... Ask them to increase the dose of the oxytocin substitute in the lowest possible amounts as well to try and control the strength of the initial contractions... If you are being induced try to avoid artificial rupture of your membranes as keeping them intact will protect the baby and yourself from strong contractions for as long as possible ... Best info I can give is try to get a hold of the book "the thinking womans guide to a better birth" by Henci Goer... Has some great info on inductions and what is necessary during them... Good luck Hun... I hope it doesn't come down to that...
Dee

Hi to everyone else... Merry Christmas...

[LondonMiss]

Hello all and I hope you are all well. We're back a day early from our Christmas break due to extreme levels of pregnancy brain when booking plane tickets. Oh well

I won't do too many personals, just a few if you don't mind. Sammiejam, I read earlier today although didn't respond and was sat in the Qantas lounge in Adelaide with tears streaming down my face (DH's first response "what have I done now??, bless) at your news. I cannot imagine how hard it must have been to find your dog. I worry about it all the time. Esp since the news once showed a small show type dog inside a snake in the NT. I hope that you can get over the not knowing.

Greenslw - you are so right about the language you hear from some people. In Perth last week, we saw a woman crossing four lanes of traffic with about 6-8 kids. The eldest was pushing a baby, and as he went over the kerb, the pushchair full over and tipped the child (not strapped in of course) out. What does the mother do? Stop the traffic? Offer assistance or help? Worry about the screaming child? No, she shouts at the eldest "you f****** c***, you are f****** c****** useless" and so on for quite a long time . You get the drift. I didn't even think you could add ing on the end of the C word....

PoppyFairy, you are soooooo wrong about the chips and gravy ha ha it isn't right here you can't get chips and curry sauce... now that's a dish to build a baby on... But seriously, I hope the pre-eclampsia is ok. I agree with the others, step away from the search engines...

hope you are all otherwise well. Less than 200 days to go for me hurrah hurrah hurrah