Sunshine -I am so very touched that your parishoner was able to give you the gift she had intended for little O. She was and is obviously holding little O and you in her heart. Well done for being able to accept the gift with such grace and humility. GL with the endorphin rush. In my experience it does help. January isn't too far away, but it will be a hard time emotionally for you no doubt. I hope the insurance company comes through for you and DH. Go gently as you heal. Life after the death of your child and losses is very very different, as you already know. Holding you and all of your family in my heart.