Miscarriage after carrying first baby healthy and happily

[Serenitylee]

Hi everyone

I have a 1yr old girl and through my pregnancy with her I had no issues at all and everything was going great until my waters broke at 33 weeks and she ended up coming early and by ECC as she was breech.

I recently found out I was pregnant again and was very excited and was about 8-9 weeks along and then I had a miscarriage. My partner and I were devestated but we would like to try again when we are ready, my only concern is that it will keep happening and I am still really shocked and upset that it happened as I had no issues with my first pregnancy and would have almost called it perfect.

Just wondering if anyone else has a similar story but was able to happily fall pregnant again?

Mara

[Lisa]

Hi Mara,

I'm really sorry for your loss hun.

In my experience, a miscarriage doesn't mean you're going to have it happen again. I have had 2 miscarriages and one late loss. I had 2 healthy children before my late loss, then I had another healthy little man, then a miscarriage, then I had a healthy little girl and another miscarriage.

Like you, I was shocked when I had issues with bub #3. I kinda just assumed that because my first 2 had been born so healthy and there were no issues through either of the pregnancies, that it was a given that my #3 pregnancy would be the same. I now know that getting a healthy bub at the end of any pregnancy is a miracle and such an amazing blessing - one I will never again take for granted.

I will hope & pray that your future pregnancy (or pregnancies) result in beautifully healthy bubba's for you to bring home and hold forever.

________________________________________
Noah Thomas (20w5d) 8w2d 5w2d
& 4 precious earth angels

[countrygal_83]

Hi Mara, so sorry for your loss. I conceived my first DD and had a 'perfect' pregnancy with her also. When TTC#2 we conceived but lost our angel at 8weeks. 8mos later we conceived our beautiful DD2 and I went on to have a happy and healthy pregnancy and birth. I have heard a few women have a loss when TTC#2, my SIL had a blighted ovum and had a D&C and only 4mos later conceived. She is over halfway now and everything is perfect.

I'm sure you will be fine. The pain of the loss is still very raw, make sure you communicate with your partner about how you are feeling and know that feelings of jealousy are perfectly normal.

Good luck in your TTC journey.

[Glamourcide]

Mara, I'm very sorry to hear of your loss *hugs*
I fell pregnant with my second baby when my daughter was just a few months old. Unfortunately, that little bub left us at around 9 weeks, on Christmas Eve, but I'm very grateful to be able to say that a few months later I fell pg first try (I went back on the Pill in the meantime until DH and I were ready to start trying again) and had a very healthy, easy pregnancy and am now mum to two beautiful girls. Early losses, while devastating, are apparently very common so please don't feel that you won't be able to have more babies - many of us here have been there and gone on to have wonderful pregnancies and healthy babies I wish you and your DH all the best when the time comes for you to try again, and in the meantime, I hope you both have lots of support to help you process what's happened and are able to mourn and move on (sorry if that sounds insensitive, I don't mean it that way!). Have you considered getting in touch with a counsellor or organisation like Bonnie Babes etc that can give you specific help in coping with your loss? You may find some reassurance and positive mindset in talking to someone who is experienced and can help guide you and your DH through your grieving. Just a suggestion

Again, I'm very sorry you've had to go through losing a baby, and I wish you all the best.

[~Kim~]

Hi Mara, welcome to BB. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.
I'm another with a similar story. Fell with DD and then after nearly 2years of trying fell again, but that bub left us at 12weeks1day. I was devastated and thought I never wanted to try again, but someone else had other plans and we 'accidentally' fell with DS the very next cycle.
Sadly there aren't any guarantees for any of us.
Good luck

[Karen van]

Hi Mara

I am sorry you are here posting with us but I am glad this forum is here for you to be able to do this. I was like you and was very shocked at the loss of our Marley at 9 wks after a very easy preg and birth of our DD who was 3 when we started trying for our next bub. It suddenly undermined all of the blissful expectations we had around conception and carrying bubs. We were able to bury our bub and mourn in a very concrete way but it is amazing how awkwardly our society supports (or more to the point often doesn't) people who lose babies. I hope that there is a supportive network of people around you and that your confidence in probability (I acknowledge the point above about the fact that you never take anything for granted again - so there are no guarantees or absolute chances) returns. Three months after our loss I fell pregnant with our DS who is now 9 months and thriving. I am an older mum at 40 with DS so I had a lot of extra concerns about aging this and that and that hung around in the background as well. So as everyone above has shared - all of our babies, here or elsewhere, have a place in our heart and that it is only hope that can give us confidence to keep going.

Karen van