I mean I know that I am pregant but I just feel like I have no emotional connection to my baby. I honestly thought that I would feel more excited than I do.
I saw my bubba on my 12 week ultrasound and was greatful that there was/is nothing wrong great little heartbeat very active but I just fee like I have no emotional connection.
I actualy bought more things for babies before I got pregant but because it took so long (3 plus years) I gave them all the my neice and nephew when they were born.
I have not bought anything at all, and when people talk about my pregancy I just want to change the subject
Sometimes it is difficult to feel bonded to something you can't touch and feel and see (apart from a few minutes during US). You have waited so long for your pregnancy and it sounds like you have a lot of expectations on yourself, expectations for how you will feel and behave. Three years build up... for something that at this point you can't see, touch and feel. At this point, it might seem like an anti-climax.
Be gentle with yourself. Take it slowly and stop expecting yourself to feel or behave in a certain way. You will bond with your baby... perhaps when you feel him or her moving around inside your tummy, maybe not until after he or she is born.
Enjoy as much of your pregnancy as you can, try to relax and take each day as it comes. Good luck!
You are not nuts at all. I have felt the same way, often. I have held off telling a lot of people, not for any reason other than I can't stand their excitement - I just can't share it with them, I'm not feeling it yet.
If you have anyone you can talk to about this, I recommend you do it. Even if you blog your thoughts here on BB for a bit, so others can share with you, and you won't feel so weird. I'm sure lots of others will have some great ideas on how to help bond with your baby.
I didn't really feel ANYTHING throughout pregnancy.. actually to be honest, DD is 5 months and I've only just started feeling excited about her!
Some people get all excited and emotional, some people are always calm and collected. Guess you and I are the latter!
I dont think your nuts, I too didnt 'feel' pregnant until i felt bubs kick the first time. Some nights i go to bed and when im almost asleep bubs kicks me and im like "what was that?" So yes i get where your coming from. I am sure you will bond with bubs as soon as you have him/her. If not it may take you a few months like Misty.
This is my 3rd pregnancy and I often 'forget' that I'm pregnant.
I think it comes with TTC long term and I guess it could be kind of like not 'counting your chickens before they hatch'?
TTC my last child took nearly 3yrs and I was kind of the opposite, where all I could think about and focus on was the pregnancy, to the point where it was too consuming, so in a way perhaps your way is better? Maybe look in to the Pregnancy After LTTTC threads and Parenting After LTTTC threads as well to see if anyone else has been through the same feelings?
I ended up with a bit of post natal anxiety after my last child and think it could have had something to do with LTTTC.
Hi Frantelle, i felt the same when i was pregnant with my last son, i was getting close to full term and felt i had no connection to him at all. But when i gave birth and saw him and held him for the first time i burst into tears and felt an instant connection. I'm now pregnant with twins and have very mixed feelings, still have to pinch myself cause i don't believe i'm pregnant!
I can completly empathsize with you. Feeling very similar myself at the moment, just dont feel as though I can really 'bond' with this little one. Having three other children is a challenge, as I already feel as though this little one is 'missing out' in some ways. I have decided to take some quiet time out for myself and bubs each week doing an ante natal relaxation and exercise class. That way it truly is just him and me Big hugs to you though...it will happen xo
I didn't feel much emotion, and still don't really for the pregnancy, in fact if anything, I've felt more guilt than any other emotion- guilt that I'm not as excited as maybe I 'should' be, guilt that the aches and pains are annoying, guilt that I'm not enjoying the whole experience, especially considering the difficulty that so many people have in TTC.
Although very excited about the prospect of our little one coming, I haven't felt much difference within myself as I thought I would.
Some things that have helped me were :
1. Finding out what gender we're having- (BOY!)
2. Talking to hubby about our future with bubba
3. Starting to buy things
I know it can be difficult to get excited, especially when/if there has been loss in the past, but just know that any feeling you're having is 'normal' ...that others have shared it, and if you're worried that your feelings are something that needs to be discussed with a professional, that you get the help you need...
Don't feel pregant
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