we want to find out - for us. having the 'gremlin' is cute, but i'd like to be able to bond with our baby properly, by naming it and embracing whatever we're having. not sure how many people we'll share with, as soooo many people have the attitude of "noooooooo, you'll ruin the surprise, don't do it" - i dunno, i think after what we've been through (which would be similar for you too Naomi) - the surprise was getting a BFP and holding the baby so far - getting to know the gender of the baby at 20 weeks instead of 40 is our choice! and one of the few things we get to choose!

i've said to people they don't need to know what gender the gremlin is - it's not about them - it's about us. my folks are rather old fashioned but have been really supportive about us finding out. they've said they're happy to not know if we keep it completely secret from everyone, but if we're sharing with friends, they'd like to know. i think we'll tell the people that knew at 4-5 weeks - they're the ones that supported us all the way through this journey, and have already asked. a couple are very crafty people, and want to know for making stuff! they don't know names though - a couple of BB girls know, my bro/sil and my mum are the only ones that know at this stage