A caring obstetrician after a loss

[Lemonade]

Hi All,

I'm not pregnant yet....but hopefully will be soon. I just wanted to get your opinions as I'm sure you'll all understand how important it would be to have an understanding obs after a loss.

After a traumatic 19-week loss, we didn't hear from our obs for over 7 weeks. I had some concerning symptoms and went to see another obs (as she was on holiday). He sent me for HCG tests and called me at 6:30pm that night to give me the results. However when my obs returned and I went for follow up tests, she didn't call me - everything went through the secretary.

Then when we went to our post-m/c appointment, she still didn't have all our results and didn't at all make us feel that we were being cared for.

She is exceptionally popular in Sydney and I think that is part of the problem - she seems to busy to make any calls or give us the impression that she is caring for us personally.

I am concerned that for my next pregnancy, I am not going to get the reassurance from her that I will probably really need.

I wanted to know if any of you could help with recommendations of obs in the Sydney area (at POWP or RHW) that have been supportive and caring post-loss.

Thanks,
Lemonade

[Oorki Galoorki]

sorry for your loss lemonade.
have you looked at other options available to you rather them limiting your self to an OB?
It is really important to know what kind of birth you want and the type of relationship you want from your care provider, then look for that care provider.

continuity of care is VERY important to women in pregnancy and labour and usually only available from midwives as OBs do not sit and hold your hand while you are labouring.

[Taurean78]

Lemonade, I am sorry to hear that your ob was not supportive after your loss. I can only imagine how it would have made you feel at a time where you were no doubt bewildered as it was.

I am having my baby at POWP any day now and my Ob has been great. Having said that, I don't know how he handles patients who have lost babies before but I will sum him up for you.

He is very experienced and works out of RHW and POWP. We are an IVF preg and he has been reassuring the whole way through without being overbearing. This was a new style for me as the IVF process is so closely monitored and managed.

He is very calm and reassuring but also "keeps things real". In a way, at first I felt he was a bit "hands off" but when I had bleeding at 15w and false labour at 31w, I learnt that he really steps up and is there for his patients 100%. That is, he is not alarmist and is not over-the-top. His rooms are low-key, no fancy ultrasound or coffee machines and he is quite old-school in that he won't weigh you unless you look as though you haven't put on enough weight or if you look as though you've porked out

He does not charge a management fee at around 20 weeks like so many other obs.For any emergency appts I had with him, I was bulk-billed (it's not all about the money but it's almost unheard of these days). He rarely takes holidays and has 1 sick day in his extensive career.

The midwives at POWP sing his praises and I have no doubt he will be great when my turn comes.

If you would like his details, just PM me. I can also pass on the names of other OBs in the east who were recommended to me by my fertility acupuncturists and who friends have used and highly recommended.

Best of luck with everything and I hope you find the care provider you need.